Wanting What's Wrong

Two years have passed since Sophie Miller escaped. Two years since she was One DIrections private possession. Trying to get her life back to normal, Sophie heads to Mullingar. The boys of One Direction find her and drag her back into their messed up lives. Feelings start showing here and there, making Sophie confused. Is it really okay to start having feelings towards your kidnappers? Afterall, there is a very thin line between love and hate...


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43. Harry

The clock seems to mock me as the minutes linger. My hands grow clammy and wet as I start stressing out. I try to get a hold of myself as clock strikes 10:55. In 5 minutes. Why would you even stress? You’re plan is about to work perfectly no?

“But somehow, I don’t wanna lose Harry forever.” I whisper to myself, shutting my eyes. Why did emotions get in the way in the first place? Maybe I’m in better condition than two years ago, but at least it was way simpler back then. Stupid feelings. Stupid hormones. Stupid everything.

11:00 o’clock strikes. I stay frozen in bed, unable to move. I don’t wanna go back to Louis’s room... I’m secure in Niall’s arms right now, why walk head first in the lion’s den? Maybe Harry won’t even come to fetch me after all? Maybe he’ll let me stay with Niall? Maybe he won’t snap...

Just as I shut my eyes to try to sleep with this idea in mind, I jolt forwards alertly, the door brusquely opening to reveal a fuming Harry.

“Sophie get―!”

“Shhh!” I bravely silence Harry’s shout, motioning Niall’s sleeping figure. “Don’t wake him. Please shhh.” I murmur pleadingly. I didn’t want Niall to get into what I had created with my plan, that last one which was about to turn to a horrible mess in matter of minutes, maybe seconds.

“Come. Here. Now.” He commands lowly while beckoning me forwards, his green orbs piercing holes in my skin.

Carefully, I unravel Niall’s arms from around me, my breathing steady and wary. I freeze as he stirs, my head whipping in his direction to see if he’s awake.

He breathes loudly, but shows no sign of awakening. Wow he’s out like a light. My pulse slows in relief at the realisation, but accelerates when I see Harry’s murderous look.

“Harry promise you won’t wake him up, and I’ll come.” I say quickly but quietly, standing up from Niall’s bed.

His look hardens, looking me up and down. Oh right I’m in Niall’s shirt and boxers...

“You are in no position to discuss anything. Don’t make me come and get you Soph. You want Niall out of this? Get. Out. Of. His. Fucking. Room. Now.” He separates each of his words precisely, his tone leaving absolutely no place for negotiation.

My head turns to the blonde in question. He stirs, letting out a loud sigh as he turns around. Luckily, his eyes are still shut but I can tell he’s not into a very deep sleep.

“Shhh! Quiet down!” I beg. Shaking, I leniently start to move, my brain working in slow-motion out of fright.

 “You don’t get to order me around. Don’t make me repeat myself. I’ve given you too many chances today. Get your ass here now.” Harry says again, seething. I swear if looks could kill, I’d be a puddle of blood on the floor by now.

I walk to him slowly, head hung low. Harry grips my arm tightly as soon as I’m close enough, jerking me to him. The curly-haired boy then harshly tugs me out of Niall’s room, shutting the door behind him.

He stays dangerously silent as he drags me through the corridor and over to his own room, shoving me inside. I stumble and almost fall at the force of his push, but I slow my fall, catching myself on his bed before dropping down to crumple on the floor. I flinch at the contact of my ass and the ground, momentarily reminiscing what Louis had done less than an hour ago. And he did that why? Because Harry wouldn’t and couldn’t apparently, punish me. Punish me why? I messed up his room...I look around instinctively, registering the fact that he cleaned his room, the dresser now gone and the bed made. So he won’t sleep in my bed tonight apparently. And I won’t either by the look on his face.

I stare up at him, but he doesn’t talk, eyes fixed on me, lips pressed in a tight line.

“Say something please.” I mumble after a couple minutes.

“I have one question for you. A simple question. But I want an honest answer.” He demands firmly.

“Wh―”

Without warning, the older boy hauls me up and on the bed and he places himself over me, hand covering my mouth as his gaze plunged into mine.

“Har―”

“No don’t talk just yet.” Harry shuts his eyes briefly, reopening them as he takes a deep breath. “I’m restraining from giving you what you really deserve, because somehow, and I’ve told you many times before so it’s not like you don’t know, but somehow I’ve grown to care deeply about you. Nothing foreign there? You knew that, right sweet cheeks?” He coos in a sickly sweet tone, one of his thumbs caressing my face.

“I―” He presses his left hand harder on my mouth.

“Don’t talk. Please. Just shake your head yes or no.” Harry demands harshly, speaking between clenched teeth.

I nod my head up and down. Of course I knew he had feelings for me. He practically told me all day.

“Then why,” he swallows thickly, before pursuing, “Are you so cruel?” He finishes, his features void of emotion. I frown, but Harry continues talking, apparently not expecting an answer as he keeps his hand firmly pressed against my lips. “Have you made up your mind already? It’s going to be Niall huh? He’s your prince charming? He’s the one who swept you off your feet?” He mocks. “Would you be willing to make a family with him one day?”

I try to respond against his hand.

“N―”

“I said don’t talk! Don’t even try!” He pleads, his green orbs turning darker. “You leave me absolutely no chance these days, no matter how nice I try to be, you disobey me, provoke me and do all the things that might eventually result into me tearing your head off!” Harry exclaims heatedly, on the brim of tears. “You give me no fucking chance to prove how right I can be for you, because you’re so stuck on Niall! Why are you so cruel, dangling him in front of me like that, even when knowing how I felt about you? Why does it have to be me you have to hate hmm? Why me? Why are Niall’s feelings worth more than mine? Why is Niall always your first choice?” He whispers, his eyes now filled with water.

I can’t help feeling pity for the curly-haired boy as pulls his mop of curls in desperation, clearly on the verge of screaming.

“I know I told you I wanted you to be with him at the hospital but I realise that I don’t think I could survive either if you’re not with me. I’d be lost without you Sophie. Why are you so callously blind?!” He hits the wall behind my head, shutting his eyes. “Can’t you see I’m trying so hard not to hurt you?” He speaks softly. “Oh right but the thing is, thinking about Niall once more, you want me to fucking hurt you!” Harry starts yelling again while all I can’t do is stay silent, every thought in my mind going into overdrive and giving me a headache. “Why do you want to hate me so bad? What have I done to deserve this?!” A lone tear trickles on his cheek but he rapidly wipes it away with the back of his hand, before looking down at me in wonder. “Why can’t you give me the opportunity to prove myself Sophie? It’s all I’m asking you. An occasion to show you how much I love you. I want you to stop wanting to hate me.” He murmurs, cupping my face with his free hand. “Are you gonna give me this chance?” He finally retrieves his other hand from my mouth, expecting an answer.

Truth. Only word that could rightfully summarize Harry’s word vomiting. He was right... I had been blind.

I’m speechless, my mind buzzing as I try to figure out something to answer.

“I uh I...Well um I-I yeah.”

“Please say something coherent at least?” He begs.

“What kind of... chance... do you want exactly?” I separate my words carefully.

“I want to spend one day alone with you. One special day, just for us two. I’ve kept postponing our date because it was clear you didn’t want it, but I really want to have a day alone with you. It would mean a lot to me. To have you all to myself for 24 hours.”

“When?”

He sighs and it’s as if a huge weight has been lifted off his back.

“Any day, as long as it is before the Christmas vacations. But please... just don’t make me wait too long... I don’t like it. And also... I’d like it if you stopped wanting to hate me. Unless if it’s to get some rough sex, but please warn me of your little brat stunts beforehand?”

“You’re getting cocky pretty quickly.” I remark.

“You have no idea how it feels to be free of what I just told you.” He says, bending down to kiss my forehead. “But you promise me for that one day?”

“I promise.”

He sighs, standing from the bed before removing his shirt and trousers.

“Can I sleep in my room? Please?” I say in a small voice.

“Nope. I said you’d sleep in my room. And that you weren’t going to eat breakfast. I’m staying firm on this.”

“But―”

“No buts. You wanted me to punish you initially? Well that’s just what I’m doing. And you can’t deny that for trashing my room, you deserve at least that.”

“You slapped me.”

He very visibly flinches, the next words coming out of his mouth in complete sincerity.

“About that... I am so sorry Sophie I was just so pumped and I couldn’t manage to tell you what I just said and I just lost control... Want me to kiss it better?”

“S’okay I’m not a child.” I huff.

Harry slides under his covers and looks at me, waiting for me to imitate him.

“Is it gonna be for soon or next year?” The green-eyed boy asks casually, patting the bed. I eye it warily, looking back and forth between his bed and my bedroom just a few meters away.

“Sophie please, don’t even think about it....”

“Can I just go get Padgett?”  I ask.

“And you say you’re not a child.” He rolls his eyes.

“Harry, you know, of all people, what Padgett means to me. Count yourself lucky. Even Niall doesn’t know about his contents.”

“Hmm. Yeah go get the turtle if you want.” He acknowledges carelessly.

I nod, hopping off his bed and out the door to my room. I grab the turtle by the leg and bring it back with me to Harry’s room. I slip into the covers with Harry and weirdly, he doesn’t try to spoon me. He snaps his fingers and the lights shut.

“Good old Harry doesn’t change much concerning technology as I see...”

“Shhh I wanna sleep. I had an emotionally charged day, just like you, and I’d like to rest. And I’m not old by the way. I’m younger than Niall if you recall correctly.” His deep raspy voice mumbles in the dark.

A couple seconds pass, and I decide to talk again.

“You know... I didn’t go to Niall’s room to provoke you earlier. He had heard me scream while I was with Louis, and he saw us and then he just took me with him. He was just looking out for me...” I say softly.

“But you knew you’d be hitting a cord with me.” He says a matter-of-factly. “You knew that letting Niall take you to his room would tick me off.”

“Yeah but I regretted it afterwards.”

“You did?”

“Harry I care for you much more than I actually show it.” I sigh, letting my head sink into the pillow.

“Well that’s good to know... It’s a bit like me lusting for you more than I actually let it show.”

“I don’t think you’re hiding anything related to lust.” I chuckle, teasing him a bit.

“Oh really?” he comes closer to me, his hand wrapping itself around one of my thighs provocatively. “You really have no idea how hard I wanted to bang you when I discovered you had destroyed my room. And let’s not talk about when I found you with a sleeping Niall earlier tonight. I would’ve taken you right there, beside a sleeping Niall, if it weren’t for my self-control. I would’ve shoved something in your mouth to keep you quiet, to make sure you wouldn’t wake Niall when I’d make you orgasm harder than you ever had before and that only with my fingers...”

“Please I wanna sleep.” I groan, trying to ignore the images he had just created.

“So Louis’s theory was right... Dirty talk turns you on.”

I can practically hear his smirk through his tone.

“Night Harry.” I mutter.

“Sweet dreams Sophie.”

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