Forever Alone ~COMPLETE~

~ boys arent famous~My name is Tyler Marie Newman. I am 19 years old. When I was 14 I lost both my parents and my 10 year old sister in a car wreck. I have recently moved to London to start my career as a photographer. But lets start with the day I met the man I was going to love forever. Little did I know forever would end quicker then I thought.

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23. Goodbye for Good

Tylers POV

I stood up from the toilet and wiped my mouth with the towel. I ve been sick for a whole week now. ive only seen Niall once this entire week. luckily hes been busy too. I looked at myself in the mirror. I dont look bad I just feel bad. I started to dig through my cabinet to find some medicine when I spotted my monthly products. thats weird i havent even opened them yet. but I bought them a month ago?  I pulled out my phone to see the date and I froze. Im a week and a half late. thats not like me at all. I started to panic as I tried remembering what I did a couple weeks ago. then it hit me... Niall ... we had sex but.. but he had protection. unless it broke. I went into my bedroom and dug in my closet. I always had a pregnancy test in my suit case. I just never took it out.  I went to the bathroom and followed the instructions perfectly. now I just have to wait a few minutes. the next few minutes felt like hours the seconds ticking away ever so slowly. finally the timer went off and I grabbed the test. I looked down at the stick. no.... "no no no shit" I said the test read  +  positive. I heard knocking at my door. who could that be?  i threw the test away and went to answer the door. "Niall?" I breathed out as he stood there in front of me. he looked tired and a little upset. "hi tyler" he gave me a small smile but it didnt reach his eyes. I motioned for him to come in. we sat on the couch an uncomfortable silence fell between us. what was I supposed to say to him. Ive been avoiding you like the plague because I love you and oh yeah im carrying your baby. I heard him cough next to me. I looked at him and he reached forward tucking a hair behind my ear. "how are you?" he asked. "im good. how are you?" he looked like shit but I wasnt going to say anything. "ok" I looked around the room. I felt his hand find mine and he held it. "Tyler was it wrong of me to tell you I love you?" I was shocked at how straight forward he was being. I looked him in the eyes. his beautiful orbs staring into mine. "n-no" I said stuttering a little. His features softened a little. he didnt look as worried. "then why have you been avoiding me." I looked away. but I felt his hand under my chin making me look at him again. tears started forming in my eyes. "dont cry babe" he said as he wiped one away. "I - i just cant" he looked at me confused. "cant what?" he asked. "dont you love me?" I looked down again. "yes i love you" he lifted my face and pressed his lips agianst mine. my stomach did flips at the contact. I pulled away. "Niall I cant" he looked hurt at what I said. "i dont understand?" he said I little quieter. "I cant lose you. and it just seems I lose everyone that I do love." he held my face in his hands and stared into my eyes. "i wont leave you and you wont lose me. eveything thats happened has just been horrible things that i wish you didnt have to go through. but i promise im not going any where." I started to cry. he just pulled me into his arms. "shhh its ok" I cried harder. god my emotions were a wreck. finally after awhile I calmed down. I have to tell Niall about his baby. I looked up at Niall and he smiled at me. "Niall I have to tell you something" he looked at me and smiled but I could see he wass a little confused as well. "Niall im ... really hungry" he started to laugh. "ok let me make you something." I mentally slapped myself. Tyler  why didnt you tell him. ugh... I stood up and followed him to the kitchen.

It was night time and Niall was staying at my house. we layed in bed and snuggled. I missed him so much. looking at the clock it read 11:12 pm. I was so tired and the only thoughts going through my head was to run. my mind was at war with myself. and I was starting to get a headache. I heard Nialls snoring moments later. I got out of bed and went to my closet. what am I doing. how can I do this to him again. not only that but im also carrying his baby. I began to pack a bag quietly. once my bag was packed I walked back into the bedroom. I went up to Niall and kissed him softly  itook one last look at his face. this time I will leave for good. this time he wont ever find me. I went to the kitchen and decided to write him a letter. setting the letter on the table when i was through I walked out of my flat. i didnt turn around. I didnt stop walking I just went to the train station taking the farthest train I could. as I sat on the train it began to go and I turned around and looked out the window for a minute. I watched as Mullingar disapeared through the trees and then I could see nothing more. I faced forward and shut my eyes.

I was doing the right thing

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