Fix A Heart

Arden isn't your average 16yr old. She has a horrible reputation. No one understands her. No one knows the real story, and she's here to tell it. How everything really is and not what other people think. This story is different than a lot of movellas out there. So, I invite you to read and listen to Arden and how her world is flipped upside down and with every turn, there's a new, not so great, path. This story reminds you never to judge a book by it's cover and how actions speak louder than words. WARNING: This movella is rated red so it says 16+

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2. Backstory

        I wasn't always a bad kid. I can remember being six or seven and playing in the yard with my mom. I used to cheer so she would help me practice my routines. I was what all the other moms called "the perfect child". "Perfect" blond hair, "perfect" blue eyes, "perfect" attitude, "perfect" anything really. That as until I turned eleven. Mom died suddenly and unexpectedly. She was only 36. The doctors didn't even know what happened. She had no injuries or medical complications. That's when my dad lost it. He would get so frustrated with her death and couldn't wrap his head around it. That's also when he started hitting me. The abuse would occur every other week but it never really hit me it was because of mom's passing. I would think it was because I didn't clean or do other chores. That went on for a year.

    By the time I was twelve, the beatings started occuring every other day. By then I understood my dad's anger. It was the only way he knew how to cope. Now, I'm sixteen and I get abused everyday sometimes more than once. I've gone to school in horrible conditions but no one every cares because I usually get in fights at school weekly. In every school you have the "mean girls", well my school is slightly different. Girls never pick on me or mess with me. Guys on the other hand, like to bully me a little too much. They hit, kick, punch, once even threw me. Why? Well everything sort of goes in order. I get beaten at home, then also abused at school because they like to say I sleep around with their friends. Then when I get home with extra cuts, bruises, etc I get beaten even more for "being a bad child". You can imagine how stressed out I am. With stress constantly building up inside me, this is where all the drinking, stealing, cutting, partying, and drug experimenting comes in.

    When I was about fourteen is when I started sneaking out of the house. I never knew where I was going, but I stumbled upon a drug dealer who sells cheap. Reed. He told me the drugs would act as an "escape". He stil sells to me to this day. He's also the one who supplies me with alcohol. As for cutting, I only do that every once and awhile-usually when I dont have the money for drugs and alcohol which is rare since I can easily steal and re-sell. Partying happens every now and then when Reed takes me. I really only go because he'll buy me as much alcohol as I want.

   The first time I was raped, I was twelve. My dad had a friend over and locked me in a room with him. I can never take that back and I was only a kid. Since then I've been raped seven more times. Three times by different guys at school, a second time by my dad's same friend, and three times by different guys while walking home from visiting Reed for drugs. Most if not all my teachers consider me a "hopeless case". I have absolutely no other family to turn to, not even any cousins. No friends either. I'm on my own and I'm used to it. It's been this way since sixth grade. So you're probably wondering "Arden, why go on living if your life is so horrible?". Well, I've tried killing myself ten times so far. At first I never really knew what to try. First couple of times were by holding my breath. Stupid I know. All that got me was passing out for a little while. Other times I'd try to drown, but in a public pool with a lifeguard. I'd try to be smart about it though and wait for their lunch break, I'd hold my breath standing up so when I'd pass out I'd just "accidentally" fall in. You could say I was somewhat crafty with those drowning attempts. I think I've finally found something that will work though.

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