Forever free

It's summer 1952. The girl, Caroline Headings, seems to have a perfect life. Enough money, caring parents and a nice boyfriend. You couldn't be more wrong. Her parents are strict and joyless and is like everybody else racists. Caroline can't stand her boyfriend and there's nothing she hates more then the sociaty.
The only thing thats keep her standing is Joseph. Her secret true love. And even though she wont admit it, she loves him more than anything else. When her parents said she wasn't allowed to see him, she did anyway. Just so she could stay alive. But when he's called in for the Korean war, he has to leave Caroline. Filled with sorrow Caroline abandons her family to find out what freedom and happiness is. She and Joseph agrees that they will meet the year after at the place they first met.


1. The festival

It was the summer of 1952. The sky was absolutely blue, with not a cloud in sight, and the sun burned relentless down on the melting asphalt. Young girls with knee-long pastel dresses and curly hair walked up and down the streets, companied by friends, family or boyfriends holding their bags, or dragging their bike. Everybody was heading for this years festival. A festival that was loved by almost every single person, young or old. Usually it was loved least as much by the Headings, but this year something was changed. The youngest daughter, Caroline Heading, had changed drastically, if she should say so her self. She couldn’t see the point in any of these things anymore. And even though she still had the same dark blonde hair, the same light-brown eyes and the same teasing smile, she had realised something. And that day, when the family was wondering down the warm street, she couldn’t stop thinking about it.

She fidgeted with her dress as she sat down on a bench, while her father went up the small path that led to Mary’s house. Mary, or the Johnsons, lived just a couple of streets away from their own house. Today the garden was brown and dry because of the heat, and their old garden-man walked futile around with a garden hose, trying to save the already dead flowers.

Caroline felt kind of bad for him. She felt a sudden need to get up and tell him that it wasn’t necessary and then make him drink some water instead. But she knew how her mother would react to it, and today wasn’t the time, thinking of what she was about to do.

When her dad returned, he wasn’t followed by any member of the Johnsons. He looked slightly confused when he got to the three ladies waiting for him.

‘’They wasn’t home.’’ He explained and looked around.

Suddenly a hoarse, old voice sounded:’’ I should say that the Johnsons are waiting for you at the swimming area.’’ Throughout the whole time he talked to them, he was facing the ground. Not daring to look into her fathers eyes. Sweat dripped down from his grey hair, down his brown skin and into his eyes, making Caroline wonder how he could still keep them open.

‘’Alright.’’ My father answered stiff, and then continued down the street. Before following him, Caroline smiled at the old man. Her father didn’t even have the decency to say thanks.

‘’Did you remember to pack the bathing suits?’’ Her moms shrilling voice sounded:’’ And the present. Did you remember the present, William?’’

‘’Of course if remembered the present, Margaret!’’ He answered more harshly then he used to. Today was a very special day at the festival. At least for most of the Headings. Their son, James, Caroline’s older brother, was finally returning from his education. To be honest, she wasn’t thrilled about it. James was a small, broad man. He had much lighter hair than Caroline, and his eyes were smaller and meaner. Caroline never liked the way the atmosphere changed whenever he entered the room. It just got much cooler. She wasn’t looking forward for him to return at all.


The noises were extremely loud when the family got to the festival. Screams, laughter and a few understandable words filled the air. Caroline felt stuck, and she could feel how the claustrophobic feeling slowly grew inside her. A girl ran into her, and pushed her to the side, causing that she almost got candyfloss in her hair. A group of young, handsome guys, laughed at each other a couple meters away and Caroline would’ve have walked right over to them if it wasn’t for one very important reason. Caroline leaned up the candyfloss stand, and let his face fill her mind. The beautiful, dark-blonde curly hair, his blue eyes, his soft lips. For a while she completely forgot about all the craziness she hated so much, and just thought about him. But her mom got that ruined fast too.

‘’Caroline! Caroline, don’t you ignore me!’’ She scolded, and dragged me up in front of her.

‘’You know I don’t like when you act that way!’’

‘’Act how?’’ She answered, truly confused about what she did wrong this time.

‘’When you don’t act like a proper girl.’’ Her mom said, before she pushed Caroline towards a group of blurry humans. When she got closer, she found out that it was somebody she couldn’t stand talk to right now. She felt like a mess, surrounded by all the things she hated. False people, false friends, well even false boyfriends. The only person she felt was true was him. And he wasn’t here to save her right now.

Actually she hated the way she needed him. She didn’t like the way he meant so much for her life. How he could change so many things. She liked it much better when she was just playing with feelings and pretty boys, but still she couldn’t stand loosing him.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Roberts face moving toward hers. For a short while Caroline didn’t know what was happening, but then she remembered: She was still playing with one, not so pretty, boy. Robert. Another broad, strong young fellow with light hair, blue eyes and a huge baby-face, just like the rest. The only person she was glad to see was Mary.

Caroline instantly ran over and hugged her. Her brown hair was all wet and she held her red bathing suit in the right hand. She laughed with her usually sweet laughter, and hugged Caroline back. Throughout the whole time, Robert didn’t let go if her hand, and when they walked around between all the stands and amusements he didn’t either.

By the time they stopped, Caroline was beginning to feel kind of captured.

They were walking by the old hullabaloo house, when Mary suddenly came up beside her and whispered in her ear:’’ Joseph’s waiting for you.’’

She smiled and continued:’’ Don’t you worry, hun’. I’ll watch out for you while you play with you new boytoy.’’

Caroline needed to say that he wasn’t a boytoy. In fact Robert was, but she stopped herself. It wasn’t the time.

‘’Uhm…’’ Caroline started:’’ I need to go to the toilet.’’

‘’Now?’’ Robert asked, trying to take her hand again.

‘’Yes, I really need to.’’

‘’C’mon, let’s try the carousel first.’’

‘’For god sake, Robert! Let the girl go to the toilet!’’ Mary laughed, and grabbed his arm, so he got a little further away from me.

‘’Alright then.’’ He laughed confused:’’ We’ll meet you at the restaurant with your parents!’’

Caroline nodded silently, while she got warmer and warmer inside. She was about to burst when Mary winked at her and disappeared around the corner with Robert. She turned around and found herself lost between all these strangers just rushing by. She quietly asked:’’ Joseph?’’ She walked along the wall, and down to the back of the hullabaloo house. Here were no people, beside a scary looking clown, emptying a beer. Caroline sneaked by him and continued along the house. She had almost given up when something caught her eye. A little locket shined up on her from the dirty ground. Inside it was a picture of her and Joseph that was taken before her parents forbid her to see him. She smiled, picked it up and then whispered into the dark room behind the open door:’’ Joseph?’’ No answer, but a weird scrambling sounded from the room.

‘’Joseph you fool, this isn’t funny!’’

Caroline started walking into the room, when someone suddenly grabbed her arm and dragged her in. Short time after, she found herself leaning up against Joseph strong chest. He smiled his crooked smile down at her, and made her feel absolutely happy.

‘’Missed me?’’ He asked, while his fingers touched her face softly.

‘’Not really.’’ She lied, and kissed his finger as it passed her mouth.

‘’ Oh, well. I didn’t miss you either.’’ He teased as his face got closer.

Caroline ran her hands through his soft, curly hair before leaning in and finally got what she had hungered for the whole day. When his soft lips touch her, the warmth that she knew too well, filled her body with joy, and made her want more. She pressed her lips against his as it got more intense. He ran his rough fingers down her naked bag and pulled her in. Oh, how she wished this moment would never end. When their bodies were entwined, and she could feel his heartbeat she felt completely alive. She could feel his breath on her neck, when they fell down on the blanket he had placed there. Her lips were parted in a big smile, as she again and again kissed his face. It seemed as she was afraid of letting go, and behind her shiny eyes, you could see how frightened she was for returning to her real life.

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