Twice the Tomlinson

Keegan's not overly fond of her brother. He left. But now he's back, and he has no idea why she hates him so much. Can he get her to forgive him? And what'll happen when she is sent on tour with him? What happens when 5 Seconds of Summer is thrown into the mix?

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16. Panic

"You alright, Keegs?" I snapped my head up from the menu, my eyes meeting my brother's. 

"Hm?"

"Are you okay? You seem a bit off..." He frowned at me, trying to figure out what was wrong. 

"Oh yeah! I'm fine." I nodded emphatically. He didn't look like he bought it, but returned his gaze to the menu, distractedly rejoining the conversation around him. 

My own eyes wandered back down to the food options, nothing really seeming appealing to my knotted stomach. 

"Is everyone ready to order?" A pretty, blonde waitress stepped up to our table, flashing the boys a smile. They all returned it, eyes fixed to her gorgeous face and body. Typical boys... I rolled my eyes and waited. 

Niall nodded and kicked off the round of ordering. When she got to me, I just shook my head, saying I wasn't hungry as I passed my menu down the table. I got a few odd looks but then Harry, who was sitting next to me, gave his order and the rest of the table followed. 

Once we were finished, the waitress smiled, closed her notepad, retrieved the menus, and walked off towards the kitchen. Harry turned to me slightly, leaning forward and lowering his voice, keeping the conversation between us. "What's going on with you?"

"Nothing." I frowned, confusion coloring my features. "I'm fine." Everybody seemed to be picking up on my off mood.

"Come on, Keegan... Don't lie to me. Why aren't you eating?" His eyebrows were drawn together in concern. 

"I'm just not feeling well, is all. Way more traveling than I'm used to. I, uh, I think I'm just gonna go back to the room and lie down." I smiled slightly and pushed my chair back, standing up. 

"I'm gonna go back to my room," I quietly informed the group, before quickly exiting the restaurant. 

I swiped my key card in the slot, watched the light turn green, heard the lock click, and pushed it open. I closed the door behind me, falling back onto it, just looking at the darkened room. It was so big, so empty. It felt so lonely and cold. Until it didn't. I felt the walls closing in and the temperature begin to rise as my heart rate quickened. I tried to control my breathing, pushing away from the door. I made it to the edge of the bed before collapsing on the floor at the foot, the room spinning around me. Placing the heel of my hands against my eyes, I tried to stop the hot tears from rolling down my cheeks. It was so hard to breathe... I kept gasping for air, my hands moving to my chest. I just needed oxygen... The room spun even more and I tried not to scream. I was hyperventilating by now, struggling to breathe. 

"Keegan?" I heard someone kneel beside me as a pair of arms encircled me. "You're okay. It's okay. Shhh.... Just breathe." The hands rubbed my back, trying to soothe me. I clung to his shirt, crying into his chest. I just wanted air. But my lungs weren't working and my head started spinning. It was a few more seconds before my world went black and I passed out from lack of air. 

*****

I groaned, trying to curl into a ball. "Easy there, Keegan. You're okay." A hand fell onto my shoulder as my side of the bed was weighed down. 

I rolled over, trying to see who was with me. "Ashton?" My voice sounded quiet and far away.

"Hey..." He smiled slightly and I moved to sit up. He helped me, supporting my weight when my muscles wouldn't. "Come here." He moved to sit in the middle of the bed, pulling me onto his lap and into his arms. "Just relax, yeah? You're safe." 

I let my eyes close as I curled into his chest, my hands clinging to his shirt. He quietly chuckled as his arms tightened ever so slightly, his lips placing a soft kiss in my hair. 

"Just get some sleep, kid. You're safe."

My eyes opened and moved to look up at him. "Why aren't you at dinner?" 

"I came to check up on you. We were a little worried."

"We?"

"All of us." 

That shocked me. I never expected nine different people to worry about me. My eyebrows knitted together in a frown. "Okay... But why are you still here?" 

He smiled, shaking his head at me. "Because you needed me. Duh."

I didn't understand why he was being so nice to me. "How long was I out?"

"Maybe 10 minutes?" He shrugged slightly. 

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. "Ashton? You in there?" Luke's accent could be heard through the door. 

"It's open," he called out. I tried to remove himself from his lap but he held me in place. "It's only Luke, babe. Just relax. You need rest."

I just closed my eyes, trying to give him as much privacy as I could. 

"Hey Ash." I heard the door close as Luke entered the room. "She okay?" I could hear the frown. 

I felt Ashton nod. "Yeah, she'll be fine."

"What happened?"

"Panic attack. She passed out."

"She did seem a bit jumpy today. I walked into the bunk cabin and she was collapsed on the floor."

"She what?"

"Yeah... Something's off with her." 

"I know." Ashton's tone was sad.

I shifted in Ashton's arms, trying to put an end to this conversation. 

"Hey pretty girl." Luke's voice was quiet and he crawled onto the bed, sitting near Ashton. 

I opened my eyes and tilted my head to see Luke, a concerned smile plastered on his face. "Hi Luke..." My voice didn't wound any better. 

"Get some rest. You sound like Hell." 

I just shook my head, not wanting to sleep.

"Why not?" Ashton looked down at me. My eyes slid closed as I tried to avoid the question. "Come on Keegan. You can talk to us. I've been where you are before."

My eyes snapped open and I frowned up at him. "Really?"

"Yeah. I was. So talk to me." I looked over at Luke, not sure if I wanted to talk about this with him there. "No, don't look at him; look at me. What's wrong, Keegan? Why won't you sleep."

"Nightmares." My voice was quiet and almost ashamed.

Ashton hugged me to him. "I'll be right here all night, yeah? It's gonna be okay. I promise. I won't let anyone hurt you, and if you wake up, I'll be here for you." 

I nodded, curling into him slightly. "Thanks, Ashton." 

He nodded and again kissed my hair. "Any time. Are you okay if I leave you with Luke to go grab a quick something to eat?" He sounded so unsure.

I quickly sat up, removing myself from his lap. "Of course! Go! Both of you. You guys need food." 

They both laughed at me and Luke informed me that he had already eaten his meal, but that Ashton's was waiting for him at the dinner table. Ashton smiled and hopped off the bed. "I'll be back in a few." He then exited the room, leaving me alone with Luke. 

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