Another love.

Silence got into our heads.

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4. Just let go.

Harry and me are standing outside Zayn´s house. “Thank you again Harry, but I shouldn´t have said it, I don´t know what I was thinking about, I just wanted him to see...” I didn´t finished my sentence when Harry cut me off, “It´s okay, look I know how hard it is, to see a person you love everyday, knowing he or she chose somebody else..”, he touched his lips and checked his phone. “Why do I have the feeling you´re talking about yourself?”I asked and went through my hair. “Cause I am. Ava,.., well lets talk about it later, alright? I think I should go...”, he looked at ground. “I´ll go with you just let me grab my jacket, it´s inside, don´t go anywhere! You need to tell me what was that about”. “Yeah, I´ll be there”, Harry smiled at me and I headed inside.

Music is loud, colourful lights hitting my face, it´s weird, It´s my party, I am supposed to be here, but I am leaving instead. I don´t feel like celebrating, I have nothing to celebrate. I am trying to find my jacket, but it´s nowhere to be found. All of a sudden I feel someone´s hand on my shoulder. “Hey”, it was Niall´s voice. “Oh, Hi Niall, I am just looking for my jacket, did you see it somewhere?” I asked, hoping, he won´t ask me any questions. “No, I didn´t, look, you´re avoiding my obviously, it´s because of that letter?” he touched my hand I swear my whole body shivered. “I am not avoiding you”, of course I am, “I just, I don´t think I can do this”, as soon as I said it Niall´s smile disappeared. “Do what? Ava? Did you read that letter at least?” he said angrily. “I did, thank you for your kind words, but I don´t think we can be friends,...”I just stood there, in front of him, he put his both hands on my shoulder, “It´s because I don´t love you? Just because of it, we can´t be friends? You´re being selfish Ava, you have no idea!” he shouted. That words what just came out of his mouth. He has no right to say a word LOVE in front of me. “I am being selfish? Good. You want my first wish come true? Be happy with her, alright? And let me be alone, for good, thank you!” I started to cry and he was just looking at me. “ Say hi to your girlfriend from me, don´t let her wait because of me, cause you know, I am so selfish”, I turned my face and left the room. Tears are coming down my face, for a second time today, what a birthday. I am outside, Harry is leaning against the house. “You´ve been crying Ava, what happened inside?” his eyes widened. “We´re done, I am done, our friendship is done”, as soon as I said the last word ,,done,, I started to cry even more, Harry opened his arms and hugged me. “I am so sorry...”, he whispered for himself. “Me too”, I leaned back from his hug and we both hit the road.

“I am hungry, can we go somewhere to eat?” I realised I didn´t eat anything for more then 12 hours. “Sure, I am hungry as well,” he said back and smiled. “We can go to my mum´s restaurant, it´s nearby!”. “Well, I can´t say no to that, can I”, he laughed but I could hear it´s not an honest laugh. “So Harry, who´s that girl?” I bravely asked. “Claire”, her name came out of his mouth. “What???” I screamed out loud. “What, what?” he asked angrily. “Nothing, it´s just, she is with Louis now, I thought you´re friends with both of them”. “I am, look, me and Claire, we know each other very well and...” he stopped. “And? You´re not trying to say you two hooked up, are you?” I stopped walking and looked him in the eyes. He was standing there, like he had no mouth at all. “Are you?”, I repeated myself. “Once, they had a break then, I thought it´s going to be more, but then, they got back together. Louis has no idea, or at least I think”. Wait, so, four months ago, when Claire and Louis broke up, for no reason, she was with Harry? “Look, she is my friend I can talk to her, or..”, he cut met off, “No way! She can´t find out you know! Promise me Ava, you won´t tell her, or anybody else, promise!”, he sounds serious. “I promise”.

The rest of the road was a bit awkward, cause we were both kind of quiet. Trying to process the things we found about tonight. “Here we are! Lets go!” I said thrilled. “Wait, this is yours mum´s restaurant? I go there every Friday with Liam! The food is so delicious!”. “Yes, my mum would be flattered, just let´s go, I am so hungry. We sat at the window table. When Ronald brought us our food, we started to eat it in that very second. “I love those ribs! They´re just so good!” Harry spoke up with a mouth full of ribs. “Right? Niall love those ribs as well..” I stopped talking, I just realised I want to forget about Niall, or at least I am trying to. “You´re not going to make it, you know that, right?” he started. “What do you mean?” I have no idea what he´s talking about. “To forget about him, or not talking to him, you can´t do it”, “I tried to avoid Claire when she got back together with Louis, but I just couldn´t”, said Harry. “I am so sorry Harry, I now exactly how you feel...”, I can´t believe I am sitting here with a boy I met just a few hours ago. “Yeah, me too. God, how ridiculous we are, both heartbroken, trying to eat our sorrow away”, he smiled and I realised he´s true. I am ridiculous. I don´t need Niall, I don´t need to see him everyday, I am better of without him and his girlfriend. He don´t need me, I don´t need him, it´s simple, is it.

“It´s because I don´t love you?”

Those words are stuck in my head forever.

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