BELIEVE

Well, this is my first story and I wanted to call it BELIEVE because I'm sure life revolves around believing.

'A moving, inspirational and beautiful tale about a special girl...'

It is about an ordinary girl called Anna-Marie who is a shy, ambitious girl who really wants to reveal herself to the whole world - show everyone who she really is inside and tell people what she has to say. I write in her shoes about her life and what goes on around and inside her. This story tells you about how she grows as a person, knowing more about life and herself. Just an average girl just like any other girl, but there is something in Anna-Marie that is dying to get out! Her true self!

Read this book to uncover this truly magical story...


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3. My Normal Life

I wake up and I'm just in an ordinary world.

There's nothing special about life now. Even though how reluctant I am to get up, I do. I had my first day school today so there was no escaping. I looked around and there was my sister, Laura, snoring her head off, lying awkwardly on the bed. One leg dangling off the end. I had to say, my sister is a very interesting person. There are days when I stop and think about her. Is she from another planet? However, I love her anyway.

 I drag myself from my bed and snatch my shower cap and pink towel and have a warm shower. I couldn't believe it! I was already starting secondary school, it all went so fast. I was in primary school but now I was going to start a bigger, better but scarier new experience for me. I'm not weird or anything but the shower was always the place where I reflected on my thoughts and new ones. The big thought was school. There could have been other small things rushing through my mind but this big one was overruling them. I mean, I was worried about school because there was tons of things that drove me crazy. These things were stuff such as 'would the kids like me?', 'would I make any friends?' and 'would I be able to be myself?'. These thoughts bashed against my head so violently that I forgot I was in the shower. I was lost.

I quickly jumped out and immediately changed into my brand new uniform. I felt unusual like I wasn't myself. As I stared into the body-length mirror, something didn't feel right - I definitely wasn't myself. I knew I wasn't. I had to do something but there wasn't really any point, my mum would have a right go at me. I didn't want to go there. I was too self-conscious: I had very skinny ankles and legs, my arms looked too muscular for a girl, I had bushy eyebrows and my nose was massive. I was probably one of my most self-critical person in the whole world.

Time flew. I was already about to get out the car and become sucked into the breath-taking experience. The Jack Hutton Newman School; it was a Roman Catholic school so it was fairy religious. I was bought up a Roman Catholic and so, of course, a Roman Catholic school.

I threw my heavy backpack over my right shoulder, held my breath and walked slowly towards my form room after waving goodbye to my mum. I wasn't the only one - my big brother, Will, walked by me. He was in year eleven at the time so, obviously he knew where he was going.  Every step closer was equivalent to a ton of gut-wrenching fear. All I had to do was walk. 'Seriously, Anna-Marie, how hard can it be?' I kept saying this to myself however on the other side, there were reasons for it being too hard. I felt like I had bigger people on my back, commenting on every move I did. I literally felt like everyone at school were staring at me, pointing at me, emphasizing my weird difference compared to others. In fact, no one was there insulting me or anything like that. It was me, I was the one criticizing myself.

 

Finally, I was safe. Safe in my class seat. I looked around with my huge eyeballs and tried to blend in with my surroundings. I was really bad at this. The other girls and boys in the class all knew each other; they were laughing and talking with one another. Then me? I just sat there, my patterned kilt just below my knees and my over-sized navy blazer hanging off me. It really hurt to think twenty-six pupils out of two hundred of us in the year didn't know anyone here. No one here went to their primary schools. My mind went to another thing - I was one of those people. So, it killed me when I thought about this even more.

Sadness wrapped round me as fear punched me in the stomach. The clock ticked. Tick, tock. Tick, tock. Over and over again. I really despised this feeling and the awkwardness that lay with me. I was also pretty sure that one of the kids noticed me and said something that would hurt me but however, they had the choice just to ignore my presence. All of a sudden, when it struck twenty-five to nine, the bell rang.  The other kids rushed to their seats as our form tutor, Mrs. Gilliarto would soon take registration.

Amongst all the children, a girl, just a bit shorter than me, took her seat beside me. The girl was a dirty blonde and her hair was tied back into a ponytail that reached her little shoulders. Her hands were tucked away and hid under her thighs and so, of course, I could tell she was a bit shy. She reminded me of myself - except, I wasn't a blonde and didn't have cute blue eyes like she did. I wish.  ''Try to make friends by making small talk, it's the only way''. This is what my mother said to me while she combed through my hair this morning. And so, I did.               

'I like your hair', I said softly.                                                                                                        '

Thanks', she replied.                                                                                                                

That obviously got somewhere. 'Thanks for the help, Mum!' I thought. I couldn't believe how hard it was just to give someone a compliment. It requires a lot of confidence - if you're like me. I was just a timid, self-conscious girl. Did I actually think I would make a friend for who I am?

That day, those seven hours were the longest seven hours of my life. I didn't go outside, I didn't make any friends. Except with the big brown chair I sat on in the corner of the library for the whole day. It was raining that day as I walked home. The weather was a pure reflection of how my day went. Of course, I was miserable, I was sad,  but I wasn't going to let that get in my way.

Because of my book - 'My Special 13'. In My Special 13 were all my thoughts, advice and notes to help me to help me through this life. This beautiful 'notebook' was given to me on April 13th, my birthday.On that birthday, I knew this was a new turning point for me and it was practically a whole new life for me. I did not share it with anyone, I kept it to myself. Just me and my Special 13. Almost every weekend, I would write and express my thoughts. It was the only way I could...just cope with everything going on. It was buried and hidden beneath me, where it could never get out and reveal itself...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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