Turn This Around

He was beautiful, like an angel, handsome like a god, but what he possessed within was frightfully dark, dangerous and deceiving. You look into his eyes and you're staring into hell itself and you realise he is the demon in which haunts you in you're sleep.

When Natalie Carter, the new girl in town catches the eye of the biggest asshole in school she soon discovers she's going to need more than a feisty attitude and snarky come backs to get rid of the male who stalks her. Challenged with school, making friends and trying to find her place in the world, she really doesn't need Harry Styles on her plate. Harry Styles was not good, in fact he was far from it. He was a demonic creature who had crawled from the fiery pits of hell in Natalie Carters eyes.

There is no escape once your being hunted.

159Likes
417Comments
130090Views
AA

74. Chapter Sixty-Six

My heart hammered intensely against my ribs, eyes growing wide with shock. I could feel my muscled clench, contorting into knots until my body became so rigid that I couldn't so much as lift a finger. It wasn't the initial fall that had stunned me to the point of stiffness. It was the woman who had sent me stumbling in the first place.

A heavy weight seemed to have fallen upon my chest and a dull ache had settled over my heart. Never in a million years had I thought I would end up in this position, staring up at this person with wide eyes and a pang of pain in my chest. I didn't know whether to feel anger or pity towards this women but one thing I was certain of was that I had some how come face to face with one of the monsters in Harry's life...

Gemma.

The resemblance between the two was undeniable. She was beautiful, just like her brother. Long strands of light, honey coloured hair fell around her face as she stooped over me. She held great resemblance to Harry in the face but there was one aspect of her that set her aside from him.

Her eyes.

Gemma's eyes were a deep, brown, set somewhere between a harsh tone and a friendly one. Unlike Harry's beautiful green eyes that could hold both a softness and a harsh glare her ones were a placid mix of the too. His were far more attractive, I could become lost in Harry's alluring gaze forever.

Gemma's dark eyes searched mine desperately for any sign of life in my rigid, unmoving posture. Her looks were deceiving though. I knew what crawled beneath her pretty exterior was not like the warmth that was hidden beneath Harry's harsh one. Gemma was a cold hearted monster who had played a major part in tearing Harry apart piece by piece until he was shattered to the point where he was almost too broken to be fixed.

"Are you alright? I'm such a klutz? Oh my god!" Gemma gushed.

I opened my mouth to speak but no words came out. I didn't know what to say, she had hurt and mentally damaged Harry and I was almost afraid I would punch her square in the face if I wasn't so shocked by her presence.

"Nat!" Harry's voice rang out loud and clear, echoing off the hollowed out walls and ringing in my ears.

The sound of my name falling from his pink lips seemed to snap me out of my momentary shock. I blinked a couple of times, peering around Harry's sister to see Harry jogging down the narrow passage that led from the exit. His clothes were sodden, eyebrows set in a deep frown as his frantic gaze locked with mine. I swallowed nervously as he drew nearer, unaware of the fact that this was about to become a family reunion.

Gemma's head twisted in the direction of his voice. In the same moment, Harry practically skidded to a holt, his eyes widening in horror. I could practically see the cogs ticking in his head as he absorbed the image before him. I don't think I'd ever seen him look quite so mortified in the entire time I'd known him. In fact, id never seen him look scared or afraid, Harry usually maintained such a calm composure. I didn't think he even had any fears but I guess everyone's afraid of something. In Harry's case it seems to be his sister and I don't blame him. After everything that's happened to him throughout the course of his life I would feel the exact same way. I could see it in his eyes even from several metres away. He was afraid he was going to receive more abuse, hear more hurtful words and feel more daggers piercing his fragile heart. The look on his face said it all.

"Harry?" Gemma's voice came out in little more than a whisper, her words drifting through the could air with a mist of warm breath.

Harry seemed to flinch as she spoke his name, like the very sound of her voice pained him. I couldn't quite comprehend how this already disastrous trip had suddenly taken another leap deeper into hell. Nothing seemed to be going right for us at the moment. It felt as though Harry and I were being pummelled by wave after wave of disaster. The guilt in the pit of my stomach was growing by the second, this was all my fault. I had come back here hoping to escape the drama at home for while only to find myself drowning in even more drama and the worst thing about it was that I wasn't even the one suffering most of the pain. Harry was taking all the punches, receiving shit from me, my friends and now his past was coming back to haunt him.

Gemma had just popped up out of the blue. Out of bloody well nowhere. We either had the worst luck in the world or Harry and I were both cursed. I was exhausted both physically and mentally drained after everything that had gone on this week. Harry undoubtably felt the same, if not worse. I just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry. I wanted to wrap my arms round Harry's body and tell him just how sorry I was that this had all happened and just how badly I had messed up. I had dragged him into all this shit and the guilt was eating me from the inside out.

I didn't ask for any of this. I never intended on anyone getting hurt, let alone Harry of all people. He didn't deserve any of the shit he's had to put up with. He has had enough damage and hurt inflicted on him in his life and he shouldn't receive anymore. This trip was supposed to be fun. I wanted to show him around my home and introduce him to my closest friends and family but that all backfired on me.

With every moment we spend here, this trip finds its way to a new level of hell. It only seems to get worse and I can't help but feel an awful guilt settling in the pit of my stomach because I know Harry is hurting. He did one of the sweetest things I could have ever dreamed of. He brought me back here to make me happy and it isn't fair that he is now suffering for it. We should have just stayed home because it would have saved this entire thing from caving in on me.

Out of all the terrible things that could have happened though, this is by far the worst. I can't believe Gemma's here! One of the many monsters who had permanently scarred Harry and broken his precious heart. I wish I could've just grabbed him by the collar and ran but unfortunately I was frozen to the spot.

All I could so was watch as Harry's gaze shifted back and forth between his sister and I. He looked as though he was having an internal debate over whether he should make a run for it or if he should stay and help me up, risking further confrontation with Gemma. If I wasn't so stunned I would have gotten up in a flash, grabbed him by the collar and basically carry him out of there as fast as possible. As I was currently immobilised I honestly didn't care what he did. In no way would I be hurt or offended if he left me here. I honestly wouldn't blame him for leaving, I mean this is one of the people who hurt Harry so badly that he almost lost himself. I wish he would just get out of here before the horrible guilt I feel for bringing him here kills me. I can't take much more of this. Seeing Harry hurting like this kills me because I'm accountable for this collateral damage.

My gaze locked with his as he continued to gape at his long lost sister who was wearing an expression much the same as his. There was absolutely no denying they were related. It was so obvious in the way they reacted and their attractive features that they were siblings. Harry desperately searched my eyes, hoping for some form of help as the three of us nervously glanced at each other like a trio of stunned mullets. None of us appeared to be in our right minds. We all seemed to be trapped in a daze, somewhere between a dream and a harsh reality.

None of us could quite believe what was going on. It was the most unthinkable thing that could have possibly happened, in a place and at a time like this. I silently cursed myself for having such bad luck and having dragged Harry into this hell hole where things were only getting worse. About an hour ago I didn't think life could have gotten any badder but I was terribly wrong and now the devil is probably cackling to himself somewhere deep within hell.

My heart contorted in pain as Harry's gaze met with mine. I could see the mixed emotions swirling in his emerald green eyes.There was a mix of fear, pain and worry and the desperate way he looked at me was enough bring me to my senses. It gave me just enough strength to be able to silently tell him to get the hell out of the supermarket and run for his damn life.

Harry didn't think twice about leaving. The moment I sent him that look he abruptly turned on his heel, his body clumsily twisting as he did so. Before anyone had the chance to stop him, he darted back towards the exit.

"Harry!" Gemma cried out. "Harry wait!"

I could hear the desperation laced through her voice as she called after her younger brother. I was left forgotten as Gemma scrambled to her feet in an attempt to follow Harry. It was only then that I woke up from my daze. My eyelashes fluttered a number of times as I refocused on the situation at hand. Harry charged down the corridor, desperately trying to evade his long lost sibling who had made his life living hell. Gemma on the other hand was trying to catch up to him however it wasn't in the way to would expect a cruel person who only wanted to hurt him more would.

Gemma looked desperate. Her honey coloured hair flayed out at all angles as she tried to catch up to Harry. He was to fast though, his long legs carrying him at top speed He had disappeared around the corner before Gemma had even made it halfway down the hall. The sound of her heavy footfalls gradually grew less frequent as she slowed, eventually coming to a standstill. I watched as her shoulders dropped and her strong posture turning into somewhat of a slouch in a sign of defeat.

It was only then that I realised Gemma wasn't quite as bad as I had thought. I knew Harry could only see her as one of the many people who hurt him and he had every right to think that. I however saw this situation in a completely different perspective. I was the third person, watching from the side line, at a new angle and I could see things were different.

By simply looking at Gemma right now I could see that she knew what pain she had inflicted on Harry. She wasn't trying to hurt him more though. That was made obvious by her actions, the desperate way she had chased after him and in the defeated way she now carried herself. She wasn't trying to hurt him. She was trying to make things right.

I know what Gemma has done to Harry. She's hurt him badly and permanently damaged him but seeing her try to communicate with him in such a way made me realise she was asking for a second chance. Maybe she only wanted a chance to explain herself to him. Either way I could see she wanted to fix things with her brother and I know it's not up to me but I think she and Harry should talk. Harry has been alone for a long time and he has very few people to lean on. Maybe if his sister was back in the picture he'd have a bit more support and wouldn't feel quite so bad about himself. However, that occurring does depend on a number of factors and I'm not entirely sure about Gemma, I could be wrong about her. If I'm right though, the next problem is going to be getting Harry to speak to her. I am a hundred percent sure he'll refuse which is understandable. He is way to shocked by this unexpected meeting to want to speak to her now and I think his fear for being hurt further will also make him want to avoid her.

Maybe if I talk to her and find out what Gemma wants then maybe I'll be able to talk Harry into speaking with her. That all depends on whether i think what she has to say is acceptable enough to receive any form of conversation with Harry. She can get lost if she intends on hurting him more. I'm not letting her anywhere near him if thats the case. I'm not letting Harry get hurt any further. He already has enough problems on his hands, he doesn't need Gemma adding to his troubles and making him suffer further. Harry is trying to put his dark past behind him. Recently people have been digging it back up only moments after he'd piled a mound of dirt back on top. I know seeing Gemma here will only uproot his past further but maybe if they can sort out their issues some of those dark memories can me buried for good. I want that for Harry. I want him to be happy and the more he can come to terms with his past and accept them the happier he's going to be.

I closed my eyes briefly in order to prepare myself for the confrontation I would have to endure with Gemma in a matter of moments. I have no idea what Gemma is going to be like in this situation. If she is anything remotely similar to Harry, she's probably going to be an emotional wreck who's severely bipolar and that's putting it nicely. I'm hoping she's not as much of a hurricane as Harry is though.

I left the groceries on the floor as I stumbled to my feet, almost tripping over the bags in the process. As I started my way down the corridor towards Gemma who was still standing in the same spot, staring at the spot where Harry had disappeared, something caught my eye. Her iPhone still lay face down on the cold linoleum where it had fallen when we collided. Quietly I made my way towards the handheld object. I carefully collected it from the floor before heading back in the direction of Harry's older sister.

My heart thudded heavily in my chest as I drew nearer to the older female. I had no idea about what to say to her. I couldn't just stroll up to her and be like "Oh hey Gemma, I'm Natalie and I want you to apologies to my boyfriend and fix the scarring damage you've done to him or I'm gonna kill you." That would sound so good that I'm pretty sure she'd follow Harry's lead only this time Gemma would be running for me. I had ill feelings towards her but being rude to her wasn't going help the situation. I had to be reasonably nice otherwise the situation would only become worse and I didn't want that. I wanted to help fix the broken bond between them, not severe it further.

Small tremors jarred my finders as I grew nearer. I couldn't help but feel slightly nervous about speaking to Gemma after everything I had heard about her from Harry. In his wyes she was cruel and hurtful but out of all the monsters in his life i had always seen her as being the best of the spiteful bunch. If this was Jonathan or Harry's dad that i bumped into i sure as hell would not be about to confront them. I think I would have either called the cops by now or made a run for it. I never wanted to meet either of the disappointing father figures i Harry's life.

The only reason I was going to talk to Gemma was because her mind had been poisoned against Harry since the day he was born. He and Gemma might have been the best of friends if their psycho maniac father hadn't turned her against him. There had never really been a chance for a sibling bond between them and I think that if we can get things to work that bond will be good for both them.

I shoved my anxiety aside as I shifted to stand before her.



 

My breath caught in my throat as I absorbed her expression. Though I was slightly stunned by the image before me, my suspicions were also proved correct.

Small droplets glistened on her cheeks as they rolled down her face before splattering to the floor. Her misty eyes were transfixed on the gaping hole which Harry had disappeared through only moments earlier. It was at that moment that it became evident that Gemma wasn't looking to hurt Harry further. She was in fact searching for his forgiveness and it was at that moment I promised myself that even though I could not assure she would receive that, I was going to do everything in my power to help.

I could see the sadness glittering in her eyes. She missed her little brother and it was now evident that she had realised her fault. I found myself pitying her. What she had done to Harry was not something that could be easily forgiven. She was going to find it even more difficult to find forgiveness from Harry as he had built his walls up so high over the years he had spent alone and it was near impossible to reach him at all. O havnt even been able to break them down completely. Ive partially broken through though he is still very defensive and has not entirely opened up to me yet. Trust does not come easily with Harry and if Gemma wants his forgiveness badly enough it will take a lot of effort for her to warm even the tiniest bit of trust from him. His guard is going to be up even more after this unexpected run in.

My teeth clamped around my lower lip as I awkwardly stood in front of her, unsure of what to do or say. This was an odd situation and I had no idea how to handle it. She didn't have the foggiest clue about who I was but I knew exactly who she was and what she had done to my boyfriend. On top of that she was crying and I wasn't exactly able to comfort her and to be honest I didn't want to. She had hurt Harry much more badly than this and I think she deserves to feel a bit of that pain she put him through.

"You're Gemma." I spoke quietly.

I intently studied Gemma's expression as I waited for her to reply. Gemma's dainty fingers darted to her face where she frantically wiped away the small droplets and smudged make up from beneath her eyes. Uncomfortable was the only word needed to describe the way I was feeling. I really didn't want to talk to Gemma because of who she was and what she had done to Harry. I was going to do it though because the outcome could be better for both Gemma and Harry.

Gemma's eyes locked with mine as she slightly tilted her head to look up at me. In this situation i was thankful for my hight, it made me feel slightly more intimidating than i otherwise might feel against this girl who had severely hurt the person I loved and cared for so much. My hight boosted my confidence and gave me a bit of an edge that could come in handy if things got messy. My current thoughts made it obvious that I spent a lot of time with Harry as I stood sizing Gemma up and deciding whether or not I could take her on in a fist fight. I clearly spend far to much time watching him scrap it out with other males then I should as some of him is starting to rub off on me.

"Y-yeah." Gemma softly sobbed, continuously wiping under her eyes even though all traces of her smudged make up was long gone. "How do you know who I am?"

Her voice was quiet but there was a hint of defensiveness within it. I could see she was wary of me. I was nothing more than a simple acquaintance who she had unexpectedly knocked into as she walked into the supermarket to do her shopping. She knew very little about me but there was one thing she did know and that was the fact I was someone to her brother and that was sure to make her feel uneasy. Very uneasy.

I held the advantage in every single way. I knew who she was whilst she was practically clueless as to who the stranger standing before her was. There was nothing she could do to harm me because I was practically intangible.

"Harry told me all about you." I snarled.

I watched as her eyes widened and the colour in her cheeks drain from her face. She looked mortified by the idea of someone knowing what she had done to her brother. Gemma should be ashamed of herself and seeing this expression written all over her face makes it obvious she is. The fear that flashed through her eyes didn't go unnoticed as I studied her expression. It was becoming increasingly obvious that she felt threatened by me. Though I had wanted to come off as nice I couldn't keep up that facade I would be playing. What she had done to Harry infuriated me. There was nothing I could be more angry about than the damage she had done to him. I couldn't just ignore than hurt she had inflicted on him. I had to acknowledge it because I wanted her to see how much I cared for Harry and how I wasn't going to belittle him as she did.

Gemma should have protected him from the monsters under his bed not leave him with the word 'hate' echoing in his ears as he watched her abandon him. She should have been there to guide him instead of forgetting him and letting others mislead him and poison his innocent mind. If Gemma had of stayed around Harry's mind would not be as badly tainted as it is today. He would not be as scarred and brutalised if she had of been there for him. She wasn't there though and he was almost consumed by the darkness that looms over him waiting for the opportune moment to strike.

"W-who are you." She asked timidly as a small step was taken away from me.

"Natalie." My voice softened after noticing her fear. My arm extended in her direction as I held her iPhone out to her, offering some form of truce. "I care about your brother and if you ever want to speak to him again your gonna need my help."

I watched her eyes widen again. This time however, she wasn't afraid of me but more so shocked by what I had just offered to do. I wasn't going to do this for her though. I was only doing this for Harry. Ultimately he was the one who would be most affected by Gemma's reappearance and it was his decision whether or not he wanted her back in his life. I had no control over his choice and nor did I want to. Whatever happens I will support him and protect him. Gemma is not going anywhere remotely near Harry until I hear what she has to say. I don't want him getting hurt any further, the guilt creeping its way throughout my body and chilling my blood was becoming almost too much for me to handle.

I opened my mouth to speak but what I was going to say was abruptly forgotten when I caught a glimpse of something from the corner of my eye. My stomach twisted nervously as I locked my gaze upon the slick black vehicle that I was more than familiar with. It was right outside the supermarket, perfectly aligned astride the curb. I didn't even need to look at the number plate to know who's car it was. There was no doubt it was Harry's car.

It wasn't the car that made my head pound and my heart race that little bit faster. It was the fact that the engine was still running, headlights blazing through the gloom and rain and there sat in the drivers seat was nothing but thin air. When Harry had made a run for it, I had presumed he would make a getaway in his car. I thought he would have wanted to escape as fast as possible and he can go a hell of a lot faster in his car then he can on foot. I was wrong though. If Harry wasn't in his car that meant he was out on unfamiliar streets, confused, in the rain and on his own wearing nothing but a pair of sodden jeans and a T-shirt.

The idea of Harry running blindly through the rain with a clouded mind whilst he was hurting frightened me. His tendency to do stupid things whilst under stress always worries me and this time is no exception. I don't want him out there on his own. Why can't he ever take ten seconds to think about what he's doing? It would save both of us a hell of a lot of hassle if he would use his head every so often rather than acting on impulse all the time. All that happens is that I get so worried about Harry that I end up an anxious wreck and he generally does something stupid and my worries are brought to life.

I have to find him.

"I never meant to hurt him like that." The sound of Gemma's sobs where what forced me to avert my gaze from the empty vehicle. "What I did was awful. You probably think I'm some kind of monster and you're probably right. God! I'm so so-"

"Look, it's not me you should be apologising to, it's Harry." I spoke cuttingly. "I'm sorry, but I can't listen to your sob story right now, I have more important things to do like finding him."

Gemma's eyebrows furrowed downwards into a frown, clearly confused by my rather rude interruption that had basically come out of nowhere. I wasn't in the mood for bullshit today. Quite frankly I was totally over everything that had happened this week. All I wanted to do was curl up into a little ball and die. Nothing was going my way, not even remotely close. I was cold, hungry and absolutely exhausted. I couldn't cater to my own needs though. No, I had to go find my fallen angel who had just had the scare of his life after his damn sister knocked me over. I was fucking done with this shit! I swear if his father and bloody stepfather show up as well I will go by a shitload of dynamite and tear this damned town to the ground. I am done with Doncaster, I really am.

It took everything I had left in me not to crumple to the ground and scream my lungs out. That was honestly all I wanted to do right now. I was on the verge of a mental break down, or another one since I'm pretty sure yesterday counts.

I ran a hand through my tangled hair, lightly tugging on the roots. A dull pain shot through my skull but it was somewhat soothing as mind briefly became focused on something other than the stress clawing its way from my stomach throughout the rest of my body. I desperately tried to convince myself that everything was going to be okay. Usually this helped when I was feeling stressed about an exam or a sports event that I was nervous about because I knew that everything would be fine. Both those things only happened for so long. You sit your exam and then its over. You run a race and then its finished. This occasion was different though, it was like an ongoing series of disasters that were gradually putting more weight on my chest and tying even larger knots in my already twisted stomach. I didn't know when it was going to stop or of it ever would and that was what really got to me. What if it never stopped.

These thoughts and listening to Gemma whine triggered an all new level of stress and I couldn't control it. The trembling began in my fingers, slowly working its way up my arms to my shoulders. Gemma's frown was quickly replaced by a look of concern as she peered up at me through long webbed lashes. I couldn't believe I was losing it in front of Harry's sister. I was about to crash and burn standing right before her and there was absolutely nothing I could do to prevent my imminent fate. I was meant to be strong. I had wanted to stand tall, look her in the eyes and tell her how much she had hurt Harry and how I was going to make her life living hell if she dared hurt him like that again.

I was like Harry in this aspect. I refused to let people see me cry. I wanted people to see me as strong, fearless and impossible to break but like my father, I too have a weakness. I am not intangible or invincible. I am not fearless or untouchable. I would fall to my knees for Harry in a split second and I would do everything I could to save him in but a moment. He drives me to the point of insanity and Gemma is going to witness first hand proof of this. I loved Harry with everything I had and more and I hated the way he still hurt because of the people like Gemma and Mitchell who dug up his past whether it was deliberate or pure accident. He was my weakness and there seemed to be nothing I could possibly do to stop him hurting. I wanted to save him but I was struggling and it was eating away at me bit by bit. Slowly killing me.

"Are you alright?" Gemma asked quietly.

She was probably frightened I would lash out at her but I was honestly too exhausted to do anything other than cry right now. Her dark eyes searched my worriedly an emotion which took me slightly by surprise as it had when I figured out who she was. Surely a heartless monster like her was incapable for any form of concern for others. I almost felt bad for thinking so harshly of her when she gently touched my shoulder as if in a form of comfort.

That was when I lost it.

I loud sob racked through my chest, involuntarily escaping my lips an reaching the ears of Gemma, much to my dismay. Tears spilled down my cheeks, my efforts to contain them failing. They flowed down my cheeks like a river, constantly falling and streaking my face with wet streaks. Crying was the one thing I hated with a passion. It made me feel weak and lowly. Whenever I cried I front of someone I felt as though I was selfishly searching for pity. I didn't want pity from anyone and I never have. I'm not an attention seeker in fact I hate being the centre of attention! This was not what I wanted Gemma's first impression on me to be. This was less than pathetic.

"Oh God." My fingers frantically swiped beneath my eyes in an attempt to remove the small droplets of salty liquid from my cheeks, disposing the evidence of my current stress.

It was ironic how only minutes ago Gemma had been the one sobbing and now I was the one in hysterics. My life is currently a jumbled mess of broke pieces and I have no idea how to put it back together. There was nothing I wanted more than to pack my bags, shove Harry in the car and speed back to my mother at the speed of light. Doncaster was killing me and there was nothing I could do in my power to slow my closing death.

"Natalie?" Gemma asked carefully.

The gentle patting on my back was both strange yet comforting at the same time. Gemma was no friend of mine and I was nothing more than a crazy, emotional acquaintance to her yet here we were standing in a supermarket acting as though we were friends. Her gentleness took me slightly by surprise. Dainty hands soothingly attended to my back as I sobbed into the palms of my hands. The way I had imagined Gemma was nothing compared to this. I had thought she was evil, incapable of emotion. She was what I would consider kind though and I was finding it difficult to believe she had hurt Harry in the way she did. Gemma seemed much too sweet and caring to do such a thing. I wanted to hate her, I really did but the thing was I couldn't find anything to hate.

"I've had such a terrible week." I cried aimlessly. "I just wanna go home."

"Hey, it'll be okay." Gemma softly comforted. 

+++

My breakdown was short lived thanks to Gemma who seemed to have a talent for comforting people. My sobs had slowly thinned out into heavy breaths and the somewhat of a constant flow of tears had finally ceased. I still felt sick to the stomach, it felt as though my insides were constantly contorting and tying themselves into undo able knots.

I was feeling surprisingly better after drinking a bottle of water and having something to eat. To the curtsy of Gemma of course. My fingers curled around an apple that Gemma had forced me to eat after I told her I hadn't eaten in a couple of days. I didn't mean to tell her, it kind of just slipped out along with the rest of my blubbering. I felt pretty stupid about what had just happened but she didn't seem to mind. If anything she seemed understanding.

Taking another bite of my apple, I looked to Gemma from where I was seated on the floor, head resting against the wall. She loomed over me, peering down at me thoughtfully. I felt almost as though I was some kind of experiment under her gaze. It was like she was studying me, searching for any kind of change or reaction in the zombie like female who she had fed an apple.

"Are you feeling better?" Gemma asked, cocking her head a little to the side.

I nodded my head. I as by feeling on top of the world but I wasn't feeling like I'd entirely hit rock bottom. I still felt as anxious as fuck. I desperately wanted to find Harry. I had to know he was safe and not lying dead on the pavement somewhere with blood pouring out of his chest.

"Yeah. Thanks." I quietly replied, granting her with my appreciation.

Gemma gave me a small smile, the corners of her mouth tweaking upwards a little, revealing a pair of indents on either of her cheeks. She and Harry were so alike that It wasn't funny. God I wish Harry were here right now! I hate it when he runs off like this. He could have at least taken the car and bring me a little peace of mind.

"You want to go find him don't you." Gemma's voice lowered and her gaze fell to the floor as the subject of Harry was brought up.

It was obvious she was uncomfortable with discussing Harry, that was made clear by her refusal to meet my eyes. We'd been avoiding bringing him up for a good twenty minutes now but we both knew sooner or later he'd be brought up.

I nodded again in agreement.

"I get that and I won't try and stop you or help you. I know he doesn't want to talk to me but could we maybe meet later on." Her eyes briefly darted up to meet with mine before quickly shifting back to the spot on the floor they had been fixated on earlier. "I just want to explain myself."

I pinched the apple between my left thumb and forefinger as my right hand delved into my puffa jacket pocket to retrieve my phone. My predicaments had been correct and Gemma wanted a chance to explain herself and to apologise to Harry. I was willing to listen to her but I wasn't so sure if he was. The hurt that Gemma had inflicted upon Harry cut him deeply and I'm not sure if he's ready to face his past or if he'll ever be. Harry has been severely damaged, more than I had first thought and I'm afraid I still don't know his entire story.

I can only try to mend his broken mind, fill the gaping hole in his fragile heart, remove the scars from his tattered skin.

With every passing moment I fear Harry is broken beyond repair.

Gemma and I exchanged numbers, agreeing to meet at a later time. I wasn't exactly pleased by this as it meant we'd have to stay here longer than I would have liked. It would have been preferable if I was able to talk to Gemma now and get it over and done with. I can't speak to her with a clear head when I have no idea where Harry is or what kind of trouble he's getting himself into. There's this huge ache in my chest and all I can think about is him right now.

Gemma and I walked side by side as we made our way on the direction of Harry's car. The rain hammered down on us from the grumpy, grey rainclouds situated way up in the sky. The weather was getting worse and by the looks of the sky there was a highly plausible chance that the rain would soon become accompanied by thunder and lightning. The weather made me feel sick to the stomach due to the fact I knew the way Harry got whilst in a thunder storm. The though of the frightened way he reacted to every roll of thunder and crack of lightning made me even more desperate to find him. Of all the days he could chose to run why did it have to be today? This was the worst possible time for him wander of into a incoming thunderstorm with no jacket and no sense of direction.

Harry styles was by far the most difficult person I'd ever had to deal with. He was so unpredictable. One moment he'd be all cute and cuddly then the next his nostrils would be flaring and his eyes would have darkened to a shade of near black. To be honest I'm shocked that bipolar wasn't marked down in his police file. From the time that I'd been with Harry I'd managed to deduce that ninety percent of the time he acted of pure impulse. He almost never thought rationally and on the odd occasion when he did it would have been after some serious persuasion from me.

Neither Gemma nor I spoke as we hurried through the pouring rain with a shopping bag gripped I either hand. I had kindly declined her offer to help me carry my stuff back to Harry's car but she was adamant to help and I was too worn out to refuse. Fortunately it didn't take long to reach the car and the awkward silence that seemed to look over us like one of the rain cloud was quickly evaded on my behalf as I tugged the back door open and set the groceries down on the back seat. Following my lead, Gemma set the pair of shopping bags she was carrying alongside the others on the black leather once I'd moved out of the way. I watched as her nimble figure ducked under the frame for a moment as she set the shopping bags down before her head popped up again. Her eyes locked with mine for a moment and I found myself giving her a small smile of gratitude.

"I hope it doesn't take you too long to find him. He always used to run of as a little kid and no one could ever find him." She smiled weakly. "But I think he was so good at hiding because no one ever really looked."

I had already heard about his weeklong disappearances and vanishing trips from Harry himself so this information was nothing new to me. However, hearing her admit that no one really cared for him broke my heart. I had hoped that maybe Harry was wrong when he said that. When people are feeling sorry for themselves they say no one cares about them which is most commonly untrue. It saddens me to think that Harry wasn't one of those people and that no one truly cared for him. Gemma's words brought what Harry had told me more to life and I was beginning to see fragments of how horrible his childhood had been and what I saw made me feel ill. No one deserves to feel the way Harry must. I can't even begin to imagine what a loveless childhood would have felt like and it sickens me to think he spent his entire eighteen years of life lonely and unloved.

"I always cared about him, Natalie, I never showed it. I had too many bad influences in my life and I became just as poisoned and corrupt as they were. Harry had a strong heart though. His soul was pure and he loved the monsters under his bed even though they hurt him in the most horrible way possible. He leapt at the chance for the love that no one gave him. He would do anything to grasp our attention and display his love. I should have been there to protect him but I was jealous."

My fists involuntarily curled at my sides as I listened to her speak. I could feel the anger I had towards her coursing through my veins, fizzing in my blood and seeping into my skin. Gemma was damn right about how she should have been there to protect him! Where the fuck was she when her demented stepfather was selling her desperate, clueless baby brother off as a prostitute to a bunch of paying women who would be more than happy to touch him in ways he most certainly should not have been touched. What kind of sick person does that? Why the fuck did Gemma let that happen even if she was a jealous bitch? I would t even wish that upon the likes of Luke or Adam!

Gemma swallowed hard, obviously noticing my enraged state and realising she was very close to being either verbally or physically attacked by an emotional female who was having a very bad week.

"I know you probably don't believe me and hate me with a passion but you have to understand my family was so messed up." Gemma spoke hesitantly. "My mother was useless at picking men and she payed the price for it. My dad was demented and my stepfather was purely psychotic. I was a spoilt brat, bribed and manipulated by my father. We were all monsters." Gemma paused to take a breath.

"Everyone knows that monsters envy the ones with the purest of hearts."

+++

(A.N.

I AM NOT DEAD!

I repeat.

I AM NOT DEAD!

Omg, I can't believe how long it's taken me to write this chapter. What's it been... 10 years? I'm going to be honest and say it was because I was feeling really uninspired as the last few chapters I have written have not been up to my usual standard. I lost my touch.

BUT GUESS WHAT!!!

Its coming back if you hadn't noticed already!

I'd just like to thank my English teacher for saving this fanfic. Your creative writing tips were very useful and you are now my favourite teacher!

Hopefully the next chapter will be even better and then we'll all be happy.

BTW Thank you guys so much for reading and voting and waiting so patiently for this chapter.

ILYSM

~Natiall)

 

Join MovellasFind out what all the buzz is about. Join now to start sharing your creativity and passion
Loading ...