Fucked up (1D)

The 17 year old Mary Jane Moore, lives a normal life - until on her 17th birthday, where her loving parents tragically dies in a car accident. The young man behind the opposing car survives - but he is no ordinary boy. What will happen when Mary Jane is forced to meet the "killer" of her parents? And what will happen to her after her parents death?


50. Finally

Harry Styles P.O.V

"Look, we have to make this tour happen, even though I doubt it's what anyone wants right now!" Niall said, walking out in front of all of us.

"This is not what this band will end like! No matter what we feel, this is our job! We do this for a living, for christ sake." His pearly Irish accent was furious, and I could feel his gaze specifically on me.

"Dance! Sing! Be happy! At least pretend!" he said, his eyes shining with anger at the four boys in front of him.

"COME ON!" he said, as the music blasted. No one moved.

"I can't do this."  Louis said, sitting down on a chair close to the others.

"Me neither." Zayn said, giving up as well.

"I guess this is it." Liam said, totally discouraged by the rest of the boys. Niall looked at me, waiting for me to say something. I just shook my head, unable to say anything that'd make sense.

"Get over yourselves!" Niall said, trying to get us all to stand. I stood up, and Niall looked at me, surprised.

"I just can't. Not now." I felt like screaming. Screaming at the boys I was sorry. Telling Liam I was terribly sorry for not being there during his break-up. Telling Zayn I was sorry for speaking to him that way. Telling Niall I was glad he still had some sense left. And telling Lou I hadn't quite forgiven him, but that I was ready to start over, if he wished to. But at that time and moment, I couldn't. Someone far more important were probably ruining herself in her flat, all alone, drowning her sorrows, cutting away the pain. I shook my head, trying to get the tears to stop coming to my eyes. Too many tears had been cried already. But it was hard not to fall in - hard not to just break down and never think, love, do anything again. Niall looked at me, and for the first time since last week with Mary, he seemed worried. He nodded, like he approved of me, not being able to focus these days. Then I turned around, and walked to another room, closing the door after me. Normally the boys would've followed to cheer me up, and to be there for me, but these days, you could smolder away right in front of their eyes, and they wouldn't even talk to you. It'd never gotten this bad before.

I sat down on a chair, as the pain started flowing through my body, a huge lump forming in my throat, as I had trouble with breathing probably. Why had I left her? Why? I took out my phone, checking for calls. She hadn't called me in three whole days, making me wonder what'd gone wrong. I went to my contacts, debating whether or not to call her, to tell her how sorry I was, what a big mistake it was for me to leave her. My thumb hovered over her number for a while, deciding to call or not. I pressed it, and put the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" I asked, waiting for a reply.

"Hello, this is Ella speaking, what may I help you with?" Ella. I thought for a moment, where I'd heard that name, and then it hit me… Aunt Ella. 

"Ella, this is Harry Styles, can I please speak to Jane?" I asked. Ella was probably just there to keep an eye on Jane, so she wouldn't hurt herself. I took a deep breath, focusing on the task for a moment, as the thought of Ella being there with Jane calmed me. What was I going to say when Jane got on the phone? I love you, take me back? Doesn't matter, no matter what, that's what it was going to end with. For a moment, there was silence on the other end.

"I don't know how to say this to you, Harry." Ella said on the other end. I listened carefully, my heart starting to speed up, as I got nervous.

"Jane passed away a couple of days ago."

My heart felt like it stopped beating, and I felt a sudden need to try and catch my breath, as if I was choking. I dropped my phone on the floor, as I stood up, trying not to fall. My head was clouded, and I felt like I was going to scream. What? WHAT? I tripped out the door, and dragged myself against the floor, curling up into a ball, trying to disappear, trying to hide myself in the carpets, to never come out again. The door opened, and Lou entered the room, and took one glance at me, as he rushed to my side. All differences to the side, and past forgotten, he got down on his knees, trying to communicate with me.

"Harry, talk to me, what's going on?!" he said, his voice panicking. The tears were streaming down my face like an endless waterfall, as I started shaking violently, not being able to move myself. I opened my mouth to tell Louis what it was, but I couldn't get the sound out. She was gone. How could she be gone? After all we'd been through? After all we'd been through? I squinted my eyes shut, not wanting to ever see light again, and I slowly tried to choke myself, even though I knew it wouldn't be possible. Then I opened my eyes, and looked up at Lou. I looked him in the eyes, and I immediately saw that he understood.

"Oh no…" he trailed off, and I could sense the hurt in his voice, as he moved away, resting his back against the wall, his face in his hands.

"Oh no…" he said again, his voice dissolved in tears, as he started sobbing violently. Niall opened the door, looking for why it'd taken so long, and he understood just by looking at Lou and I.

"No." he said, shaking his head, as a tear dripped down his cheek. Liam shook his head, trying not to cry. Zayn almost broke down like Lou and I. And there we were, five british famous boys, all bawling our eyes out over a girl. A girl who two of them'd fallen in love them, and three of them had befriended. And that was quite painful. It was quite something.


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