Paper Planes {One Direction}

Esther Bane was a completely normal human being, and a beautiful young teenage girl, until the day of the tragedy. The day changed her in the blink of an eye, and she soon found herself in support group once a week, trying to wake up from her nightmare of what happened that night in London. The night of the murder. The night of the nightmare, that kept hunting her night after night. Though Esther does have one happy thing left in her life, and his name is Harry Styles.
*Male lead bears no/very little likeness to the real Harry Styles apart from appearance*
[One Direction non famous]

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10. Not a normal Monday

Monday… despite being out of school and trying to get my life on the right track I wasn’t a Monday person, because it meant a new beginning, for me that was just another phrase for my mum to get me to try even better. I looked around the room. The sun was annoying my eyes as it was peeking through the curtain and asked for permission to enter the room.

I robbed my eyes and looked around the room before I pulled the covers up to cover my head. That’s when I realized mum was speaking with someone out on the other side of my door. She seemed angry.

“No you can’t enter! She’s finally sleeping and she’s actually had two good days where I haven’t fought with her to eat!”

“You don’t understand; I can make it disappear.”

“Harry, leave her alone.”

Harry?! He was here?! I jumped out from the bed and threw myself across the floor and got a cut lip from being too eager to get to the door and into his arms. I was on my knees when I opened the door. My cuts all over my thighs were showing, but I didn’t care. He had gotten my messages and knew I needed his help to get over the fear of the speech.

I opened the door and used it to climb up and make myself stand. The taste of blood was filling my mouth, and I was sure I looked really messy, but I didn’t care. I didn’t care as long as I got the hug I needed from him.

“Harry.”

My voice was fragile, and I must have looked like a mix between a corpse and a zombie, with the way too big knitted shirt covered up my fragile, little body.

“Esther.”

He wrapped his arms around me, not looking at the blood on my hands and my lips. We stood there for eternity before he let go of me and looked down at the bruises that was slowly starting to show on my knees from my stunt.

“What did you do to yourself?”

He looked straight into my eyes. It was like he was looking deep into myself and could see everything that I felt, and everything I had done. This was the reason I couldn’t lie to him. He was too fucking perfect and smart to believe in my lies.

“I fell across the floor, on my way out of bed.”

I saw my mum face palming herself and making me realize she had been there the entire time, just waiting for answers to everything that had been going on with me.

“I need to speak with you Esther.”

“What about?”

“You better get ready. It might take a while to explain. We’ll go out for coffee and I’ll explain it to you.”

“Sure?”

I went into my room to pick up some clothes before I ran out into the bathroom. It didn’t take me long to shower, but I made sure that it was a great shower anyway.

I put on the silk underwear my dad had gotten me just a week before he died and looked at myself in the mirror. My collarbones were showing off a lot and it was easy to count my ribs. I ran my fingers over my body, feeling fat, yet too skinny. What had gotten into me over the past days?

I heard someone knocking on the door and I looked at it, scared that someone would see the countless scars showing off all over my body. Even the fresh ones that was printed to my stomach.

“Esther? You okay in there?”

“Yeah, just give me a minute.”

I found the skinny jeans with Aztec print and pulled them on. They had a high waist, and the denim against my stomach made the wounds sore.

“ahh.”

I squeezed my eyes together because of the new unpleasant feeling, before I pulled a huge beige knitted shirt over my head. I put on the black socks, before I looked myself in the mirror again. My hair was pulled back in a bit of a messy pony tail and I didn’t wear any make-up at all. I brushed my teeth and washed my hands before I took just one more look in the mirror. I was disgusted of myself, of the view in the mirror, but I wanted this to change, and Harry had the key to make it all stop.

I took a deep breath before I unlocked the door and went out into the hall and made my way to my room. Harry was sitting on the bed with the little paper plane between his fingers when I entered the room.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

I smiled shyly at him before I looked around the room for my shoes.

“Are you okay Esther?”

“Huh? Yeah I’m fine. Why?”

“You’ve drawn me… again.”

“Yeah…”

“Why?”

“Read it…”

“I have…”

“You don’t understand it?”

“No not quite…”

“I didn’t have any happiness left in my life until I met you 4 months ago. Since then I’ve grown stronger. I’ve gained weight, I’ve been sleeping at night and my life has been slowed down, and now it’s about to take a turn and go in the right direction.”

“Have you harmed yourself since you met me?”

I looked down in the ground afraid to answer and took my hand to my stomach. He soon stood in front of me. Removing my clothes to see the cuts that were printed into my flesh and revealed the pain I had been feeling and the shame I had had for eating.

The tears streamed down my face as he placed his hands over them and I tried to cover myself up. He let go of me and as I tried to flee he wrapped his arms around me. The anger and the fear were growing inside of me, but he had locked me to his body, so the only thing I could do was let go of it through my tears.

“Why Esther?”

“You don’t understand!”

The words weren’t understandable through my tears, but somehow Harry always understood.

“Make me.”

“You can’t Harry.”

I got loose of his grip and covered up the cuts on my stomach before I wiped away my tears with the sleeve of my shirt, before I went to the mirror to make myself ready for the coffee we were going out for. 

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