white noise chocolate

We all have our problems and with ours we need each other in order to solve them. We need to help each other, we need to understand each other. We need to love each other, make each other feel one another. Another. Other. Kiss me Niall, please, because there won't be another. Love me Niall, please, because I need to feel your touch before I go.


12. White

"Niall? Niall?!" I walked through his front door and it was bright. I brought my eyelids closer together as I tried to fight the sun. I didn't realize the apartment ever faced the sun. 


I turned my head to the side and saw him huddled in a corner. His hair was disheveled, his clothing wrinkled. He's been sitting there for hours. 

"What's going on?" 

He looked up at me, his eyes red and puffy from crying. "It's not bright enough. I can't smell it either."

"What the bloody hell are you talking about?"

"Whenever she came it was always so sunny and it smelled like chocolate. She's gone, I can't see her. It's so quiet."

My eyes widened at his despair. I shook my head slightly, but I had only one solution that would help. "When was the last time you cut?" 

"What?" He choked out. 

"When was the last time?" 

He let his head fall back against the brick wall. "Weeks." 

"I hate to admit it," I started as I opened the kitchen counter drawer and pulled a knife out. "You need to do it again." 

"That won't solve anything, it just makes things worse. She doesn't like when I do it."

"Who? Niall, who are you talking about?"

"Ireland!" He shouted. 

"The girl in the coma?" 

"She's not in a coma, her father pulled the plug of oxygen from her."

"Oh," I mumbled. "Niall then--."

"She woke up! She bloody woke up!"

"Isn't that good--?"

"She doesn't remember who I am." 

"Niall you never actually knew her." 

He shook his head like a child refusing to eat broccoli. "She was right there. She would sit at the window seat for hours. I saw her." 

"Are you saying you saw like a ghost?" 

"Don't fucking make fun of me, Liam!" 

I licked my lips. I was walking on dangerous ground. "I'm not, I'm just trying to understand. Just, Niall, what do you want me to do?" 

"They are throwing her a party tonight. I'm allowed to stay here, but I need to see her again before she goes back to America." 

"You want me to help you break into a party?" 

He looked up at me and quickly my shirt was filling his fist. "Yes." 

"Okay," I gasped. He let my shirt go and I held out the knife again. "Do it. You need it." 

He reached for the knife and stood up. He threw the knife in the sink and walked into the bedroom, slamming the door shut. 

I exhaled as I fell against the wall. My arm resting on my one raised knee as my other leg fell flat to the floor. The apartment was filled with whiteness. 

The color of innocence, the color of happiness. 

The color that hasn't seen Niall in years. He only knew black and now he got that taste, and he just wanted more. 

Whatever he was talking about with this girl, he believes is real. 

I'll do my best to believe it too. 

That's all I can do. 



Hi! Just a reminder that I opened a giveaway on my page! Go to my 'mumbles' to read more about it! morgan xx

{closes August 25} 

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