shy (all ages)

(True story) From the start of Secondary school I never really had much friends I was sad and all but I had to pull myself together I wasn't that much upset to do terrible things to my life. I was mostly (as you call it in my school office ) a medical conditions kid like mostly out of school for the hospital appointments and things like that because im Epileptic. But I have a great Family like a funny sister
and funny cousins.

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2. 1st day of school and up to now

I hate to admit it, but I was scared, it's as if notices and reminders kept popping into my head saying, 'try to mingle', 'don't get lost', 'be cool' and 'don't get bullied' but it doesn't work that way. Sometimes when your in a really bad situation you feel like your going to scream at the top of your lungs "What did I do to deserve this!"  At the beginning I had no friends, now I still don't have any friends, well maybe one or two, but who knows, they could still turn their back on you when they have the chance. Sometimes I feel like im not even there, like im in a little box saying " Hello, I want to be your friend "or" Hi, can we be friends? " but they still can't here me. Everyday I have to take these little 300 something tablets called Epilim. It helps me with my Epilepsy. I really don't mind them, but when i'm moody I feel like I want to throw it away and not take anymore because it really gets me annoyed. I have to take it every morning and every night after my food, but it taste like raw fish like every other one does, it's so disgusting. There's this girl in my class that's always grumpy. The things she says to me gets me so annoyed I just wanna shout in her face, 'DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH ME !!!???' The thing that also gets on my nerves and makes me upset is that everytime my teacher says find a partner they all grab one and leave me out as the usual like ... these two girls Sarah and Karen, they should stick together because they have been 'BBF'S for life !!' Oh and these other two girls, Shevarnee and NDY, they are both really tall (shevarnee is 5"9) (NDY is 5"11) yes I know 'WOW! SHOCKER!!' they're really tall for 11 & 12 year olds. I don't think they like me, I think they're just hiding it, for example: If i gave Shevarnee money she would all of a sudden be my best friend.

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