Does everything goes back to normal after a suicide?

Can life go back to normal when you best friend kill themselves? Do people expect that you get over it, just like that.
You just don't get over yet, not something like that.
You can't..


1. Just another day..


I looked around, everyone was doing their own things, but you could still tell that something was wrong because one person wasn’t there, one person wasn’t at her locker, talking to her friends, like always.


Her friends would now or then looked over at the empty locker, hoping that she wasn’t gone, but no matter how many times you could look over by the locker, she will never be there again, I even from a habit would look over at the locker and wishing she was still here, but I have to face it, she is never coming back, because a week ago.


She killed herself.

I still remember the day when we were told what had happen, it was the worst day in my life.

I left school running, I went by the bridge near my house, and I just screamed.
I was mad at the world, at the school, at the people who made her do it, but most of all I was mad at myself for letting it happen to her.
   “Argh” I have been so lost in thought, that I forgot that I was holding onto the side of my locker, and the side had cut my hand, I looked down at my hand.

  'Great’ I thought, I took a piece of white cloth from my locker and put it around my hand.
  “Really Charlie? Again? What it’s like the 3
rd time this week?” A voice said next to me, I turned my head and saw my best friend Alisa.
  “Hey Al.” I said and smirked at her, Alisa has been my best friend since we were 6. “It’s not my fault the locker is so scrap”
  “Noo, but it is your fault that you keep holding your hand so tight on the locker” she said. “Haha, every funny.” I said and shut my locker and we went down hall to class.

People still stare as we walk down the hall, I hated it and the reason for it, is because she was my best friend.


Alisa and the girl is my best friends. Everyone at school knows how close we three were, and now that she wasn’t here anymore , people stare because they expects me to go nuts.

I did last week, when her ex-boyfriend was talking trash about her, and I flipped. Her ex was a bit surprised because he hadn't expected me to break his nose, since I didn't play football like the other guys in our school.

I had Advanced English and Alisa had English, which is the only class I don’t have with Alisa, I use to have Advanced English with her.
I walked in and sat in my seat, and as a bad habit I looked at the seat next to mine, it use to be hers, I still remember the last time she had this class, I was teasing her about getting an A
- on her paper she did on a Sylvia Plath book.

By the time class started my smirked had disappeared and realized that she will never sit in that seat again.


When the bell rang and everyone got up, I realized that someone had been sitting in her seat, I looked at the person and almost dropped my jaw, because she looked like her. I know it isn't her, I know because I went to her funerale 3 days ago.
 “Can I help you with anything?” she asked, I shacked my head. “No, I was just lost in thought.” I said and left.

I had a free period and so did Alisa, so I went to ‘our place’ as we called it.


  “Hey.” I said as I closed the door to the roof.
Alisa turned around and looked at me. “Hey man, how was English?” she asked, I saw down next to her and looked out at the school. “Like uselessly, but there was a new girl today, she sat in her seat.” I said.

  Alisa knew what I meant when I say ‘her’.
  “Really?” I nodded. “The crazy thing is that she looked a lot like her. It was weird, I know it’s not her, but still” I said. “Yeah I feel like I see someone like her too. But she gone, it’s weird to think about.”


We sat in silence, “Do you remember the day her and Blake broke up? It took forever to get her down from here, but when you showed up, you just sat down next her and she wrapped her arms around and you carried her down like it was nothing.” Alisa said after a few minutes, I smiled at the memory.

It happen 4 months ago, Jessica, one of her friends had came running down the hall to find Alisa because she couldn’t find.. her, but Alisa just went up to the roof, where she was sitting and crying, Alisa called me a hour and a half later, telling me to get up and help her get her down.

“Yeah, seams forever ago.” I said quietly, I looked at Alisa and she smiled at me.
Rest of the period, we just sat in silence and looked at the school.

It seems normal, like everything was the same, not like that a week ago someone killed themselves.


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