Wanting What's Wrong

Two years have passed since Sophie Miller escaped. Two years since she was One DIrections private possession. Trying to get her life back to normal, Sophie heads to Mullingar. The boys of One Direction find her and drag her back into their messed up lives. Feelings start showing here and there, making Sophie confused. Is it really okay to start having feelings towards your kidnappers? Afterall, there is a very thin line between love and hate...


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32. Silence

The visit of a nurse and a dose of morphine later, Harry comes back with the food. We eat and talk, and Harry helps me write new papers to place inside Padgett, my left-handed writing being completely unreadable.

Towards nine o’clock, Harry shuts the light and lies in the bed with me, in a spooning position. I don’t oppose, due to the fact that the hospital bed is way too small to have two bodies lie side by side. Plus, I feel safer in his arms. Harry’s breath is hot in my neck, the steady movement of his chest rising and falling behind me soothing me even more.

“Aren’t you gonna sing me to sleep?” I mumble, yawning as I shut my eyes. “I let you in my bed.”

“What do you want me to sing?” He whispers back, pressing a soft kiss at the nape of my neck.

“Anything.”

 

Same bed, but it feels just a little bit bigger now
Our song on the radio, but it don't sound the same
When our friends talk about you all that it does is just tear me down
Cause my heart breaks a little when I hear your name
And it all just sound like uh, uh, uh

Hmmm too young, too dumb to realize
That I should have bought you flowers and held your hand
Should have gave you all my hours when I had the chance
Take you to every party cause all you wanted to do was dance
Now my baby is dancing, but she's dancing with another man.

 

I’m almost sleeping; his soft words making me sink deeper into slumber as his fingers rub small, tender circles on my stomach.

My pride, my ego, my needs and my selfish ways
Caused a good strong woman like you to walk out my life
Now I never, never get to clean up the mess I made
And it haunts me every time I close my eyes
It all just sounds like uh, uh, uh, uh

 

“Soph are you still awake? I need to tell you something...” He nudges me softly.

I deepen my respiration, wanting to see if Harry’ll tell me anyways if I act asleep.

“Soph?”

 It’s silent for what seems for long minutes. I almost give in to sleeping, until I hear him speak.

“Sophie Miller. I love you.” He mumbles quietly, playing with a strand of my hair. “And I’m so sorry for what I’ve done in the past. I really wish I was more like Niall. And that’s why I think you should forgive him. All I’ve done certainly adds up to this mistake of his... And you’ve forgiven me. So for his sake, for the boys’ sake, for my sake and even your sake... I think you should forgive him. And I know I’m a coward right now, not telling you directly since you’re asleep, but I needed you to hear it. Niall needs you more than I do. I think I could live if you weren’t with me... but I don’t think he could. And because I love him, I need you to be with him.” He sighs into my neck, hugging me closer to him. “You need to be with him.” Harry mutters.

Something wet trickles on my neck and Harry whimpers. Goosebumps rise on my skin. Is Harry crying?

“And now look at me. I’m crying.” He sniffs, confirming my doubt. “I’m such a wuss,” He mumbles in disbelief, his curls tickling my neck. He sighs and the weight on the bed shifts.

I shiver as his body warmth leaves with him, and stay motionless as Harry carefully gets off the bed completely, lifting what I had for a blanket back up to cover my shoulders. I hear him leave, the sound of the door opening and closing indicating his departure. Rapidly, I open my eyes and sit up.

“Harry?” I whisper, walking to the door. I open it. “HARRY?” I whisper a little louder. There’s no response, the hallway being empty. “Harry.” I whine. He’s gone. Why? Hugging myself, I walk back to my bed, close my eyes and lay down.

It takes me a long time to sleep. I just couldn’t. I felt too alone, even if nurses kept checking on my ‘sleeping’ form once in awhile. Plus, I couldn’t get Harry's speech out of my head. And when I finally manage to sleep, Harry still isn’t back.

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