She waited and waited, but he never showed up. She then went home, but the questions kept popping up in her head, why didn't he show up?


2. WHY?

I sat there waiting. Just waiting for you. Maybe you would show up later. Maybe you were busy at the moment and couldn’t come. Maybe you were on your way. I wouldn’t know. So I didn’t leave. I hoped. I prayed. I wished. I hoped that you would come. I prayed that you were on your way, and I wished for you to be by my side. None of it came true. I just sat there all day, waiting. Waiting for something that wouldn’t happen. Waiting for you, even though I knew you wouldn’t come. Morning turned to afternoon, afternoon turned night, and soon all the light disappeared. There I sat in the dark, on the steps where we met for the first time 1 year ago.

You didn’t show up. Why didn’t you show up? We were supposed to meet each other. We were supposed to start all over. After all we had been through, we would try again. We were supposed to try again. Where were you? I needed you. I still need you. I will always need you. I will always love you, just like I always have. I miss you. I need you.

Why did I show up? I shouldn’t have. I should just have stayed home, in my bed, where you couldn’t hurt me. Where you couldn’t do this to me again. I wish I never met you. I wish I never knew you existed. I wish. I really wish. Just so you couldn’t keep hurting me. I know you’ve hurt me a lot of times, and I know you will hurt me again, but I love you so much. I can’t let this go. I just can’t. What we have is love, whether you’re here or not. I love you, and I know you love me too. I know. Even though you haven’t said it before I know. I know you do. You have to. Otherwise you wouldn’t have done any of those things you did. You wouldn’t have brought me flowers. You wouldn’t have kissed me the way you did. You wouldn’t have stayed with me for so long. We wouldn’t have been together

But if you really loved me, wouldn’t you have shown up? Wouldn’t you have come so we could be together? But what if something happened. What if you were hurt. What if somebody you know were hurt. What if I had done something different. What if I had said ‘I love you’ more often. What if.

Maybe you didn’t love me. Maybe you just stayed with me to have someone. Maybe you just stayed with me to have someone to love you. Maybe. Maybe if I changed my self. Would you love me then? Would you love me if I changed my hair, if I got long beautiful blond hair? Would you love me if I changed my style, if I wore short skirts and tops? Would you love me if I changed my personality, if I was more outgoing and not afraid to show the world who I was? Would you love me then?

You need me. You miss me. You love me. Even if you don’t know it.

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