Out Of Darkness Into Light

My story is about four young people having complication with their life and also difficulties with their love life while growing up.

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19. Chapter 19.

   

 

            Gavin P.O.V

 "Hey..uh, i wanna talk. You got time?" asked Gavin. 

"Yeah, of course. What's up?" i asked. 

"So..i kinda wanna propose to Mia." he said.

"Wow..propose ha? I mean...if you know that you really love her and that you wanna go through with this for sure, i'm all for it. But, don't you think a year is kinda soon? I mean, that's my opinion and it would be only fair, if i told you what i think." I said. I was so surprised. I guess...maybe this is an end for them. I mean Tavi's already engaged to Matt, and Gavin wants to propose to Mia. Wow..i mean i'm kinda disappointed, i wanted them to end up together but you never know what your future holds./:

"I mean no..no i guess i don't think it's soon. I just wanna go through with it and get it over with you know." he said. 

"Well, i understand. But, do you love her, Gavin?" i asked. 

"Yes, i love Mia." he said. He lied. 

"I don't want you to lie to me, Gavin. Be honest. I'm not gonna run off and tell her that you don't. Come on, tell me." i said. 

"No, i know that you're not gonna do that and honestly, i'm trusting you and that's why i always come to you but i just need some advise." he said. 

"Gavin, i love you and as a sister i think that you're lying to yourself. If that's the case, don't hurt Mia. As time passes by, she falls more in love with you. Don't hurt her. But...if you really do love her, then yes, i say go trough with it but be careful while you're making a decision. It's abig fucking deal." i said. 

"I love her, Brianna." he said. 

"And i love Johnny because he's my best friend. But i'm IN love with Steve. Are you IN love with Mia? There's a difference. Don't full me." i sad. 

"Maybe...i guess." he said. 

"Okay, if "maybe" then don't marry her, are you crazy? You're supposed to be in love Gavin. Just because Tavi is engaged, doesn't mean you have to, too. Wait, and see if you'll fall in love with her. And if not, let her go. You're hurting her." i said. 

"I'm in love with Mia, and therefore, i will marry her as soon as possible." he said with a smile that faded away really fast.

"Wow, a smile in 2 years?" i was shocked. "Just remember, IF that's not the case, you're not fulling anyone but yourself. And the last thing i want for you is not to be happy. And as a sister, i'm supposed to understand but Gavin, i'm sorry, i don't think you know what you're doing." i said.

"I'm not lying.." he said. 

"No, i know that you're not lying but i just think you're not being honest with yourself." i said. 

"I'm happy, Brianna." he said. 

"And that's why you drink every night?" i said. 

"I..that's not because i'm unhappy." he said.

"Gavin, you can full EVERYONE, which you have fulled everyone by the way, because you can always pull off being happy and exited when in actuality, you're miserable and i give you props, but that's not how it's supposed to me." i said. 

He looked at me, and i couldn't tell what his expression was, like at all. Sometimes, well scratch that, most of the times, no one can understand his expression. 

"Look, you wanna marry her, then do so but be careful not to make a great mistake." i said. 

"I'm sure about it. I even bough her a ring." he said. 

"Oh my god! Let me see!" i said. 

He showed me, and it was just beautiful. I just really wish that ring went on someone finger that would make him happy. 

"Gavin, it's beautiful. She'll love it!" i said. 

He smiled and then his smile faded away fast.

"I can see that you're not happy..don't full me. Tell me what's on your mind." i said. 

"Tavi...tavi's on my mind. She's always fucking with my mind!" he said with a hopeless face expression. 

"And that's why you shouldn't marry Mia, Gavin! That's not fair for her..What, you think marrying Mia would make you fall out of love with Tavi? It's not that easy, gavin. And you know that. So, why do you wanna hurt the poor girl? All she ever did was love you, and now you wanna marry her while being in love with some other girl? Don't....not only you're gonna hurt her and destroy her, you'll lie to yourself, and hurt yourself too." i said. 

"Once i marry Mia, we'll go somewhere far far away." he said. 

"Oh so now you wanna run away from your lost love? What a pussy!  As a matter of a fact, you should stand here and fight it, Gavin! And not run away. You were so fucking strong, and right now i can't believe how just weak you are and that's disgusting me and everyone around you. Man the fuck up! " i said that to make him wanna be at least a little strong. 

"The love i have for her makes me so fucking weak and i admit it, alright? But i can't fight it, Brianna. I can't! I don't even think i ever can! That's why i wanna move away!." he said.

"And by moving away, you think that you wont ever think about her? Gavin, you're sadly mistaken. She's been away for 2 years, and you legit went crazy, especially on the first year. She wasn't around but.." he cut me off. 

"But she was still fucking with my mind." he finished my sentence up for me. 

"Look, all i'm saying is that if you think you can be happy with Mia, marry her Gvain. I will give you my blessings but don't if you're not gonna be happy with her and you know it, then don't." i said. 

"I've made my mind, and i wanna do it." he said. 

"Stubborn as fuck, i swear to god! Alright, Gavin. I wish you the best and i only wish, that you'll be happy in your life." i said. 

"Thanks." he said and left. 

 

"Can you believe it?" steve said. He looked pissed. 

"What happened, love?" i asked.

"Tavi!" he said. 

"What about her?" i asked.

"She's saying stuff like, it's been Gavin's fault all along and she talking like a bitch about him. And, we got into a fight last night." he said. 

"Babe, don't interfere! How many times did i tell you that?" i said. 

"But, i can't just stand there and see my best friend getting hurt and her acting like he's the antichrist." he said. 

"Look, we can't interfere with their fights, with their love life, or whatever it is that they're dealing with. However, we can guide them through it though. They either solve their problems on their own, or act like nothing happened and just ignore each other. There's nothing we can do, and their both fucking stubborn as fuck so just let them be as much as you wanna help. Okay?" i said. 

"But, it's not fair for Gavin." he said. 

"Look, you know how when they get into a fight, it get's crazy as fuck, right? Gavin just doesn't care to fight anymore. He gave up. And you can see it in his face. And these passed few years, both of us have been trying as hard as ever to work their problems for them but we didn't get any where and we wont. Just let them be for a while. And go apologize to your sister." i said. 

"Fine. Then let's not interfere. But if one of them ends up hurting themselves..or the other, then i will literally hit rock bottom!" he said.

"They're not gonna do that! I mean you saw how depressed gavin was these passed two years, he didn't hurt himself. If he can go through that then he can go through anything. And are you really worried about Tavi? She's fine and she looks happy as fuck." i said.

"Yeah, the last person that i'm worried about is Tavi. She's a narcissist. But what about Gavin?" he asked. 

"How you forgotten that Gavin is one hell of a narcissist too? He will never attempt something babe. Okay? Let's be positive." i said. 

"Okay, yeah he might not attempt anything but he can overdose like he did about 4 times already. The doctors said that if he overdoses again, then we might lose him, baby.." he said looking really worried and sad. 

" Listen to me, *i held his face* they'll be okay, babe. We're here, and we'll just watch him, okay? He's gonna be fine. And besides, he told me that he wants to Propose to Mia." i said. 

"Propose?! To Mia?!" he was shocked as hell. 

"Yes, he wants to propose to Mia. And i tried to talk him through it. And i said that if he doesn't love her, then he shouldn't because he's just gonna literally destroy her and keep on lying to himself and that's not gonna take him anyway. " i said. 

"Well that surprised the fuck outta me. But i mean babe, if he didn't love her then he wouldn't propose right?" he asked. 

'Well, i mean yeah but then again, maybe he's doing it because he feels like he has to since tavi's already engaged." i said. 

"Oh well that could be it too but i'm happy because one he married her, he's not gonna be depressed, right?" he asked, confused.

"Either they marry or not, if he's depressed, he'll remain depressed. Marriage is not magical to give him antidepressants." i said. 

"He always looks the happiest in public, but when he's alone, i'v noticed that he's really depressed. And when i talk to him, i just can figure it out. I just don't know what I could do anymore." he said. 

"Like we said, we wont do anything but help them and guide them through whatever they're going through. I'm gonna go get dressed to go to work, okay? Love you baby, and please please stop stressing so much." i said and kissed him on the mouth and went upstairs to get ready for work. 

 

It was 4:00PM when i went to work. 

 

      Steve P.O.V

"Hey, i'm sorry about what happened, Tavi." i said. 

"No need to apologize, i got over it." she said. 

"I just.." i said while she cut me off 

"I'm late on my date with Matt. So if you'll excuse me, i gotta go." she said and left. 

 

          gavin p.o.v

 

"Alright everyone, gavin has something to say so why don't we all come in the living room? " asked Steve. He knew I wanted to propose. 

As I came in the living room, everyone was there already.

"Mia.." I said . I was ready to propose but I just didn't feel right but I knew that I had to. It was too late too have backed out now. 

"Yes?" She asked with a smile.

I knew that I had to get on my knees now. I waited for a few minutes. The house was so silent. Thoughts were running in andout of my mInd so fast that I couldn't even catch up. 

"I need to tell you something.."I said.

"What is it baby?" She asked.

"I've thought about this for a long while now and umm...I don't think that I can do this anymore.." I said. I just didn't know if I said the right thing or not.

"What?! Why?!" She asked.

I figured thatI had to go all the way , meaning tell her the truth.

"Look, during the past year,I kept lying to myself...and you! I'm sorry mia I will never make you happy in life because...I'm in lovewwith....tavi. I'm sorry...but I just realized that I can't forget her. She means everything to me. I've been going insane since shed been gone these last two years. I don't deserve you...all I do is hurt people but what you all don't realize is that I'm already dead. You're beautiful, amazing, and sweet but I'm not the one for you. I never was. If I cant marry the love of my life then I rather stay single forever. I jut hope you understand..." I said. Wow...it was so easy to breath now. 

"What are you?! How could you?! While I was falling more and more in love with you every day, you were laughing at me?!  Gavin, I won't ever forgive you. Its been a year that wed been going out. A fucking year! You played me for so long and how could I have been so blind to realise. I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU SO MUCH! you know what you are? You're a fucking monster. Ijust truly hope that you never find love you narcisstic shit!"  she said in anger.

"Oh and before I go" she said

She slapped me once from my right face and said, "That's for lying to me and playing me" then she slapped me from my left side of face and said, "And that's for breaking my hard when you promised you never would!" She said and left

Ouch, butI deserved it. What she said and what she did, I deserved it.

Everyone were looking. Tavi and matt were there too.

I looked at everyone and left the house. It was a rainy night.

I saw mia taking her car and driving. 

Shit..she can't drive in this weather!

I sat in my car and drove after her car. She was driving so fast! I couldn't even see the streets, it was pouring! I kept fallowing her. I was worried! I kept calling her, she wouldn't pick up. She kept driving. I had no idea where she was trying to go. I keep fallowing her for 50 minutes more or less. Just then a big truck was driving  her way, the floor was slippery as hell. Thats when they both lost control! The truck flipped and it rolled on her car. Her car was flat and the truck was on it.

I got out of the car fricking out! "MIAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" I yelled in panic. I called 911. They got her out of the car and I have no idea how! They put her in the ambulance and I went with them to the hospital too. 

I had no idea if she was gonna make it or not. Although I broke up with her, I cared about her. I just felt so fucking guilty. I waited and waited..

 

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