Love is a Big Mystery

How can you get to know, how much you love a person? That’s the question Lauren asks herself every day. And she can’t find the answer without making a mistake. But if you aren’t making mistakes, you can’t learn of them. //This is a story for the English Class contest. It’s a challenging task for me to write in English, but it’s also a chance to make my English better. And as I said before: you need to make mistakes, if you’ll be better. So I would love, if you would leave a comment and give me some constructive criticism! I can take it all – both the good things and the bad things –, so just be as honest as you can!

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2. Love is a Big Mystery

Lauren puts the diary back at its place under her pillow and turns off the bed lamp. She tries to forget all the thoughts in her head, but it’s impossible. It’s overcrowded with all the things you can imagine in a 20-yeared old woman’s mind. When she’s too tired to stay awake she slowly falls asleep, though.

Dear Diary

I have a feeling that something special is going to happen today. Derrek’s coming to pick me up in the afternoon at 5 pm, and I’m very excited. He invited me out and insisted to keep what we’re going to do a secret. So I don’t know what to wear – a dress? or just jeans and a nice top? I think I’m going to have the first cloth emergency so far!

Lauren takes a comfortable outfit on – jeans and a cardigan. She decides that she’ll select the clothes for the evening when there’s only two hours left. She knows that if she tries to do it now it’ll take all the time until 5 pm. So instead of spending a lot of time on that, she makes a cup of tea and starts to read her favorite book, Fifty Shades of Grey.

The time runs and she forgets it. Suddenly she hears a sound, and it only takes a second to find out that it’s the door bell. She looks at the clock and sees what she doesn’t want to see. It’s exactly 5 pm, and she’s not ready.

Why is this happening to me? she thinks.

Lauren looks confused around one more time. She knows that she can’t let him wait – it’s not his fail that she’s late, it’s hers. There’s nothing else to do than open the door and see what happens. So it’s what she does.

Derrek looks at her while he’s smiling.

“Hi Lau,” he says and gives her a friendly hug. “Why do you look confused? Is something missing?” he asks.

I could’ve told it myself, she thinks and shakes her head resignedly.

“I’ll give you the story in the car,” she answers.

Derrek is the most thoughtful person she’s ever met, and sometimes it’s like he reads her thoughts. It can be very lovely when she needs someone to talk to. But when it’s about something awkward she hates it. While they walk down the stairway, Lauren notices that Derrek isn’t wearing a suit or something other very formal clothes. He’s just wearing dark blue trousers and a black shirt. So Lauren concludes that it’s not such a big disaster as she first thought that she’s just wearing jeans and a cardigan.

“When are you telling me what we’re going to do?” Lauren asks curious when they step outside in the fresh afternoon air. It’s May so the sun’s shining, and not until late evening it’ll go down.

“It’s a secret and it will still be that for a while,” Derrek just answers while he opens the front seat door and directs her to it as a gentleman. When they’re both in the car he says, “Would you mind if I give you a blindfold on?”

“Of course I wou-“ The words leave her mouth before she can stop it.

“Oh, I meant no, it’s okay,” she says fast. Derrek laughs and finally she also does. She allows him to put the blindfold on. Now she only has the hearing to try recognizing where they’re driving to. But as she promised she has to tell the story about her cloth emergency, so already after 20 seconds she loses the direction of where they’re driving.

*

“Wait here in the car,” Derrek says when he stops it.

“Can’t I take the blindfold off, yet?” Lauren asks.

“No, just wait. I’ll be ready in a minute,” he answers and leaves the car.

After a few minutes he comes back, takes her hand and guides her out. They take about ten steps and then Derrek says, “Now you can take the blindfold off.”

When Lauren sees the surprise she just stands starring with open mouth.

“Happy 15th years day!” Derrek exclaims.

“Are you kidding me? Is this just a dream?”

“No, it’s real, and I’m right here beside you.”

They stand in a clearing in the forest. But it’s not just a clearing. It’s the place where Lauren and Derrek met the first time 15 years ago, but Lauren still remembers, though. Derrek’s done a perfect job. On the ground there’s a rug laid with tableware, pizza and soda. In the trees, around them, there are a lot of candles. Even though the dark hasn’t come yet it’s very fascinating and beautiful. But the thing that really catches Lauren’s attention is two pink balloons that hover over the rug. She knows what these balloons symbolize.

 

I sat under a tree and played with some sticks I found in the forest. I’d already played for a while, so my red dress was a bit soiled, and my braid was rumbled. My mom had told me that she had to go and get some snacks I the car, and then she would come back. So there I sat waiting for her. Suddenly a boy on my own age came. He was on a walk together with his grandma. When they saw me sitting there under the tree, they asked why I was alone. “I’m waiting for my mother,” I said quiet. “Oh, such a young girl shouldn’t be alone in the forest. We can wait here until your mom is back,” the boy’s grandma said kindly. I smiled. They seemed very friendly. Then I saw that the boy was holding two pink balloons in two strings. “You may get them if you like,” he said and looked at me. I just stared at him, and then I nodded. He gave me both of them and smiled. Then my mom came back with the snacks. The grandma was kindly to her too, so my mom suggested to share the snacks with the boy and his grandma. When the boy and I were done we started playing and climbing in the trees. It was the funniest day in my life. And the boy’s name was Derrek.

 

“Are you hungry?” Derrek asks. Lauren realizes that her stomach is churning. She nods and sits down. Derrek has bought her favorite pizza: the one with shawarma. While they eat Derrek tells jokes, and they’ve fun. Lauren is so grateful for the fact that she can talk with him about everything.

When they’ve finished the meal Derrek asks: “Shouldn’t we take a walk while the sun sets?”

They start walking down a narrow path. The trees sway a bit in the light breeze. The birds are still singing, even though the sun’s starting to set. Lauren loves to be in the nature – it’s the most beautiful and peaceful place to be. And she is here with her best friend. Can it be better? But then she realizes that there must be a deeper reason to the dinner and all that with the pink balloons. And she can’t find another way than asking directly to find out. So that’s what she does:

“What’s the reason that you took me to the forest, bought my favorite pizza, sat up some candles and the pink balloons?”

“It’s because it’s 15 years since I first met you. I said it before,” Derrek answers innocent.

Lauren doesn’t trust him, but she says nothing. Again her head is overcrowded with the thoughts about how much she loves him. And none of them make sense. It’s confusing.

After 30 minutes of walking they’re back at the rug, under the balloons. Derrek looks a little nervous, but he’s still calm as he usually is. Now the sun’s completely gone, but the moon, the stars and the candles light up the evening.

“Here, take this,” Derrek says and gives Lauren a blanket because he can see that she’s starting to freeze. Then he puts his arm around her shoulder and moves quiet close to her.

Lauren doesn’t know what to feel. She likes that Derrek is holding her close, but it’s also a little strange. And maybe it’s not strange? She can’t decide. Hallo Lauren, c’mon, he’s your best friend! It isn’t strange!

“I need to try something,” Derrek breaks the silence with. “Close your eyes and just remain still.” Lauren closes her eyes and listens to Derrek’s breath. “Say, when you can feel me,” he says.

Slowly he’s getting nearer and when his lips are just a few millimeters away from Lauren’s, she says, “Now I can feel you,” and opens her eyes. An awkward moment arises and Derrek looks down embarrassed. But Lauren understands him, because she wants to kiss him, too. She wants to know her feelings for him.

When Derrek lifts his gaze again, Lauren looks directly in his eyes. Then she takes the chance. Her lips touch his. It’s just a soft kiss, not a wild, fiery one.

When Lauren retires she sends Derrek a friendly smile. And it’s just a friendly smile. Not more. Now she knows her own feelings for him. It’s just a friend’s feelings. It isn’t love feelings.

She is leaning toward him and gives him a hug. It’s a long one and she puts her face on his shoulder like a little child. There they sit for a while. The only sounds are their breath and the light breeze in the trees.

“I’m not in love with you. I’m sorry, but I can’t change it,” Lauren whispers finally.

“It’s okay. I don’t want to force you to love me. But you have to know that I’m still in love with you, and I think that I’ll always be. Even though I should get marry with another woman, then you’ll still be the first who stole my heart,” Derrek says.

“The kiss was a fail. It was my fail. I’m so sorry, I did it. I was just so confused about my feelings for you. I thought it was the only way to find an answer. Now I see that I should just have listened to my heart. Now I know that if you’re in love with someone you’re not in doubt.” She looks down sorry. But Derrek takes her face between his hands and looks at her with his smiling eyes when he’s saying:

“Love can be the biggest mystery I the world. We have to test ourselves. And sometimes we wish we could regret our mistakes. But if we aren’t making mistakes we can’t learn of them.”

“Thank you. Thank you for not being mad over my foolishness. Thank you for the best 15 years of my life. Thank you for the best day all time. Thank you for being my best and faithful friend. Thank you so much Derrek,” she says quiet. In a friendly silence they look up at the starry sky. It’s beautiful and full of bright spots as their friendship is.

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