Just Under the Water [ BoyxBoy ]

Xavier may look like every other boy around: hair, eyes, the common human looks. Yet, inside, he's different from most males, he has a different gender preference, as in he's gay. Yes, he may be fine with this piece of information but that doesn't mean that everyone else is. So he's constantly bullied and hated for who he is. One day, when running from all those terrible people, he stumbled upon a painting and the boy, who is like no other, the artist. And just maybe the person who will help Xavier through his life.

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2. Too Much

To deal with the insults, I always twist it around so it doesn't make sense, you know, make it humorous. So it doesn't doesn't hurt at much.

But lately it seems like it's not working anymore.

It's seeming to get to me more and more. It's starting to hurt and slowly tear at the emotional walls I had put up. Now, the only place I feel okay is here, in class where no one can come and mentally tear me apart. Though, even that's not safe anymore.

"Xavier Cross," the teacher called and my head jerked up in attention. "Please come up to the from of the class and show us your project."

I stood and went to the front of the classroom, closing my eyes and cringing when everyone began to open their mouths

"Wow, look at him. He's wearing pink pants," girl A whispered.

Girl B snorted. "It's sooooo gay, it's disgusting."

Haha, ya. A guy wearing pink skinny jeans suddenly classifies that guy as gay. Yeah, makes perfect sense.

I opened my eyes, now in front of the whiteboard and slowly turned around. I began talking about my topic of interest, which was the Bermuda Triangle.  

As I talked about everything the whispered continued and all of it seemed to press down on me, pulling me under. It was almost as if I was drowning.

They continued, the rumors, the insults, the words that were killing me from the inside out. They kept going, going, going, and going ...

It was too much.

All of strength was gone as my emotional wall fell and crumbled. I had dealt with the bullying for too long. 

I had joked about being gay and everything people said but that could only last for so long, and now it stopped working and I was done.

My mouth stopped moving about the disappearing planes and ships, and I went quiet. Silence echoed across the room, the girls now not talking because my voice couldn't cover up theirs.

"Xavier?"

I ignored the teacher and ran out of the room, feet pounding across the ground as I fled.

I ran from the rumors.

I ran from the lies.

I ran from the people trying to kill me mentally.

I ran from the people that didn't understand.

I ran from my parents and from everyone else that hated me.

I ran from everyone.

I ran from myself.

I ran.

And as I sprinted down the halls I passed the art room and got a sight of that painting. So, as I pushed the main doors of the school open and continued to run, I imagined that hand as my own.

I had hung onto the ledge of that abyss and I just let go.

I had just snapped, and this time I probably wasn't going to come back together.

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