Jane & The Shooting Star

Patrick & Jane have known each other forever, growing up in a town as small as there own, they grew close together from a small age. Patrick, desperately in love with his best friend, wishes upon a shooting star one night four years prior, and is still dealing with the aftermath. Under the impression that Jane could never love him back, he tries to battle with his erratic mother, failed attempts at jealousy, and the true meaning of what fate is all about.

Short story, rated Yellow for strong language.
© Copyright ‘Jane & The Shooting Star’ by GeorgiaLM 2013


6. 5

5Chapter Patrick “All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king.” - J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring My heart is in my throat as I lead Jane further down the beach, away from the gathering dark forms of people. Our walk is silent and nervous tension hangs thick in the air between us, but I try to ignore the weakness of my knees and stuttering of my heart. Her hand is warm and comforting in my own and strangely makes me feel safe and sure of myself. We stop and slip out of our shoes and walk close to where the water crawls to skim our toes. We stand in silence, only the waves and the wind to accompany our thoughts. I guess I’m just tired really, tired of wanting to be alone, but not wanting to feel lonely. Tired of wanting Jane so much when I know she doesn’t want me back. I’m tired inside myself, my bones feel too weak to hold my body together. I’m tired of not having anyone to confide in about this stuff, not having a mom’s advice about girls. And it just doesn’t feel good okay. When the girl of your dreams is standing right before you, bus is so desperately out of reach. “It’s better further out.” Jane says quietly. I look to her and she’s staring out towards the ocean. “It’s quieter out here.” “I know, I guess our train of thought hasn’t really changed much from when we were younger.” Jane laughs quietly and shakes her head. “Your right, I guess it hasn’t.” She looks up at me, searching my eyes for something, I don’t know what. She seems slightly lost, so I step closer to her. This is it, I think. It’s now or never. I lean in to her, slowly, so slow that I’m barely moving my head. But she notices and leans in a bit to. “What are you going to wish for?” her voice breaks through the moment and I pull back and so does she. My heart sinks because I know, she doesn’t want me. There had always been an inkling or a spark that she may have felt the same way. And if she’d kissed me, my inhibitions would have melted to nothing. But love, it’s strange in so many ways. It’s intense and scary and it almost hardly ever works out the way you’d imagined. But oh, how I’d imagined and how I’d wished on a shooting star for my own love. “I’m not supposed to tell you, remember.” I say, looking down at the ground so she can’t see the unbidden tears in my eyes that I’m trying desperately to blink back. “What are you going to wish for?” I ask and try to ignore the ache in my chest. She says something so quietly that I can’t hear over the noise of waves. I look up to her, she has tears in her eyes, her beautiful bright eyes. Her hair is pulled flush behind her, the wind pulling at her dark locks. “What?” I say. “I said,” she steps closer to me, so we’re only a breath a part. “I’m going to wish for you.” And then she kisses me. The wind rushes from my mouth and after a moment of shocked hesitation, I kiss her back. I pour everything into it. All the years that I’ve wanted to kiss her, all the times I’ve imagined pressing my lips against her soft pouted mouth, I do in this kiss. I wrap my arms tight around her and she holds the back of my head so my lips stay attached to hers. When her crotch presses against my own I groan loudly against her mouth. My tongue slips between parted lips and wraps around her own. She moans softly, a small innocent sound that sends shivers up my spine. We pull aways and gasp for breath, my mouth slack as I try to draw in air. I look down at Jane’s soft features, pale in the darkness. Her cheeks are slightly flushed and her emotions seem muddled together. “I love you Jane.” I say quietly, once I have enough breath in me. She lets in a sharp in take of breath and then kisses me again. Pressing so close to me that I feel her absolutely everywhere. I’m so lost in it, lost in her, and then she’s pulling away. Like my nightmares come to life. She pecks my lips once more, then, runs. “No! Jane!” I say, as soon as she’s left my arms. She takes off down the beach and my heart races as I run after her. “Wait! Don’t do this!” I yell after her. She’s not as fast as she was when she was younger and with my longer legs and faster stride, I reach her. I grab her hand and pull her to a stop. “Please, Jane, don’t do this.” I breathe out, trying to catch my breath. She’s struggling for breath herself, tears spilling over and down her cheeks. “I can’t do this, Trick. I can’t, you don’t-” she looks away and stares out towards the beach, her chest rising and falling rapidly. “Why can’t you see how much I care for you!” I yell, probably too loudly, but not as loud as I want. Jane snaps her head towards me and stares at me wide eyed and my breathing is ragged from running after her again. For chasing her when she goes, the continuum of kiss and run, and kiss and chase. My legs are tired and shaking, because I’ve wanted this moment and I’ve not wanted this moment ever since our first kiss, and I feel queazy and energized all at the same time. “Why can’t you see that I love you Jane! That I wish for you! Why can’t you just tell me you’re not interested, or pull away. Instead of kissing me like that and then running. We’re not 13 anymore!” I feel like crying and it makes me feel weak and stupid, and Jane looks both shocked and scared and so so fucking beautiful in the pale moonlight. “Because you shouldn’t have wished for me Trick!” she say finally, her voice as loud as mine. It slices through the noise of waves and the wind. “What?” I ask her, stepping closer. “Wha- What do you mean?” She’s struggling for words and there are tear tracks down her face that make my head hurt. “I mean, you shouldn’t have wished for me that night Trick. I’m not worth it. You could have wished for your dad to come back or your mom to stop drinking, or something worthwhile! But, instead you wished for me. And I couldn’t stand up for that Trick! I can’t be your wish granted, because I’m not what you want.” She says the last sentence quietly, but I hear her. I shake my head vehemently. “No, no. Jane, you don’t need to be my wish granted. There is probably no such thing, okay. Wishing for that other stuff.” I shake my head again, shuffling my feet. “That other stuff is bullshit, if my dad wanted to come back he would have never left, and if my mom wanted to stop drinking herself to death she would have stopped when she went to rehab or when I asked her all those times to stop. God knows I’ve tried to help her. Those sorts of wishes,” I look around me for words, I’ve never been good at spontaneous speeches. “They’re just, in.. vain. They’re not worth it. But you Jane, you are worth it okay. And you don’t need to be anything to be my wish granted, because being who you are, whether that be as my best friend or my girlfriend or my wife, it’s my wish and it’s been granted.” Jane looks lost and I step closer to her, so we’re only about a foot apart. I take her hands in my hand and place them over my heart. “I wished for love, and I found you. That’s my wish granted.” So I crush her against me, my arms tight around her. I hold the back of her head and smooth down her hair. “I love you Trick, I love you so much.” She mumbles into my shirt, over and over after every shuddering breath. “Oh God Jane, I love you too.” And then finally, after a night of waiting and running and too much crying and a little bit of kissing. From the corner of my eye I see the star shoot across the night, bright and bold. Jane doesn’t see it, with her face pressed into my shoulder. But I do. So I make a final wish, probably the last wish I’ll ever make. I wish that whatever happens, that one day I’ll get to stand on a beach like this, with my wife - whether that be Jane or another girl that I love - our children at our feet, and be able to wish for nothing, because my everything is right there with me.
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