My first love .

True story about my feelings and my "love" .


8. Seventh boyfriend , KYLE


We met in middle school, Oh man did i not expect to be with him... In high school, we started to talk more and he was in a breakup situation with his ex girlfriend and i was in a break up situation with my ex boyfriend Richard. Kyle and I were each other rebounds .. We even admitted it but what stopped us ? Nothing. He was the longest guy I have ever been with and it was the best times of my life . Even though i have cried countless times , he would never fail to make me happy. He was the boy i wanted to spend all of my time with . We were really close mentally and yeah . I just couldn't stop thinking about him.. He made me feel beautiful .. always telling me everyday how cute i am and everything. He just gave me butterflies every single time he talks or kiss or hugs me . He was half of me . His family knew we were together and my mom knew we were together.. I wanted him to be the first guy that would meet my dad but i guess i was wrong. :/ Him and I had lots of arguments after 4-5 months of being together. When i didn't like anything he did he stopped and fixed it just for me. What kind of guy does that? Not many. Just a few and he is one of them. He's the guy that shows his emotions physically and mentally which made me fall for him more. Seeing a guy cry doesn't show weakness it shows courage and shows how much they care. People can say he never loved me .. But a guy who's willing to bike to a house and wake me up in the morning, fold my blankets, wear pjs with me to school, feed me, sleep with me, hug me, cuddle with me, see me in the morning (SCARY) HAHA, take me places, gives me notes out of no where, gives me surprises, sing to me, webcam with me almost everyday, call and text most of the time, make sure i do my homework, be there for me no matter what TIME it was, sticks up for me, gives up his time for lunch just to be with me and most of all just love me for who i am and not trying to change me.  We trusted each other.. But we were too clingy to each other to the point where we wouldn't let one of us talk to opposite gender. Pretty stupid i know but if i could go back i would change anything just to be with him. Be with my happiness again .. I love him ..  love is undefined but i felt something with him that i have never felt for any guy. A guy who gives me butterflies and just loves me unconditionally. Accepts my flaws and just stick with me through all the times i treated him like shit. We were never on and off..  thats what i like about us :) he was the first guy i can actually eat a full dinner with :P <3 First date would be at KBBQ in valley . He gave me so much memories that i cant let go or forget but i am slowly . He was my light to fill up my dark word . He was the best .. Best i ever had so far.  I will never forget him .. No matter what. 


outcome : we tried to stay friends but i guess it was too awkward for us .. But i guess i know our "love" was something real to us . We see each other we don't really give a look or no face expression . I wish we were friends that way i could have him in my life ... But he's gone and i miss him .. I stil have feelings for him and it's been like 2 years that we haven't really talked. I couldn't get him out of my mind . Knowing that he wasn't mine made me depressed for a year and some months and even till today. I miss him . I miss kyle . I miss everything about him . Out of every guy of my life , he is the best boyfriend and best friend ever. No matter what he will always have a little piece of my heart that has been shattered. When he left, he took a whole side of me that i could never regain back . 

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