A White Rose

Even the brightest star can succumb to the darkness.

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1. A White Rose

 

They all said he wasn't right for me, it was almost as if they could tell from the moment they met him and to be honest I see where they were coming from. I was so pure and innocent, little Kathryn who’s never done anything bad and never will, Kieran was just the opposite. From the moment I met him I knew he was something I’d never come across before and more than anything that scared me to the core; but it thrilled me all the same.

                He was running. Away from home. Away from the law - I can’t even remember which now – he was running and then he fell into me. He pushed me back onto the hard, cold concrete as he tripped. It was only a second that our eyes met, but we made a connection and then suddenly, almost as if I’d been doing it all my life, I was running with him, chasing through the streets with the wind in my hair and his hand dragging me along.

He claimed that he’d taken me with him to stop me from being questioned by those who followed him, but I didn't even care why he’d done it. I was just glad that he had. For the first time in my life I’d seen the slightly darker side of the world and it was something I wanted to visit again.

After that we spent our days, bathing in the sunlight just talking and being together. We spent our nights hiding in the shadows of bars and living the life I had never even known could be.  He was the yin to my yang. My polar opposite and yet my complimentary force.

For long time I didn't tell anyone about us, it was our secret and that was important to me. It was only when we started to get serious that I decided to tell my parents about us and tried to arrange a meeting.  Kieran was resistant but I finally managed it.

I thought that it had gone well but as soon as he left my parents tried to stop me from seeing him again, I don’t know how they could tell that he had a dark side, he had been the perfect gentleman all day. Maybe it was just their intuition but no matter how they knew or what they said, I would never listen to what they told me. I would never stop seeing him, I loved him and I thought that he loved me...

We stayed in blissful harmony together for months never needing anything more than what we had together, just being together. There were good days and bad days and then there was a really bad day. Something had gone wrong in the life that was so dark that even I didn’t know about it, a deal had bust and Kieran was mad. Mad at the people who’d done it - because they’d ruined everything. Mad at the world – because it never seemed to give him a break. Mad at me for no reason at all.

It was just a second. A flash in his calm, dark exterior and I know it didn’t mean anything, but the harsh sting against my cheek still hurt and the bruise that rose there a week later was still hard to hide.

I brushed my hair over it and pushed it away with excuses saying it was a onetime thing, he’d never do it again; it was just that one night, until it wasn’t anymore. Every night was a bad night and every time it was my fault.  I believed him when he said it was. I hadn’t been supportive enough. I hadn’t moved fast enough when his fist approached and most importantly I hadn’t given myself to him, not in the way that he wanted.

And that’s why he took it. Stealing it from me when I was already weak and tired; not able to fight back and through every moment, every second that he tortured me and my soul, I still loved him. For weeks after I wished that I had stopped him from walking out and leaving me. I missed him and even now that I’m healed - physically and almost mentally - I still cry for him when I wake from a dream where he’d pull me away again and we’d run away into the night; dodging the light and the police; letting the dark engulf us in its sweet embrace. But that’s the thing about the dark; you can’t see what’s happening until it’s too late...

The night’s so secretive; so silent and deadly, that it can even turn a white rose black.

 

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