My Love

One Direction:
The World's most famous boyband. Girls worldwide love them - some may even be in love with them.

Louis Tomlinson had already broken many girls hearts, simply by dating his beautiful girlfriend, Eleanor Calder.
Louis always had feelings for someone else though. And one night, in the middle of it all, it suddenly hits him.

Not only has he fallen for Harry Styles, ever since the day he met him. He now realized, he loves Harry.

-

"Please... Harry. Don't do this to me. I swear, this is just like a bad flue; I'll get over it!" I almost cried while my voice broke, it has officially let me down.
"Louis... I'm sorry." His raspy voice sounded hurt. He avoided eye contact with me - both knowing he'll break down, if he looked into my eyes.

And that was it. Until this day today, he's been avoiding me. That's the last memory I have of him. The last memory of My Love.

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1. True or False?

I just sat there, staring at him; I couldn’t keep my eyes away from him. He was so… beautiful.

“Louis, are you okay?” He murmured to me with a worried look on his face. For a moment, I just got lost in his eyes – letting myself memorize every single detail about them.

“Umm... yeah. I’m fine, I swear,” I whispered back. He gave me a smile, but no dimples were showing. I actually got extremely disappointed about that. He leaned back, resting his arm on Zayn’s shoulder and looking at the interviewer again – I could tell he was into her, and I absolutely understood him. She was pretty, but not my type.

“Louis, would you mind answering the question?” The interviewer suddenly said, capturing my attention for the first time in quite a while. I think her name was Isabelle.

“Pardon, my mind was wandering off for a second there. Could you repeat the question?” I gave her a friendly smile. She nodded, returning my smile.

“True or false; Eleanor Calder and you, have officially broken up?”

Out of nowhere, I actually began to laugh. No-one understood my sudden action, even the boys thought my behaviour was weird; I could tell by the looks they gave me. Actual tears were starting to fall down and I had no idea why, I laughed for no reason at all.

I quickly wiped them away though, after that I started to calm down again. Shaking my head.

“No. No, we’re still together.” I smiled once again to her, but she didn’t return it this time. She obviously thought I was rude, but I swear it was not on purpose. I only laughed, why is that so bad?

 

The interview ended and I caught Harry going up and saying something to Isabelle. My eyes fell on his lips, trying to find out what he was telling her. Something about wanting her number, I think, but that didn’t surprise me.

 

“Babe, are you ready to go?” A familiar female voice asked me, I turned around and my eyes immediately found Eleanor standing in front of me, with a smile on her lips. I couldn’t help but take an extra, good look at her eyes. I like her eyes, but they’re not as beautiful as Harry’s.

Her eyes are brown, Harry’s are green. I prefer green.

“Yeah, just give me a minute.” I leaned in and gave her a quick kiss on the check, before walking towards my friend. He didn’t even notice me, until the pretty blonde interviewer left.

“Oh, hey. Didn’t see you there.” He said and finally chose to give me some dimple action.

“Flirting with the interviewer, I see. Stop making me so jealous, Styles!” I laid my hand on his torso and playfully pushed him away. He started giggling, but it was more like a beautiful musical to my ears. Without saying a word, he pulled me into a quick hug and then walked towards the others. It was a short and definitely not a meaningful hug, but it still made my stomach feel like I ate the entire gymnastic team and they were now practicing for the Olympics in my stomach.

 

Now, before you come with all your conclusions on my behaviour, I’d like to put in the fact that I am not blind nor am I dumb. I am completely aware of my actions and my feelings towards Harry. I’ve had those feelings since I met him. Since the first time I saw him.

But the point is that Harry doesn’t like me that way, even though he’s definitely bisexual (that little fucker dare to like boys, but still hasn’t fallen for me yet) and therefor I chose to move on. And that was when I asked Eleanor out, for the first time. I clearly remember how I mentally prayed, every day, that I would get over him and fall head over heels for Eleanor. But no. Fucking. No.

 

I’ve learned to live with it though, but the tears always get to me when we’re on tour.

He has to bring a girl back to the hotel, after every concert. He can’t even stand a week without sex. But that’s not the worst part, the worst part is than on rare occasions, he brings a fucking male back with him. Of course my room always is next to his, so getting the ultimate VIP – treatment, I get to hear them moan and sometimes even break the bed. And I don’t give two shits about how much you “understand what I’m going through,” – you don’t. We all react to the same situation, in complete different ways. No matter what, I could never have someone who would fully understand me. Someone, who fully would understand the pain in my heart.

No-one knows how many times I considered taking my own life, instead of just lying there hearing the person who is responsible for the smile on my face every day, being with someone else. Someone, who isn’t me.

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