Justin Bieber Parody

DO NOT READ IF YOU LIKE JUSTIN BIEBER. This is all for fun. Do not get offended and if you might get offended DONT read.

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1. Me and Justin

**Authors note, 
This is a warning. If you like Justin Bieber, STOP READING RIGHT NOW. Ok I warned you.**

 


It all started one day when I was working my normal shift at Starbucks. I heard the door bell jingle. I look up and see the most amazing sight ever. A boy with thick eyebrows, pant down to his knees, oh he's very scrawny with a beautiful hat on and a wife beater. "Hey babe. Can I have a cup of decaf coffee?" He asks. "Yeah sure!" I say calmly even though I am freaking out on the inside. OH MY GOSH HE'S JUSTIN BIEBER. I FUCKING LOVE HIM. I give him his coffee and he says, "Hey do you maybe wanna be my next beard?". Oh my gosh! Justin Bieber wants me to be his next beard!!!!!!! "Yes I would love to!!" "Ok great! I'll see you at my house around six!!" He gives me his address and walks off. 

After work I get ready to go to Justin's house. I wear my prom dress because I want to impress him. I get to his house and knock on his door. His house keeper answers. "Oh hello dear! You must be the next beard!" "Yes I am!" I say happily. "Mr. Bieber is almost finished! You can wait outside his room for him!" "Ok!" 

I walk up the start and sit outside the room that is his. I make my dress perfect around me. It is pink, with puffy sleeves, and it is about ten feet long! I hear voices from his room. "Oh yeah Justin!! Don't stop baby!!!" I hear a boys voice say. I hear banging on the walls and a bed rocking. After about ten minutes Justin peeks his head out of the room. "Bill!!" He screams. A man whom I guessing is Bill arrives. "Assist Christian out." "Yes sir" Bill says. "Oh hey." He says to me. Bill comes back with a wheelchair. He walks in the room and comes out with Christian Beetles in it. "By baby." Justin says and kisses Christian on the lips. "You can come in my room if you want!" I get up and walk in his room. "That's one ugly fucking dress." "Thank you!" I say. 

He says, "ok here's the deal. You and me go on dates in the most public places. I kiss you in the most public places. We want the paparazzi to take pictures of me to hide my inner fagness. After a year and a half. We will break up and I will never see you again. Got it?" I nod. "Good now go away." I leave thinking about how lucky I am. This is defiantly the start of something beautiful.

**Author notes.  
I really hope you listened to my warning and I hope I didn't offend anyone. This is just for kicks.**

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