Struggling To Let Go

September Bright moves to Boston after her father passes, leaving her best friend Niall Horan behind. Her mum moves on to an abusive step father, what will happen when she runs into Niall again? Will he be able to help her? Could she ever be happy again? But nothing lasts forever, and there always seems to be something or someone in the way..


17. Chapter 17

Niall’s P.O.V

As soon as I saw September I ran up and hugged her. She seemed a bit.. jumpy? No, nervous, why? I guess I could be over reacting. Maybe she’s just tired? Makes more sense. “You okay babe?” I asked cautiously. “mm, you?” mm? That’s not what she says when she’s okay. “Yeah I’m okay thanks.” I replied confused. “Wanna go out?” I asked hoping to get answers. “Tonight?” She said sounding surprised. “no, for 2019 on the 4th of August! Of course tonight you moppet.” I laughed. She looked even more confused. I’ll take that as a no then. “I’m too tired, sorry!” She barely whispered. Just as I expected. Is it me? Has she seen somebody else? She went upstairs leaving her phone behind. I know, I should trust her.. but she’s never like this. I picked her phone up and unlocked it. I looked at her texts which were all from me. Then her calls. Me, Perrie, wait. Unknown number? I sadly looked down. I can’t believe it. I knew she’d find somebody better than me. It’s just… well I’d guessed it would have been later rather than sooner. No. I will refuse that she cheated on me until I find a better ‘sign’. I sat back down after putting her phone back with the others. They were all their normal selves, so why wasn’t September?

“Niall, go and get September teas almost done!” Harry shouted from the kitchen. “Yep.” I said slowly walking to our room. I walked straight in and saw her lay on the bed looking fragile. She was awake but hadn’t noticed me yet. “Hey” She quietly mumbled once she’d finally realised I was there. “Hi” I mumbled back. “What’s wrong?” I ask sad that she wouldn’t just be honest with me. “Nothing. Why does there always have to be something wrong?” She said irritated. “Sorry” I said motionless still stood there, feeling like I was about to break down. She gave me a weak hug “I’m sorry, it’s just.. not been the best of days.” She simply said. I wanted to ask why but I knew she wouldn’t tell me. So I just nodded instead and left the room. “Teas ready.” I barely whispered. “I know.” She said walking next to me. I instantly stepped back away from her and went back to the room. “I’m not hungry, I’ll eat later.” I said and saw her slowly nod, she looked upset and I wanted nothing more than to cradle her in my arms and tell her everything would be alright. But what if it was for her and her possible boyfriend shes cheating on me with, and I just break? I needed to think. Why won’t she tell me the truth?

Louis’ P.O.V

September came down on her own looking upset and confused. No Niall? “Where’s Niall?” I ask confused. “Oh, he’s not hungry.” She said not looking up from the table. “Niall not hungry? Woah!” Liam laughed. I kept my main glance on September. She was playing with the food with her fork, twirling it around like a 5 year old. I then realised I wasn’t the only one watching September, in fact everyone was staring at her. She didn’t look up the whole time. I would occasionally exchange confused glances with Eleanor and Harry, but otherwise we all were watching her do nothing but sadly look at her meal. About half an hour later everyone left but me and El. “What’s wrong?” I asked. She finally looked up. “Oh, nothing” She said looking empty. “Fallen out with Niall?” El asked “No” She said getting up. “okay, we’re always here if you need a chat you know?” El said sympathetically. She just nodded and went upstairs. “Oh dear, I wonder what’s up?” I said sadly. “Me too.” El replied.


Niall’s P.O.V

September came in and stared at me blankly for a moment or too. I ignored her glance and carried on lying on the bed, not moving an inch. “Niall I-“ She started. “Just leave it, there’s obviously no trust here anymore.” I said angrily and then left the room and went outside for a ‘walk’ to clear my head.  I know I’m being stubborn, but I’m not prepared to admit it yet. Oh god, what’s the point? Why even try if she’s going to be cheating on me? Well, im not 100% sure that’s true.. but I don’t know. Why wouldn’t she, it’s not as if I’m anything special. I need to stop over thinking it, and just talk to her. But would she be honest? I don’t even see the point anymore.


September’s P.O.V

Oh shit. Nialls gone, god knows where, just gone. Left. All because if me. Could I really steal from somebody so sweet and… perfect? Nope. BEEP! BEEP! I heard my phone beep indicating I had a message. Unknown number. My hands started to shake whilst the rest of my body froze. Is that even possible?  I took a deep breath before clicking on the new message. Hurry with the money babycakes. You don’t want to keep me waiting do you? Love the man you wish you had for keeps, ta ra slut. I felt sick to the stomach. He was a constant reminder. Of my past, of what I need to do in order to save lives.. of what my future may be like.. everything. I leant against the wall in hysterics (of crying, not laughter) and felt my body sink to the ground. I continued crying, for so many reasons I was unsure of each of them. I can’t  lose Niall, but if I don’t steal his money we’ll all be dead, and that means losing him, and everyone who’s ever loved me. Or I steal the money, he finds out, and I lose him and everybody. But I can’t let them die?! No. Absolutely not. Why me? As much as I LOVE Niall, it may have been better for everyone if we never met each other again. In that case everyone’s lives would have been safer, and simpler. “Niall.” I barely whispered. Still crying loudly, I just need him. Now. I heard somebody at the bottom of the stairs closing the front door, Niall? He slowly walked in, until he saw the state I was in. He raced over to me, and started panicking. “Whats happened?” “he’s back” Is all I managed to say, but I’d already said too much. Fuck. I couldn’t tell anyone, now look what I’ve done. I am such a mess. “W-who?” He asked confused. “I don’t know.. maybe it was a dream” I lied. “Oh.” He said unsure. “Niall” I whisper “Mm?” he says “Please never leave me again” I cried. His facial expressions turned to sadness and I think guilt. He wrapped his arms tightly. “I’m so sorry babe. I won’t.” He said softly. I decided not to think about anything till tomorrow. Just make the most of the time I have with Niall.

“I love you September.” Niall said holding me in his arms and gently rocking me, like a 3 year old but I loved it. “I love you too, more then you could ever imagine..” I replied. Meaning each word. 

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