The Best of Movellas

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12. The War Of No Hope -The Raven Princess

The War Of No Hope

By The Raven Princess

Category:    Fantasy


Published: 16th May 2013

(All the numbers given below are for the Monday 29th July 2013.)

Likes: 7

Favs: 6

Views: 157

Rating: G

*CURRENTLY ON-GOING STILL*  (Currently having done both a Prologue and Chapters 1-4 on Monday 29th July 2013)


"Every tyrant has to start somewhere. This is the story of how one became one, and fell at the same time..."


 The War of No Hope keeps you on edge the entire way through. No kidding.

 From scary fanged vampires to powerful royalists scaring everyone witless, this is one FAB read. It starts off (SPOILER ALERT) with a dramatic death of -what I assume- to be the main character's mother. This scene is incredibly dramatic and the imagery is great but scary, so I think this is probably not a great story for the faint of heart due to the gore and whatnot. But if you are like me you'll love the fact it doesn't try to disguise and hide up all those gory details, with all the blood and guts. (Don't worry there isn't that much gore just a bit of blood.) What I especially love about this prologue is the length -the fact that it is not too long and overwhelming a prologue to start the readers off- and the final sentence in italics...

'Except, this was no longer a child. She was a woman.'

 I can't begin to say how effective these kind of sentences are in stories, because I think they are vital in a story. Especially when you want to make and point made or make something stand out from the rest of the page. The way The Raven Princess puts this out at the end shows the progression of this girl whom was referred to as the 'young girl' until the end. It shows a change in maturity in the girl after witnessing this terrible event and shows how dramatic this event has been to her.  

 However as much as I love this prologue I have to say I don't so much love the layout of the rest of it. I personally think that the gaps (where things should be on the next line rather than just in one big chunky paragraph) that should have been taken in order to space out her work have not been taken in the right places.  

 One example of what I think should of happen is in the first few sentences...

 Silence. All was still in the courtyard as the woman made her final walk up to the gallows. She held her head high, voluminous skirts trailing in such a way that they seemed to be leaving a trail of blood. Ravens yelled out in protest as she bowed her head for the hangman, the noose a perfect fit for her neck.

Which I think could possibly be changed to be more like this...


 All was still in the courtyard as the woman made her final walk up to the gallows. She held her head high, voluminous skirts trailing in such a way that they seemed to be leaving a trail of blood. Ravens yelled out in protest as she bowed her head for the hangman, the noose a perfect fit for her neck.

  The layout on the whole for The Raven Princess story I think could possibly be improved though. Her story is very intriguing and I love the way she is taking this BUT I think the layout puts the reader completely off it, which is most unfortunate. I think this can be rescued easily though by simply spacing it out more. Some of the more hefty looking paragraphs could possibly be split up into smaller paragraphs to give the reader more gaps and therefore more time for breathers so they can keep up with the story and not get confused. I also think that if maybe The Raven Princess used word or something to make automatic gaps between her paragraphs so there was bigger definition between them. (Which she has actually done on her later chapters but not the earlier ones.)

 I love the direction she is taking her story and it gets you asking all the right questions. (Another SPOILER alert...) The girl is forced to go to this Winterbrook academy after she finds her friend dying and the only way (she is told) that she can save him is to go there. Once she gets there she causes quite the stir and is described as being 'A Natural'. I REALLY WANT TO KNOW WHAT THIS IS! Is she a supernatural being too? The questions just keep piling up and the only way we're gunna get any answers is if The Raven Princess continues on writing so I'm sure she'd really appreciate any views you'd give her and comments for support. 

 But now right now I need to desperately go on to talk about the blurb. (Sorry about the dramatic change in topics here)

 I think that this intriguing read for all but I think that its blurb and front cover (sorry The Raven Princess -I don't mean to offend) doesn't show this story's true nature and don't catch the eye of the reader or even let in to what this story is all about. But I will point out that this is just my personal opinion, so others may and probably will disagree on this. 

 I'm not entirely sure if it is a good thing or not about the smallness of the blurb as I think it probably should include perhaps even a little bit of skeleton piece of information about the baseline of the story to back up the quote.  Because looking at the blurb I wouldn't even begin to think it was even in the slightest related to vampires and whatnot.

 But I LOVE the quote used in the blurb so far though. The quote seems pretty clear cut and 'short and sweet'. It makes me feel really curious as to who this person really is. Why is she a tyrant? How did she become one? (-as it says in the blurb) It gets you asking all the right questions which is probably why the author (The Raven Princess) decided to just leave it at that and not include any more. Which I can understand.

 I like the titles of her chapters! They are pretty good! I especially love the title of her first chapter 'Visit's Of A Deathly Nature' --Sorry just had to be said! Bit random!

 Overall I think I'd recommend this story to people aged 14 and up as it contains pretty strong language and is a Y after all. It is all about a girl who doesn't care much for the rules being a bit of a rebel and I think this will be a kind of adventure/fantasy and for both guys and girls.

 I'm really looking forward to reading more about this girl and how she manages to keep those vampires in check and how this storyline is going to develop. What is this Winterbrook academy? Why do they want her there for? What is a Natural?

So get reading guys! ;-)



Here I'm going to put on a selection of a few comments with the usernames of the people who made them on this bit here. So if you have read this movella and would like to have done one of these short comments here, please message below or find some other way of contacting me!!! :)


Review by:    ToryB

Hullo everyone!!!! Don't you just love a good read no matter what the genre?! SO GET READING THIS STORY NOW!!! 

Toodles! :-)

If you want your movella reviewing too, say so on a comment below!!! :-)

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