Starless Sky [completed]

After having spend the summer with the Cullens, in LA and with Charlie; Melody gets back to Forks High School. it's a brand new year full of unexpected surprises and things you'd never thought were existing.

After a small incident, things go wrong - Bella gets depressive and Melody runs away.
But what happens if the past all comes flooding back? is there danger lurking?

What if she can't protect her family from herself and the ghosths of her past? And worse.. how will Edward react?

Starless Sky is the sequel to Moon Girl

IMPORTANT:

This story is RATED 18+ / NC-17 which means the following:

- violence
- angst
- cursing
- sexual acts/ suggestive themes

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9. Numbness

Only heard in the room was our fast, erratic breathing, my fast beating heart and a few chaste kisses we shared. We lay there for a while, just breathing, holding onto each other for dear life, during the last minutes we had together before he’d leave.

At some point he murmured something about being too cold and heavy. Apparently I’d started shivering like crazy. Edward pulled out of me and I cringed at the sting from inside. When he rolled off of me, I saw his hand clench the headboard behind him in a vice grip as his breathing fastened once again, but not from arousal.

And that’s when I noticed the warm liquid between my legs.

I was bleeding quite much.

I quickly squeezed my legs together, trying to find a way  to free him from the scent. It was helpless of course, but I had to do something. We obviously never smelled it after he made me lose my virginity. 

“Edward, I’m…”  I began, feeling guilty because he was pained. His pain was my pain now. it was one of the aspects of mating – the connection that’d reach as far as needed.

“No, Melody, don’t. I was expecting it.” he whispered, his voice hoarse, probably not from the screaming he just did. I blushed a bright red for what seemed like the hundredth time that night.

 

I nodded vaguely as realization dawned down on me. We just had sex. Amazing, painful but intoxicating sex. I was no virgin anymore, no little girl any longer. He’d made a woman of me.

 

And after tonight, after we’d shared ourselves in the most beautiful and intimate way possible, it was over. We were over before it had even started. My head began to burn as the tears wanted to break free for another round.

I didn’t want to leave, I never wanted to. But I had too.  I glanced sideways, to the man beside me, still naked, glorious and troubled. His eyes were closed but the tension was very obvious in his face.

It was Edward who pulled me towards Forks in the first place, it was Edward who made my days worth living again after all the horrible words I’d heard from the woman that once gave birth to me. It was Edward that lightened a fire, a fire inside me that would make me do everything to keep him with me, safe. But he had just as quickly extinguished it.

It was time to face reality, the outside world and to think of what was happening outside of the bedroom where we gave ourselves to one another. But not wholly – He wasn’t giving me everything and what I wanted was his cold, stoned heart to love me back.

And he didn’t even know. Edward didn’t know I was his in every way.

 

Unwilling and still raw from the impassioned  moments before, I sat up and left the huge bed, that now was covered I blood and partially broken at the sides. I stifled a gasp at the sight of pieces that were clawed out of the wooden sides. Without looking at him, even though I felt his eyes on me, I started to gather my wet clothes. I blushed crimson when I realized I was standing there, naked in front of him. when I’d gotten my clothes back in my arms, I helplessly stood there, not really knowing what do or to find.

Just when I wanted to face him, I heard his voice from next to me. I was startled by his sudden appearance at my side, covering my breasts and hips with the bunch of material in my hands. A sigh of relief left me, as I saw he’d already hoisted himself into clothes.

“you…you can use my bathroom…if you like to uh…clean yourself up.” he stumbled over the words, something I’d do. I nodded, the redness in my cheeks never leaving. He pointed me in the right direction and let me take my time.

I dried my hair with one of the fluffy towels, and tried to dab at the sore space between my legs. The amount of blood that had left my body was kind of terrifying to see. I slowly dressed, not wanting to, seeing that I knew what was going to happen next. I wanted to make this a precious moment, to cherish it. but there was no time left.

I left the bathroom, looking down at my soaked shoes, and followed Edward’s feet as we silently left the house. On his way down, Edward turned off all the lights.

My heart squeezed painfully in my chest.

 

Outside, it was still raining, as we descended the porch steps into the darkness. Edward turned towards me, closing the distance between us for the one last time. enclosing his hand around my face, he looked me deeply in the eyes.

“I’m so sorry.” He whispered, pain evident in his tone. I whimpered.

He lips touched mine as I closed my eyes, wanting to remember the feel of rose petals when they’d leave me.

A rush of air, made my eyes flutter as his lips were absent.

Like a ghost, he was gone. Gone into the darkness. Without me.

 

‘With a kiss of desire on the lips’

I expected the tears, the panic attack and everything that one would do when the reason of one’s existing left. But it never came. The tears were not there, like I’d cried enough. But I felt like I could cry more than ever before. I didn’t panic, or scream. I didn’t even made any move to follow him – I knew I could catch up with him, I was fast enough. but it didn’t.

                All I felt was the agonizing numbness spreading throughout my body. The same body that had been set on fire moments earlier. Only the tingles from numbness that settled underneath my skin, were left of him. 

                I just stood there, unmoving and getting soaked through the bone. I listened to my heart that was beating, but there was no sign of the fast erratic and panicking rhythm. it beat peacefully, like there was nothing wrong at all.

                Every single damn thing went wrong. All of it.

 

                I was lonely, cold and the words he’d last spoken to me cut through me like a large, razor sharp knife full of flesh hooks. ‘I’m sorry’ was the only thing he’d said.

 

                I was done here. I could stay there, wait or do nothing, but it wouldn’t solve any problems or heartache.

                Like automatically, I turned and ran, without blinking my eyes back to Charlie. Not home – Edward was my home. With every step in the dirt laying on the forest grounds, I felt the scorching pain rushing through my veins. The pain was almost unbearable. Strange since I didn’t seem to realize anything of it. It hurt with every move to feel the distance, the separation and the thought of being away from him. Especially after we’d made love, like that.

                It was everything to me. even the pain was perfect. Like it was a sign that we were going to face this – separation.

                I felt my body taking on a slower pace, a human pace. My eyes saw the familiar street where I lived. My ears heard the loud voices from the people that were surrounding the house, in search for Bella.

                I came closer, starting to realize what was happening as I felt a single tears brush over my left cheek.

                He was gone.

                At that moment I felt my mind connecting with my limp body again. my breathing, increased just as my heartbeat. Soft sobs of desperation left my throat. My lungs constricted, making it difficult to breath. My legs and arms started to get wobbly as my head felt light. Like I was flying somewhere above it.

 

                I stood in front of the house, stopping myself. There’s a whole commotion ranging in the front yard. A lot of men, busy with radio receiving, phoning, talking and thinking strategies. Bella was still missing. I didn’t know how much time passed since Charlie spoke with me.

                ‘Oh god! Melody!’

                Jacob saw me, and ran up to me as my sight blurred from the tears. I didn’t want him to hold me! he didn’t have a right too! I wanted to tell him, to run away. But the only thing I remembered, was a loud, heart wrenching horrific scream and some whimpering, Jacob running up to catch me and Charlie’s thoughts. ‘She just found out.’  before everything around me faded into darkness, taking me with it.

 

                It was the one thing he didn’t want, where he left me for, but he did after all, without knowing.

                Edward Cullen killed me. Killed me by taking my shattered heart with him.

 

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