I Just Want to be Loved *Completed*

When Brittany's mum get's remarried, she got a surprises when she finds out who her new step brothers are. When she starts living with one of them and his friends, and starts 'dating' one of them, she starts to question herself. Was her life to complicated? What's going to happen when her past catches up with her? Will Louis ever tell her his secret? Are one of the boys going to fall for her? What will Liam do when she becomes known as 'Mummy Direction'? And most importantly, will the boys be understanding about her past and help her in the future?

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40. Cause and Effect

When I woke up, I was in an alleyway. I was a fifth awake, and four fifths asleep. It hurt to move, and I didn’t even have enough energy to even turn over. Everything was so sore.

It looked to be about noon, and I could hear the sounds of a busy city. Well, the sounds of a city, and a crying baby.

“Danny,” I croaked, and turned my head to look for him. He was about ten feet away, and was lying by the alley wall. Surrounding him, were my clothes, and my suitcase.

I knew what had happened to me, but I didn’t want to come to terms with it. I didn't want to believe what had happened to me.

“Is that a baby?” I heard someone ask.

“I think it is,” someone else responded.

I saw two figures walk into the alley, but I was about seventy feet down, and it wasn’t very well lit.

“Where is it?” one of them asked.

“Probably farther down,” the other one replied and I saw them jogging down.

“Oh my god!” one gasped when he saw me. His friend picked up Danny and then they both ran to me and kneeled down. “Phil, call nine one one.”

The boy who was holding Danny, Phil, pulled out his phone and started talking.

“Here,” the other one said and went and grabbed my shirt. He helped me sit up, and he put it on me. Then he grabbed my pants and did the same. “What’s your name?” he asked.

“Brittany,” I said. It came out more like ‘Brightny,’ but he understood.

“I’m Derek, and this is Phil. You’re going to be okay, do you understand?” I nodded slowly, and then I fell sideways and everything went black.

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*****

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When I woke up again, I was in a hospital room. The two boys from the alleyway were in the chairs in the room, and they were asleep.

“Hi,” I croaked, and slowly sat up. The boys didn’t move. I looked around the room and saw a glass of water on the table by my bed, so I took a drink. “Hi,” I said again, this time my voice was normal.

Phil woke up and then hit Derek in the chest. “You’re awake,” Derek said shocked.

“No shit Sherlock,” I replied sarcastically.

Yeah, no shit Sherlock,” Phil mocked Derek.

“How long have I been out?” I asked running a hand through my hair.

“About a day,” Derek replied.

“Really?” I asked.

“Yeah,” Phil said. “Wait, should we get a nurse?”

“Probably,” Derek told him and Phil jogged out of the room.

“Where’s Danny?” I asked suddenly when I realized that the baby was nowhere in sight.

“Ummmmm, well, the police took him,” Derek said slowly.

“What!” I yelled and then started hyperventilating. The thoughts of all the reasons that they would have taken him filled my mind.

“Calm down,” Derek said and walked over to my bed and made me drink some water.

“Why did they take him?”

“I’m not sure, but they said that you needed to answer a few questions before you could see him.”

Then, a doctor walked in. “Brittany Tom, can we ask you a few question?”

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*****

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When the doctor left, two cops walked in.

“Hi,” I said to them.

“Hello, I’m Officer Brian, and this is Deputy Nichols,” the cop replied.

“We would like to ask you a few questions,” Nichols said.

“Go for it,” I told them.

“Why did you suddenly leave the country?”

“Things got complicated at home,” I replied honestly. I could see that the Officer was about to press the question farther, but the Deputy gave him a look that said, ‘not now.’

“Okay, there is a more important question.”

“Which is?” I asked.

“Why were you found in an alleyway with a child that was not yours?” the Officer asked.

“Okay, well that is a very long, complicated, weird story,” I replied.

“We have time, so you better start telling it,” the Deputy said and my face dropped. I was a little angry that they wanted me to tell them something personal, so I told them in a slightly pissed off tone.

“Okay, so, a few months ago, a baby was dropped off at my doorstep. I should probably mention that I live with the band know as One Direction, but back to the point. We took the baby and got testing done, and it turned out to be one of theirs. I taught them how to take care of Danny, and they said that if I ever went on vacation, to take Danny with me.”

“Then we went on tour, and my best friend starting dating Liam Payne, then I became really sad because it was my baby’s birthday, and I starting getting angry at the boys for bring a baby back into my life. They thought that it would be a good time to go and take me to a club and get me drunk.”

“Then I left with one of my friends and went back to the tour bus and had sex with him. When I woke up, I realized what I did, so I packed a bag for Danny and me, and we got onto a plane. I just wanted to get as far away from everyone that I knew as possible.”

“When I had to get off of the bus that I was riding on because the bus driver had to take the bus back or something and I started walking to the nearest hotel. Then I got raped.”

The cops looked slightly shocked at my story.

“That is the biggest bunch of bullshit that I have ever heard,” the Deputy said and my eyes widened and my jaw dropped.

“What!” I yelled.

“My daughter is obsessed with One Direction, and there is no way that that story is true,” he added.

“But it is!” I yelled.

“Well, prove it.”

“Just get me something with the internet,” I replied.

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Ten minutes later, I was on a laptop. I went onto Google and typed in ‘Brittany Tom.’

Hundreds of pictures showed up, and I gasped. It was my first time Googleing myself since I had started hanging out with One Direction, and I was shocked at how much came up.

I looked for a picture of the boys, Danny and I, and when I found one, I showed the cops.

“Could be photo shopped,” Brian said and I showed them another, which they replied the same to.

After ten photos, I started to get a little pissy. I went onto the One Direction fan page, and saw ‘Brittany Tom Disappears?!?’

“That better?” I asked and showed them the article.

“A little bit,” Nichols replied. “But we still need parental consult from Harry Styles that he knows you and that he knows you have his child.”

I reached over to the table and grabbed my phone. I went to Harry’s contact and face timed him.

“Brittany!” he screamed when he answered. I could see that he was sitting by Niall and Zayn, and it looked like, and sounded like, they were in the middle of a concert.

“Are you in the middle of a concert?” I asked and Harry flipped the screen to show the audience, then flipped it back.

“Where have you been!” Niall yelled and grabbed the phone from Harry.

“That doesn’t matter. Put Harry back on,” I said and Harry was passed back his phone. “Okay, Harry, this is going to sound a little weird, but will you please tell these gentlemen that you know me and you know that I have Danny?”

“Ummmm, sure?” he yelled over the screaming fans. I gave my phone to the cops. “Hi, ummmm, I know Brittany Tom, and I know that she has Danny,” Harry yelled slowly and the cops handed my phone back to me.

“Good enough, we’ll have the nurses bring Danny right in,” the Officer said and both of the cops walked out.

“Bye!” I yelled to Harry and ended face time.

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When Derek and Phil walked in, Phil was carrying Danny.

“Danny,” I said excitedly and the baby started wiggling in Phil’s arms. Since Phil was about to lose his grip on Danny, he rushed over to me and handed me to him. “Hi baby,” I said with a smile.

“No need to call me baby,” Derek said, “We only met yesterday.”

Ha ha, very funny,” I replied sarcastically.

“It was,” he said with a smile.

“So, we never properly introduced ourselves,” Phil said and held out his hand. “I’m Phil.”

I shook it and then did the same to the other boy. “And I’m Derek.”

“Nice to meet you. I’m Brittany, and this is Danny.”

“Okay,” Derek said with a suddenly very serious look on his face. “There’s something that I’ve been meaning to ask you.”

“What is it?” I asked.

“Are you British?”

“Why yes, I am,” I replied.

“Pay up,” Phil said and Derek pulled out his wallet and handed Phil ten dollars.

“You guys made a bet about wither or not I was British?” I asked and Derek nodded.

“Where in Britain are you from?” he asked.

“Cheshire.”

“What are you doing here then?” Phil asked.

“I ran away.”

“Why?”

“It’s complicated.”

“I’m pretty sure that we can keep up,” Derek said and I and gave them a little smile.

“Things happened with the people that I lived with, and I just couldn’t deal with it, so I left.”

“Do you have a place to go?” Phil asked and I shook my head. Derek and Phil shared a look, and then Derek asked me a question.

“The hospital is releasing you later today, so do you want to crash at your place tonight?”

“I’ve been talking to you guys for, like, three minutes and you’re inviting me to sleep at our house?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s not like we’re going to do anything to you,” Derek joked and I laughed at that. I decided that I wasn’t going to let what had happened to me affect me that much.

“And how can I be sure of that?”

“Because we’re gay,” Phil said simply and my eyes widened.

“What? Really?”

“Yeah.”

“And you can stay at our place as long as you like as long as you promise that you’re not a homophobe,” Derek said.

“Well, I don’t really think that I am considering that one of my best friends is gay.”

“Then our house is open to you.”

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*****

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“You guys are probably the sweetest people that I have ever met,” I told them as we finished up dinner.

“And you might be the nicest, lest homophobic person we have ever had the pleasure to meet,” Phil responded from over by the sink where he was doing the dishes.

“Thanks,” I replied as I walked over to him. “Do you need any help?”

“No, but Derek might,” he said and I walked into the living room where Derek was feeding Danny.

“He’s just so cute,” Derek told me and I went and sat on the couch by him.

“I know.”

“Who’s the dad?”

“Uh, my friend.” Even though they didn’t know that I was friends with One Direction yet, I still couldn’t break my promise that I made with the boys about not telling who Danny’s dad is.

“Do you have full custody of him or something?”

‘Wait, is he pretty much asking if I’m his mother? Oh my god, what do I say.’ “Um, no. No I don’t. His father and I have this…agreement of sorts.” ‘Well, I didn’t say if I was his mum not. Mental self-five.’

When Danny was done eating, he yawned and started to fall asleep.

“Well someone’s tired,” Phil said as he walked into the room. Then I yawned.

“And someone else seems tired too,” Derek added.

“Come on, I’ll show you to your room.”

I stood up and followed Phil into the guest room. Derek came up behind us carrying my suitcase and the diaper bag.

“Thank you guys so much for this,” I told them with a smile.

“You’re welcome,” Phil said.

“Stay as long as you like,” Derek told me and he set my stuff down in the room.

“And we’re serious about that. As long as you like.

“We don’t get many visitors, so as far as we’re concerned, this room is now yours.”

“Thank you,” I said again. I set Danny on the bed and then went to give the two boys in front of me a huge hug. “Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome,” they said together.

“Good night,” I told them.

“Good night,” they replied, and walked out of the room, closing the door behind them.

I went and made Danny a little nest on the bed, and then laid him in it. Since he was already asleep, I didn’t have to deal with any crying, which made me happy.

I knew that I needed to take a shower, but I also knew that I needed to make a call first.

“Hi,” Niall said as he answered.

“Hi, are the boys with you?” I asked.

“Yeah.”

“Can you put me on speaker phone?”

“Of course.”

“Where are you?”

“I’m in America.”

“Are you safe?”

“What city are you in?”

“What hotel are you at?”

“Yes, I am safe,” I answered. “And I’m at…ummmm… a friend’s house.” I was afraid if I told them that I was going to be sleeping at a house with guys that I had just met the people, they might go a little crazy.

“Will you please come back?” Harry asked.

“I’m not sure yet,” I told them honestly.

“Just to make sure, is Danny with you?” Liam asked. He must not have heard Harry’s and I’s conversation earlier. Then again, they were in the middle of a concert.

“Yes.”

“Good. I was slightly afraid that a crazed fan broke into the bus and stole our child,” Liam said and I laughed.

“Okay, well, I have to go and shower,” I told them.

“Wait, Britt, can I talk to you for a sec?” Louis asked.

“Sure,” I said, and I heard Lou take me off speaker phone. It was a few moments before he said anything, and I’m guessing that he was walking away from the rest of the boys.

“I’m so sorry,” Louis said, and his voice cracking. “I’m sorry for everything.” It sounded like he was crying.

“Sweetheart, don’t cry,” I told him. “It’s not your fault.”

“But it is!”

“It’s not completely your fault.”

“I was the one who took you to the club, made you drink and then made the first move.” He sounded so broken.

“It’s okay,” I said, trying to reassure him. I wasn’t mad at him anymore. He seemed to feel so bad for everything that happened. “And here’s the thing, I’m now able to say, ‘I had sex with the one, the onlyLouis Tomlinson.” I heard him chuckle at that.

“If I were you, I wouldn’t be saying that to anyone,” Louis said and I could hear the smile in his voice.

“I know. I don’t want to be hated by every teenage girl in the world.”

“I miss you Britt. Please come back.”

“I’m sorry, but I can’t. At least not right now.”

“When?”

“I’m not sure, but you’ll be the first to know, okay?”

“Okay, but Brittany, I want to talk about this. I know you read my texts, and you know what I said.”

“I do know what you said,” I replied.

“And how do you feel about everything?”

“I’m not sure, I’m just really confused right now,” I told him honestly.

“I’m so sorry that I fucked everything up.”

“Stop blaming yourself. I’m taking half the blame.”

“No, I have more self-control than you do when drunk. I knew what was happening and I just couldn’t’ stop myself. You looked so, so, so victimable.

“Did you just make that word up?”

“Yep.”

“Nice job.”

“But I’m serious about that. It’s all my fault and stop trying to take the blame. It’s my fault that you left. I was the one that screwed everything up.”

“Stop blaming yourself,” I said again. “You know what? Sure, go for it and take the blame for us sleeping together since I know that I’m not going to be able convince you that it was my fault to, but don’t you dare take the blame for me leaving. I left on my own.”

“And you left because of me.”

“I will hang up on you if you don’t stop blaming yourself.”

“Okay, I’m sorry. Please don’t hang up. I just want to talk to you.”

“About what?”

“About last night and wither you felt anything or not.”

“I have a really good response to that, but I’m not going to say it because it’s completely inappropriate.” I hear Louis chuckle on the other end of the line.

“I think that I know what it was.”

“You probably do.”

“But seriously, back to the point. Did last night mean anything to you?”

“I’m not sure. I feel like it did, but I also feel like nothing would have happened if we weren’t wasted.”

“So, you did feel something?” Louis asked.

“Yeah, your dick inside me,” I replied sarcastically. I wanted to avoid the topic since I wasn’t really sure what I felt. My mind was filled with all these thoughts about last night, and I wasn’t able to find an answer that would explain everything.

“You just had to go there, didn’t you?” Louis said and I could hear the smile that was on his face.

“I did. I really did,” I told him,

“You’re just great at trying to avoid the topic, aren’t you?”

“I am,” I told him. “Bye,” I started to pull the phone away from my ear when Louis started talking.

“Will I hear from you again?”

“Good bye,” I said, and I hung up without answering his question.

As I went and took a shower, I thought to myself, ‘Should I call them? Should I just ignore them? I should probably just ignore them for a few days, maybe more. Well, at least until I can get a clear head and give Louis a straight answer about how I felt. I wasn’t exactly sure how I felt. I know that Louis is a nice guy, but I know that nothing would have happened if we weren’t both drunk. It’s just, I’ve always had these feeling for Louis. He was the member of One Direction that I had a crush on before I met them. There was just something about him that was familiar. It was like I recognized him from the moment I saw him on X Factor.’

‘Brittany,’ I said to myself. ‘You need to focus. You need to do what’s best for you and you know what that is.’ And I did know. I knew exactly what I needed to do. ‘I just need some space for everything One Direction.’

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