dear dirary love zayn

zayn is single he has a few problems along the way but will he get the girl of his dreams or will he find the one under his nose?

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1. may 17 2013

dear diary

 

hey....its me again. the names zayn if you haven't already forgotten. its been a while yeah. but ever since i finished high school all my friends have faded. they've left. they all became druggies or drunks. well anyway i know this is weird that i'm a grown boy and i shouldn't be writing in you but today i met a girl. a beautiful girl. her name is Erin  and i invited her over Friday. how did i meet her? i work this china restraint and she comes in every other day to get lunch. i guess we'v sorta become friends. shes very sweet and iv grown to really like her. i hope the other boys do to. oh i'm in a band now. its called one direction theirs 5 of us niall my best mate harry the stud liam the dad Louis that's lou-ee not lou-wis hes the jokiest and me zayn i'm sorta the bad boy i guess. they never like to have any fun. i like to party. harry does to but if it gets to hardcore he leaves. our band isn't very popular yet but i think it will be soon. we have a couple of gigs coming up nothing special though. OK back to this girl. shes gonna meet the boys Friday  there coming over to ill introduce her as a friend but i hope shell want more because i know i do. we'll play truth or dare. that'll get her feelings out. i just hope harry doesn't steal her. he tends to do that from time to time. i really miss this one girl from high school though. i remember walking into that classroom and asking the teacher the most random questions everyday just to see her. i was lucky if she even glanced at me. her name was maeson. she was so pretty! she had blue eyes and straight blond hair. but she died. no really shes dead the whole school was invited to her funeral. how did she die? murder. her ex boyfriend killed her when he got drunk one night. i don't know the details because only her sister knows them. she was there but wont tell anyone what happened. her name is marleigh. there twins. the reason my crush never went to her was because she went to a different school. she lived with her dad and maeson lived with her her mom. they were divorced. i have no idea why though. it doesn't really matter though. parents get divorced all the time and nobody ever knows why. i'm sure  nobody ever cares why. it seems like all people ever care about is money. i can get that way sometimes. and i hate myself for that. once when i was about 15 i would cut myself cause i got so mad that i was like that. once i started doing that everyone stopped talking to me i was only that 'emo kid' who nobody liked. everyone was afraid of me. they acted as if i wasn't in the room. until one day maeson passed me a book. the book was why people shouldn't self harm. she didn't talk to me. didn't say a word. she walked by and slipped it in my hands. that was the day that i knew someone cared. someone wanted to help. it made me think of her as more then just 'the popular girl' it made me realize she noticed everyone individually and cared about some. maybe it was cause she felt bad for me or maybe it was a mistake. or maybe she was dared to do it or maybe she actually cared. i don't know but what i do know is that i hope someday i meet someone as special as her.

 

                                                                                                                 xoxo - Zayn malik

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