Underneath 2

Underneath 2 is the sequel to the story Underneath. If you haven't read Underneath yet go to my profile and read it before reading Underneath 2.

After going through a lot of struggle, confused minds and a twisted kind of love the famous singer Niall and the famous actor Athelia have finally found each other. But just as quick as the fairytale begins, the fairytale ends. Athelia's health aren't as healthy as they thought. After being told she only have one year left, the couple is forced to go through a year knowing it will be their ast. And it won't be without both fear and tears. How are you supposed to just live your life when someone suddently puts an expiration date on it? Who will stay strong and who won't? It's called through sickness and health, isn't it?

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5. Meet me on the other side

Athelia's P.O.V

 

I knocked on the door before I pressed down the doorknob to go in. Niall and Ashton looked up from the computer and smiled as they saw me. They had been sitting in this room the past hours working on some new tunes. In our new apartment Niall had gotten his own little studio where he could go when ever he needed to breath out or get his mind of something. Then he always went to his little studio to have a little fun with the music, so he could get the pressure of his shoulders if that was the case. It was his own little playground, and he loved being there. He loved just sitting there and doing something he was good at and something he loved.

"Hey baby", Niall greeted me. "You do know you don't have to knock right?".

He was about to get up from his chair before I cut him off.

"I'm gonna go paint okay? So you can just take all the time you want..", I smiled at them.

Niall nodded. "You're the best, we'll be done in a minute".

 

 

I slowly let the soft brush slide over the brand new and white canvas which I had placed carefully on the wooden easel. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes for a bit. I had been feeling a little dizzy the last hours, and was not exactly on the top today. But I hoped that painting a bit would wake up my creativity and make the dizziness fade.

I slowly and carefully stroke the brush along the white plate and it left a slight trail of navy blue. I then did it again but this time with a spring green. As I stroke the pencil along the white plate I couldn't help but making some slight waves in the otherwise straight trail. My hand wouldn't stop trembling slightly. I closed my eyes with irritation and breathed in and out before I eagerly continued making the straight strokes. But it was like it was impossible to make them straight. My hands were trembling, and I they were sweating too. It became more and more difficult to keep a hold on the pencil. I stopped painting and bite my lip hard trying to focus. But my gaze was getting shiftly and my hands were starting to shake.

"Arrh", I mumbled in anger and tried once again to make a long stroke over the painting. The stroke got blurry and not straight at all because of my shaking hands.

I slowly started to find it difficult to breath. It was like my lungs were getting smaller and smaller. Like the air was getting sucked out of them. I gasped for air.

"Stop it!", I screamed and slammed my fist against the painting.

All I wanted to do was to paint. Paint like I used to. Paint like I usually did. Was that too much to ask?

I concentrated as much as I could and attempted to make a circle with the a red pencil. It was impossible. My hands were shaking too much and my breath was getting heavier and heavier.

I desperately gasped for air and my left hand grabbed the edge of the table next to me keeping me from collapsing on the hard wooden floor. I closed my eyes and breathed in and out. The more difficult it got for me to even just get a hold of the pencil the more stubborn I got.

I wanted to paint, and that stupid sickness was not going to stop me from doing it.

I lifted my arm holding the pencil and tried just to hit the canvas. It was impossible. I just couldn't paint, it was too hard. I refused to believe it. Of course I could paint. I had always been able to paint.

Once again I tried making a simple stroke on the canvas but my shaky and sweaty hands kept me from it. All I could do, was a little slight dot of red painting. It made me furious.

"ARRRH", I screamed at myself in anger and felt the salty tears stream down my cheeks.

My heartbeat got faster and it made it hard for me to keep up with my breath. I snapped for air and felt a burning pain in my chest.

In a mix of anger and frustration my arm brutally struck out for the canvas and made it all collapse on the floor with a big crash. While screaming so it hurt my throat I kicked the table with all the colour tube's and as it fell to the ground the carpet beneath it got covered in light blue and army green painting.

I hated everything. The sickness. The painting. The pain. But mostly myself. I couldn't help but get so mad at myself for not even being able to paint one fucking painting.

It made me extremely frustrated realising I was unable to do the things I used to do.

"MAKE IT STOP", I screamed out between sobs. My body started to shake uncontrollably and within second I was lying on the floor crying.

 

 

 

Niall's P.O.V

 

I had just closed the door behind Ashton as I hurt the desperate screams from the painting room. Not screams of pain, screams of frustration.

My heart beat started to go faster as I with long steps and a nervous mind headed for the painting room.

"Athelia?!", I yelled as I ran down the hallway finding her lying on the floor screaming and sobbing of unhappiness. She was surrounded my a mess of painting and overturned furniture. It made my hard ache.

I instantly kneeled down beside her. "What happened?", I got out in an almost steady voice.

"I....I..", she sobbed. She could barely talk because of her heavy breath and small gasps now and then.

I had to quickly close my eyes and focus on not breaking. Seeing her like this didn't only break my heart it made me feel like my whole body was cracking to pieces. Like an earthquake was tearing me apart with a strength so powerfull I couldn't possibly defense myself. I was defenseless.

"Niall..I..I..", she said hiding her face in her hands crying loudly. Her entire body was shaking.

I wrapped my arms around her tiny body that felt so fragile.

"Sschhh", I whispered into her messy hair trying to calm her down. "Sshhh...".

She stopped sobbing, but her small gasps for air wouldn't go away.

As I held her in my arms I could feel her body shake uncontrollably.

"I...I..ca....can't d..d..o this anymore", she whispered between gasps.

Neither can I, I thought to myself.

I was a coward. I was weak. Too weak. And no matter how much I wished I could stay strong for her I just couldn't. I hated myself for being so vulnerable, but honestly I had never in my entire life expected that I had to go through something this tuff. Not only did I have to see her like this. I had to see her die. I had to see her disappear. I had to get over her some day.

I kissed her hair as I tightened my grip around her body. I slowly started to rock back and forth. I felt her gasps loosing their eagerness.

I wanted to sit with her like this forever. I wanted to hold her like this in my arms forever. I wanted to never have to let her go. It was like I felt that if I just held her in my arms like this with out letting go she would never disappear. If only we could just stay like this forever. Never having to face reality. Just sit here until she was healed.

"I love you", was the only thing I could get across my lips. I said with a hoarse and low voice like I was afraid of letting it out.

"Don't say that", she whispered as a lonely tear streamed down her red cheek.

"Why not?".

"It hurts", she just said and cuddled closer to me like she was afraid I'd suddenly leave.

I heavily breathed out and let my chin rest in her hair.

"Because soon I'll have to leave you", she then whispered.

Don't say that, I wanted to say but I couldn't. There was no right thing to say in a situation like this. You'll always be in my heart, I thought. But it was way too cliché. And to speak the truth, it didn't make anything any better. I'd never touch her again. I'd never hear her laugh again. I'd never see that glimpse in her eyes she always gets when she's truly happy. I'd never see her biting her lip slightly when she's concentrated again.

A quiet tear escaped my eye, but luckily she didn't notice.

We sad in silence for some time, me just holding her and her just calming down. Her shaking body had gone steady.

"Do you think.... I know that this may sound ridiculous but..do you believe in heaven?", she asked and looked up at me.

"I don't know. But I do believe that we'll all meet at some point after life. On the other side".

She sighed. "On the other side", she repeated with a slight smile.

"Do you?", I asked stroking her hair.

"A bit like you, I think heaven sounds so.... fabricated. The other side is way more simple. Maybe there is an other side. You know... another side where you'll never have to leave".

I nodded and leaned down to kiss her lips.

I'll try my best to stay strong for you. But I can't promise I'll succeed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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