Secrets and Lies

Casey is a teenager with an amazing will to succeed. She is an incredible runner and is determined to enter a marathon. However it is not that easy. Her world is upturned as her friend's life begins to break down and only Casey can help, Casey is madly in love with a man she thinks will never want her and a sad turn of events results in a huge blow. But Casey is still determined to follow her dream...

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26. 11th September 2013

11th September 2013

We were on the way back to school now and it was nearing four o’clock in the evening as we entered our town. What a trip that was. Since the night Bruno and I had kissed, I don’t think I ever stopped thinking about him. We were constantly glancing at each other longingly but we never dared to show our feelings to each other again. It was far too risky. However I had never felt happier. It was wonderful to know that he loved me.

I had never felt so high in my life.

“Oh and before I forget, here are your phones back. One has been ringing like crazy for the past couples of day” Said Mr Wilson who got out a bunch of phones. He held up the still ringing one and asked whose it was. With a Niall Horan case and a blue HTC it was obviously mine.

I had completely forgotten about Amaya and Nico, but now my world came crashing down with worry. Hesitantly, I answered my phone; scared to death of what Nico was going to say. “Hello?” I said                                                                                                                                                                       

 “Casey! Finally, I’ve been ringing non-stop for ages! We need to talk! Are you nearly back?” he yelled obviously very angry and upset. What had happened?                                                                               

“I’m sorry Nico, just calm down. What wrong? What has happened? Is it Amaya? Is she ok? We are just pulling into school now. Are you there?” I panicked my voice raising and squeaking.                                                                                                                                                                “I-I-I u-m-m-m, we can’t talk now. Yes I’ve been waiting for an hour; I’m at the bus park. Find me quickly! And your parents are here too.” He said trying to remain calm but I could hear the tremor in his voice. What the hell was happening?                                                                                      “Okay, see you in a minute!” I ended the call.

My heart hammered so hard against my chest, it felt like it was trying to break my rib cage. When the bus parked into the bus stop, I was the first to run off not talking to anyone at all. There were cars everywhere and in the middle of the people were my family and Nico. None of them looked even a tiny bit happy to see me and their eyes shone with tears. Huge bags were eating away at their eyes and they looked exhausted. I had no idea what was happening. I was dreading what I was about to hear, an ecstasy of hysteria burnt through me.

They saw me and yet didn’t make a move towards me as if I was some sort of ticking bomb that was about to explode. I ran towards them expecting them to start talking, to explain, but there was nothing and no reaction. I was livid. Why couldn’t they tell me was wrong? “WHAT IS IT?” I yelled, not caring that everyone had started staring at us. I wanted to know!                                                      “Casey, let’s go home. We can talk over a nice sweet cup of tea” Trembled Mum, taking my shoulder and pushing me towards the car. What was she doing! Couldn’t she tell I needed to know now! And what was it with her and her stupid cups of tea?

“NO! I DON’T WANT A STUPID CUP OF TEA! TELL ME WHAT HAS HAPPENED NOW!” I screamed, begging them.                                                                                                                                                                  They knew I had cornered them into to telling me it, right here right now. It was coming any second now. I didn’t understand the mourning in their eyes, or their grief in their fidgeting. “Just tell her! She deserves to know!” Cried Nico who was walking towards me. And still nobody reacted as if they were trying to keep a colossal secret from me. The tension was making me insane. “Fine, I will!” He roared at my family.

He came so close to me that our faces were nearly touching and he took my hand. He whispered in my ear so quietly that only I could hear. “A-a-maya’s dead.”

No! How could he say that! She couldn’t be dead. She couldn’t be… But my parent’s faces confirmed the lie. How could she be dead? This couldn’t be happening…

“What… How?” I whispered. But I didn’t want to know.                                                                                 

“She took her own life, at the beach. She had passed before I found her.” He murmured the words I so didn’t want to hear.                                                                                                                                          

 “Why?” I asked dreading the answer I already knew. It was my fault. She committed suicide because of me. I shouldn’t have run away, I shouldn’t have left her so distraught, vulnerable and alone. What had I done?

I started shaking violently in Nico’s arms which were trembling and all the shock and pure anger rapidly bled out of my eyes. Amaya was gone. She would never come back. I would never be able to see her again… I would never be able to laugh with her, or hug her, or talk to her about things only I could talk to her about, or dance with her, or sing with her, or run with her, or sit with her. None of that.

I despised myself for what I had done. Wicked tears devoured my heart. I couldn’t hear anything; the world was silent. I was suffocating with grief. There was a hole in my heart which was empty and unforgiving. It could never be filled.

I don’t know how long I stood there but when I was numbly ushered into the car I felt nothing but emptiness. Everyone stared at me with pity but I didn’t want their sympathy; none of them knew her like I did. I could see Bruno fighting a battle inside of whether to come and hold me or not, and my parents began to utter meaningless words which I couldn’t understand. I didn’t want to listen; it hurt too much to hear the truth. Nothing would be the same again.

 

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