2 months

"It's been a while since I spoke about him... My brother that is. "
For the first time in 2 years, Evie opens up about her Brother's battle and loss with cancer. But what if the memories and emotions that she's been bottling up inside her for so long become too much?

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1. Finding Out

It's been a while since Ive spoken about this. I was 13 at the time, when my Brother Chris was diagnosed with cancer. He'd been experiencing difficulty breathing and found that he was wheezing a lot when he spoke. Reluctantly, he allowed us to take him to the doctors from there we were referred to at least 7 different hospitals where at each we were greeted with the same weary smiles and sorrow filled eyes. I wasn't really sure what was going on at the time I just presumed that he was a bit sick or something along those lines, but I knew something was wrong when I found him and Mum huddled on the couch sobbing together.
I will forever remember the day that they told me, it was raining outside so I stayed in the warmth and protection of the living room reading "Little Women" for the millionth time. They both walked in glancing at each other nervously and sat down beside me gently.
"Evie? Can we talk?" Chris said placing his hand on my knee,
"Sure" I said, looking up from my book smiling.
"Well you know that I've been... ill for a while now, right?" I nodded at him to continue
"Well... It's it's cancer." My world stopped right in that moment. I was only 13 but I knew what it was, a killer. I shook my head at him, half expecting him to jump up and shout "Gotcha!" I waited and waited for it but it never came. I looked over at mum with pleading eyes and she nodded her head trying to hold the tears in.
I felt a tear run down my cheek followed by a whole wave, no tsunami of them. I looked back at him, his head now bowed sobbing and hugged him
"We'll fight it together, you and me. You're going to grow up and meet the person you love and have kids and I'll be their Auntie Evie... And...and"
He put his finger to my lips, for some reason not being able to look me in the eye.
"Evie, I want all of those things but it's impossible" he whispered, I looked at him confused.
"It's terminal, I found it too late and now its spread to my neck as well as my lungs as there's nothing they can do about it.  I  have two months at the most..
"But that means Christmas" I looked up at him,
"I know, and we'll make it the best two months" He smiled bravely at me. I wanted to hit him for being so damn brave, he was dying and being this calm about it. I felt powerless so I did the only thing I could do, leaning over I hugged my big brother. When I held him in my arms it felt like I was holding bits of him together, he put his head on my shoulder and weeped gently making a wet patch on my T-shirt. I stroked his sandy blonde hair and hushed him I hated seeing him like this. When he looked up his blue eyes were glistening from the tears down his cheek and he whispered "I love you baby sis'"
 

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