Out Of Darkness Into Light

My story is about four young people having complication with their life and also difficulties with their love life while growing up.

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6. Chapter 6 .

 

 

 

         Gavin P.O.V 

 

   So..my sister's finally back from rehab. Me and Steve should have probably went with her too..i mean both of us need rehab as much as she did and maybe actually more. Ugh..so Tavi..Yeah, we kinda broke up. Long story short ; She thought i was cheating on her. I'm so in love with her, i would never cheat but she thought otherwise. Maybe i should fight for her But then again she might not feel the same way anymore. I mean she's stubborn as fuck anyway. I never thought i'd be in love after..Sewin. I mean..she was the love of my life. I just still can't believe she passed away. I still miss her. But she's in peace now so maybe i should stop worrying too much. Tavi...i love her...i love her so much. I want her to believe me but she just wont give me a second to talk about it. We're back to being best friends. When she says something, it's impossible to change her mind so basically i'm screwed. Sometimes i feel like sewin is watching over me and thinking how could i be in love with someone else. I mean sewin passed two years ago and i have to live my life. I can't just be depressed like the passed two years. Right? I don't know. I can't believe my second love got screwed up for nothing!  Tavi used to thinks i'm just like other players when it comes to relationships. I proved her wrong until..well, our break up. I'm not a player i'm just...wanted by many girls that i'm not interested in and popular in school but i'm always judged anyway. One thing that sucks is that if i actually do wanna fight back for her she wont listen. She always has been stubborn. I tried many times to get her back and prove her wrong but she just doubts me and i hate it. I can't possibly have the most amazing person in my life think otherwise about me. She's wrong and she doesn't know it. I'm afraid if i even try one more time to fight for her, even our friendship will be ruined.  I just feel like i can't live without her. She's everything i'v always wanted. When i see her my heart beats really fast that i  realize that she probably will never take me back and the fact that i can't without her. She used to make me feel like i'm important and it makes me feel like i'm alive. I know because that's exactly how sewin made me feel. Don't get me wrong though, like i said i miss sewin but she's gone and it is what it is. And i have to start excepting reality. Anyway, i'm probably gonna try to get her until i succeed because i can't just want her and not say anything. I'm the man of my word and i'm telling you..i will get her back. Maybe not yet but i will. She's way too perfect for me to lose her. When she looks at me with those blue doe eyes i just .. melt straight up. And i'm so under her spell .. i mean they don't call it falling in love for nothing. 

 

             As i was drinking my protein shake to go to gym, she came down stairs. 

"Hey boo, going to gym?" she asked

"Yeah, wanna come with?" 

"Actually i already went this morning with Brianna. You know, your sisters pretty chill. I like her." 

"Haha yeah, she is." i replied

"If you ever wanna talk about it..i'm here you know that right? And since i'm like your best-est friend ever, you should tell me everything." She smiled and looked at me.

"Stop flattering yourself so much babe." i said as i laughed and smiled.

she just smiled and said "You love me." 

My heart skipped a beat and at that moment i had no idea what to say. I thought she wanted me back or something. 

" I do, baby i do.." i said as i looked into her eyes.

"You too" she smiled as she went in the living room and turned the t.v on.

And that's when it felt like someone just stabbed me like 5 million times. She meant it as a friend. How could i just think for a second that she wanted me back. I finally realized that i'm so friend zoned. God. I hate the feeling. I just finished drinking my protein shake and went to Gym. 

I came back home after 2 hours. It was 10PM. As i entered the house i saw Tavi going in her room with a guy. The only thought that came into my mind was that 'she has a boyfriend. So therefore, my life is over.' I went into my room and locked the door because i didn't feel like talking to anyone anymore. As i got into bed it was 10 PM i heard some one knocking at my door. 

"Go away." i replied. 

"It's me, let me in Gavin." 

It was her. I didn't know what to do or say so me being the naive guy that i am when she's around me, i just simply got up and opened the door.

"Whats up?" i said. 

"What's wrong?" she looked at me with those big beautiful eyes.

"Nothing. I'm just tired tav ." i said. 

"Oh..Ok. I was gonna say come meet meet my new boyfriend." 

"Boyfriend huh?" i said feeling terrible. Trying to control my tears. 

"Yeah. But it's Okay. You're tired so let's leave it for tomorrow. How about we double date?" she asked smiling.

"Oh come on Tavi. You know i don't date since you...and sewin passed. I mean look how amazing both my loves turned around nah?" i said while looking down and realizing at that very moment, i was hopeless.  

"Gavin, me and you were a few months ago. I let it ago, why don't you? Everything is so over. So why don't you try to forget about it like i have? And sewin passed like two years ago when you were 15. You have to let it go and just accept reality. You have to realize that she's gone and you can't be single for the rest of your life." she said.

"But i can't just give up on you Tav .. it might have been easy for you but it sure as hell isn't easy for me. And i will never forget you..what we had. I mean what we had was magic and you know it. You know you wont be as happy with anybody else as you when you were with me. And don't say i cheated on you because i'm still on my word : i - didn't - cheat . You obviously don't believe me though but i'm gonna get you back one way or another. And about Sewin I know." then i paused a little and said "Sorry but i can't come to the double date thingy." 

" It doesn't matter what i think anymore Gavin. It was over a long time ago. And right now...right now i don't wanna talk about it. I came here to tell you something else but for some reason you always change the subject to this every single damn time i wanna talk to you. And you don't wanna open your heart to another girl? fine gavin then don't. But just don't try to ruin my relationship with Kai okay? He's all i'v got right now." she said. 

"It matters to me tav ! Goddammit!! You fuckin wanna know why i change the damn subject every time? oh i don't know maybe because i'm in love with you and want you back maybe that's why. He's all you've got huh tav? Like i'v never been there for you?! You have got to be kidding me with this bullshit! You love me and you god damn know it! And oh i won't try to ruin it. Since the relationship is not meant to be, it'll fall apart on it's own." i said feeling hella angry.

 

"Haa. Are you serious right now? unbelievable! Unbelievable.You know i can stand here and argue about this with you all night long but it's pointless anyway." she said.

"Fine Tavi. Why don't you go with your new boyfriend and enjoy yourself?" i said sounding angry. 

"ha wow. Okay, good night Gavin." she said as she walked away.

"Sorry...I'm sorry." i whispered feeling and looking confused as hell. 

"No, don't be. I'm sorry for giving our friendship another try after our breakup. So if there's anyone to be blamed, it's me." she said. I could see the sadness in her eyes. I wish i knew how she exactly felt like right now. She turned around to go but i grabbed her hand and pulled her close to me. 

"i love you...i love you." i whispered in her ear. I saw a tear fall down her face. 

"You love me Gavin?" she asked. 

"Yes, baby i do! Just please let's give us another chance because i'll die without you."

"Then if you love me so much just let me go and be happy." she said and stepped back away from me and walked away. 

 

I came in my room right after feeling shitty as hell. I just found out that the love of my life hates me. I don't even think she wants to be my friend anymore. I kept telling myself that she'll come back and i thought to myself that 'Wow, i really fucked everything up huh? . Really nice job.' I didn't sleep the whole night thinking she's with someone else right now. They probably had sex too. Well, tomorrow is gonna be interesting. 

 

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