kiss me i'm irish

Young Adam lives in his own stupid teenage world. When will he ever wake up and smell the pimple cream? And what is the truth behind all the lies about his fake irish girlfriend Moose?
Is Moose a real name anyway?

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7. how ridiculous can one get?

So now we had yet another issue on our hands.
"You're a liar! A jackass! A complete jerk! A monster! That poor sweet irish girl..."
"Hold it together Douglas, I'm sorry you had to find out this way."
Gena punched me in the shoulder, still holding the part of her face, Douglas had hit.
"It was a one night stand," I lied, "Clara..." I choked, "I mean Courtney," I wasn't giving her real name, "Wasn't even looking for a boyfriend. She's moving way," half was true, "And - and I'm going to tell Moose not to come down for St. Patricks day because I know she'll never forgive me."
I felt Gena relaxed. Our wild moose chase was at an end.
"Why did you do it?" Douglas questioned, sqeezing my arm. Gena was playing with her septum ring, pulling it out and putting it back in.
I let out a fake whine.
"These long distance relationships are so difficult man - you've got to understand me? How would you feel? I haven't kissed Moose in half a year! Half a year! I needed someone to hold, to kiss. Cla - Courtney kissed so much like Moose. And it was never going to turn into something special anyway." I dropped my head, shamefully.
Douglas patted his chest. "You shouldn't cheat." I dropped my mouth. This was Douglas speaking. How many girls has he cheated on, I wonder? He's not in any position to tell me you shouldn't cheat.
"It wasn't planned..."
"How long have you been seeing Courtney?"
"I said it wasn't planned..."
"So just one night?"
"A one night stand. And it's over now so can we all take a deep breath and be done with it."
Douglas wrestled with his thoughts.
"No." He stated. "No. I want Moose to come down on St. Patricks day and hear you apologise. And - and - and I'm going to be her shoulder to cry on." - yeah. That was the Douglas I knew. I KNEW there was something he could get out of all this.
I looked at Gena. We exchanged worried glares.
"You see Douglas," I began in my it's-a-matter-of-fact tone, "It wouldn't be fair to Moose to drag her all the way down here just to break with her so you can get the benefit."
Douglas wriggled his shoulders.
"Don't you think you owe me? And Moose? Moose is going to feel lonely and it's cruel to break up over the phone or in a letter or something shallow like that." The normal Douglas was gone again. "A girl needs an honest man." Where was Douglas? "And I'm going to BE that honest man, Adam. And there's nothing you can do about it."

And it was then I realised the wild moose chase was back on and now I knew how desperate I had to be.

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