Saving Grace

Sometimes, fond memories come rushing back to you. But sometimes, those fond memories are what hold the most misery in your life.


1. Prolouge

Sometimes, fond memories come rushing back to you. But sometimes, those fond memories are what hold the most misery in your life.

"Hey blondie," were the first words she told me, as she slapped me awake. I opened my to meet glances with this silhouette of a girl with wild hair, spreading out in all different directions. She hovered over me with a smirk on her face, "Good, you're awake. Or else the cops woulda taken you into custody. You wouldn't want that, eh?" 

I shook my head, finding myself stoned on the front lawn, behind the girl, whose face was blurred, there were blue and red lights flashing and people rushing out of the house, with hopes of not getting caught smoking illegal drugs. 

"Well get off your ass and run," her voice sounded rushed, like she couldn't afford getting into jail. While I had trouble getting up, the girl, whose face I did not visualize, ran off. In an instant, I fell onto the ground again. The sound of keys clashing together come closer. 

A man's voice, who picked me up, said, "This one is out. You made the wrong choice, buddy." Shit. I'm in deep shit. 

After a series of me falling to the ground multiple times, I remember seeing a figure smash the police man's head from behind. He fell to the ground, as the girl's familiar voice scolded me, "C'mon, ya wuss. I told you to run, didn't I?"

Her response to my groan, was dragging me to somewhere safe, "God damn, you're heavy. What do you eat?" 

In what seemed like hours, the girl pushed me off her and onto the soft grass. Next thing, she collapsed next to me. And I was out. 


Dawn came and I woke up with a major migraine. The sky still partially dark, I sat up and a rush of blood clears my head, leaving me light-headed. I glanced to my right finding the girl 10 feet away, curled up in fetal position. Her skin peeked under her booty shorts and she shuffled and turned my direction. What a beauty she was. Never in my life have I ever seen a face perfectly structured as hers. Shaped eyebrows, plumped lips, dimples as she tightened the muscles around her mouth. The girl opened her eyes. You could just see the lust and angst dance in her brown eyes. Her facial expression was confused as I marveled at those mysterious eyes, "Please don't stare. Like seriously." She turned her face away from me and mumbles, "Why are you up so damn early? Its like 6. " 

My voice inaudible because I haven't spoken in hours, I clear my throat, "Where exactly are we?"

She yawns, "Can you just shut up for like 3 more hours? I wanna sleep, kid."

This girl was fierce, but I'm not the type of "kid" you'd wanna manipulate, "Sure, sure, I will, just tell me where the fuck we are!"

"To be honest, I don't even know," the girl chuckled. 

"Are you serious?!"

"Yeah, it's kinda my strategy. Run away and just go on with life from there."

Even from the start, this girl isn't someone you'd want to be involved with because she will get you nowhere. But being the stupid, foolish boy I am, I chased after this beauty. She was something. Yeah. She was something. 

"So what's your name?" I asked her, curiously.

She faces me again and smiles, "Peters. Jade Peters."

"Peters? Like Peter Pan?"

"No. Don't try," her smile fades, and that's when I notice the smeared mascara beneath her eyes. "How 'bout you, blondie?"

I inhaled deeply, "Niall Horan."

Jade chuckles, "WHORE-an"

"Heard that one before."

Jade starts to laugh, loudly, and next thing I knew I joined her. 

And that's how it was hit off. The whole spark of this journey that I'd be taking for the next year with Jade Peters. 

During that year, I learned many things about Jade. We got to see each other every other week. I had school and she was busy caring for her great-aunt. Her only family member left. You see, Jade's parents died in a fire that she had sparked, accidentally when she was 10. Through, that trauma, Jade had to live 4 years in an orphanage. At the age of 14, a couple adopted her, but as a teenager, Jade didn't like to be told what to do. She was going through a rebellious stage, but her "parents" didn't allow this, so they abused her and Jade couldn't take it any longer. So she killed them all. Its shocking, I know. But the way, Jade told me the story, she didn't sound regretful. And somehow, I just let it process through my brain as alright. Only because I witnessed my dad kill my mom, with his own bare hands. They were in a fight because my mom had cheated on my dad. So my dad went out and drank and came home drunk and angry and... stabbed her to death with a piece of glass. He was sentenced to prison. For life. So I spent the last 5 years of my life with my mom's sister and her family. They basically hate me. They're scared that I'll be just like my dad and murder everyone if I got pissed. That's why I'm never home. I'm either at my buddy's house or work, where I earn my money to finally have my own life once I was 18. Meanwhile, I was 16 during the time I met Jade. And my life wasn't going well before I met her. And believe it or not, life wasn't any easier with Jade in my life, but she made life more enjoyable. And I think she felt the same about me. You see, all Jade searched for her whole life was someone to understand and love her. And I was that one person in the world that could understand her and love her like no one else can. But there was one flaw that Jade had. She constantly had the urge to run away because that's all she's done her whole life. Run away. No more, no less. 

Being finally comfortable with someone, Jade meets me in the spot we always meet with a packed bag.

"What's...that?" I point towards the bag.

She says, scared, "Niall, there's something really important I need to ask you."

Confused at the moment, I let Jade talk, "What is it, babe?"

Exhaling, she took a seat next to me on this log next to the river, "It's been a whole year since I've met you."

"It has?" I look away, trying to avoid glances with her. 

"Yeah. It has. And over this period of time, you're the only person who has ever understood me."

"Mhm...," I focus on a bird, while still listening to Jade. 

"And Niall, I think I love you."

Pulling my focus away from the bird to look back at Jade's gorgeous brown eyes. And in that moment, I swear, I have never seen Jade smile so widely. But... I'm so scared to be involved with someone again. Because I know I'll just be hurt again. But trusting in Jade, I sincerely say back to her, "I love you, too, darlin'."

Brought to tears, Jade hugs me, "Niall, I've never felt this way about anyone."

"Me, too."

She turns my face towards hers and Jade kisses me. For the first time. That's right. Over that whole year, Jade and I have never kissed or made any kind of show of affection until now. I think we were just waiting for it. 

Jade pulls away, a smile on her face. This time, her eyes no longer danced with angst, but happiness. She's finally found her happiness in me. 

"So, Niall," she blushes. "Will away with me?"

In an instant, my smile fades, "Run away again, Jade?" 

Her happiness runs away, "What are you talking about? My whole life I've searched for someone to understand me. And I found you, Niall. You were the one who finally made me happy.  I thought you understood me. Now you're asking why I want to run away?"

"Jade...," I hold onto her wrist. "Babe, I would run away with you, but look, my life just got better." 

She pulls her hand away, "Your life, Niall. Not mine."

"Jade, if you would just stay with me, then our life would get better. But all you wanna do is run away, run away, run away."

She shakes her head and picks up her bag, "You know what? Nevermind. Why did I ever think that you'd actually run away with me?" She chuckles, sadly.


She smiles, holding back the tears, "No Niall, just don't. Don't make it any worse. It already hurts that I fell for you so hard, not thinking ahead that you wouldn't want to run away to my paradise."

"Jade...please don't do this. I love you."

That's when she broke down, "Oh, you love me, huh? If you really loved me, you'd understand my needs no matter what."

"I do understand, babe."


She starts to walk towards her car.

Slowly, I start to lose the one that I had loved. And possibly the only one I'll ever be able to love. 

Her last words were, "I really thought you understood me..."

No "I love you," or no "goodbye". Just plain, "I really thought you understood me..."

At that moment, never did I realize that I'd never see the one I had loved ever. 

She left me with the wonder: "Will I ever be able to love someone again?"






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