Where Are You Now?

**Read Love Me Like You Do 15+ before reading.**
When Hannah and Hayley get separated, can they keep their friendship strong? Does Hayley break? Does Hannah break? How could anything go right after they lose contact with the boys, other than Hayley and them.. Hannah has nothing to do with any of the boys... When Hannah has to bring her friends daughter to a One Direction signing, what happens?

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11. Why?

Hayley's POV
I can't believe she just said that. She knew exactly how I felt about that. She is the only person that know about it and now Justin and Liam do too. GREAT!! Once I went to the car I just sat there crying. Liam came in and sat there.

"Why wouldn't you tell me that!? We are engaged we have been together for a while now and you don't think to tell me that you used to be anorexic and suicidal!?"-Liam.

"I.. I.. I didn't think it was important anymore.. I stopped.. a while ago. Before I met you. I didn't think much of it. I was happy none of the thoughts of it all didn't come to me. I didn't think I had to tell you."-Me.

"YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO TELL ME!? I TOLD YOU EVERYTHING IN MY PAST!! AND YOU DON'T THINK ABOUT SAYING IT ALL TO ME ABOUT YOURS!?"-Liam. He never screams.

"I'M SORRY LIAM!! I'M FUCKING SORRY!! I USED TO FUCKING CUT MYSELF AND BECAME ANOREXIC BECAUSE OF JOSH AND ALL THE SHIT HE TOLD ME! HANNAH COULDN'T HELP ME BECAUSE I WANTED JOSH TO THINK OF ME AS PERFECT BUT I NEVER WAS!!"-Me. I was bawling.

"Hayley. I just don't know why you wouldn't tell me."-Liam. We got to the hotel room and I just ran to the bed. I sat there then got a text.

From Harry:) :

Hey. How are you? I have barley talked to you.

To Harry:)

Hey. I'm okay.. and we need to change that.

From Harry:) :

Okay? What's wrong?

To Harry:) :

Can we go to the park or something. I don't want to be around Liam right now and I want to go to Hannah's and get Bentley but I can't go alone.

From Harry:) :

What happened with you and Liam? And yeah I'll go and get him.

To Harry:) :

Thanks. I'll tell you meet me at the park in 10 with Bentley?

From Harry:) :

Yeah sure.

I changed my clothes to sweats and a sweatshirt. I grabbed my keys and was walking towards the door.

"Hayley. Where are you going?"-Liam.

"To the park with Harry and Bentley. Why do you care? Think I'm going to act suicidal?"-Me.

"No. Hayley. I just want to understand why you wouldn't tell me. After the park can you please talk to me about it?"-Liam. I nodded my head yes and walked out. I got in the car and drove to the park. I had tear after tear spill out of my eyes. I couldn't hold them back. I just probably lost my best friend and my fiance. I'm such a screw up. I got to the park and saw Harry and Bentley sitting on a bench. I quickly wiped my tears so Bentley wouldn't see. I walked over to them and hugged Bentley. I gave him a kiss on the forehead. He went and started playing. I gave Harry a hug.

"So, Hayley. What happened with you and Liam? And you and Hannah? Because when I got Bentley Hannah was crying."-Harry. Ever since the boys left for tour I got a really strong friendship with Harry. We are like brother and sister. I love him to death.

"Okay, well Hannah and I got into a fight because she said I spend too much time with Liam and not her. So I went with Liam today to get Bentley and we started talking. We started saying stuff she said I spend too much time with Liam and I said she spends too much time with Justin. The boys came back from talking and Hannah spilled one of my major secrets that she only knew about. I didn't tell Liam, I told no one but Hannah because she was there when it happened. I left Hannah's and Liam followed me. We started talking and we started yelling. I went right into the bedroom when we got to the hotel and then you texted me."-Me.

"What's the secret?"-Harry. Here we go.

"When I was with Josh, he told me that I wasn't perfect. I was fat and ugly and things like that.. So I got it in my head that I wasn't. I stopped eating and became anorexic. Then I started cutting myself because it all got worse and worse. The comments from him the comments from everyone. That's why I was so mad when Hannah came out about it all. Because she didn't tell me when I was going through the same shit."-Me. By the end I was crying.

"Hayley... Why did you do it?"-Harry.

"Because I felt worthless. I thought if Josh thought I wasn't perfect then who would? I get it if your mad at me too."-Me.

"Hayley, I'm not mad at you. I'm just surprised you seem so strong about everything. I wouldn't have thought you would do that."-Harry. I just sat there quietly crying. Harry hugged me. Then I felt someone touch my leg. I looked down and saw Bentley.

"Mommy, why are you sad? I thought you were happy now!"-Bentley.

"I am baby. I'm beyond happy. I just had a bad day."-Me.

"Why are you crying? Crying isn't good mommy."-Bentley.

"Something happened a long time ago before you were here, and it was just told to people."-Me. I knew he wouldn't understand.

"Oh. Okay. I love you."-Bentley. Harry looked at him and just smiled.

"I love you too baby."-Me. I picked Bentley up and gave him a hug.

"Uncle Hawwy, Mommy? Can we play a game?"-Bentley.

"Sure bud. What game?"-Harry.

"Hmm... duck.. no tag!"-Bentley. We got up and started playing tag. Bentley was 'it' he started chasing me and Harry around. He tagged me then I tagged Harry. We just played for hours. Until Bentley started yawning. I said bye to Harry and brought Bentley home. We got back and Bentley was asleep. I put him in my bed and went to see Liam.

"Liam. Look. I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I just couldn't I thought that if I did you would leave me because I was so weak. I didn't want to feel worthless again."-Me.

"Why would you think I would ever leave you for that? We all have our low points. And that was yours."-Liam.

"I don't know. I haven't been ready to tell anyone only Hannah knew. Now you Hannah Justin and Harry know. All from one day. Now I have to tell the other boys as well."-Me.

"You don't have to. It's up to you when you are ready. I just wanted you to tell me because we are engaged to be married. And you kept this huge secret from me."-Liam.

"I know. I shouldn't have. But I thought it was for the best."-Me.

"Why would you think that? I have been here through everything for you. You lied to me for how long? How do I know you aren't lying about anything else?"-Liam.

"How does it come up in a conversation. Hey babe how was your day and by the way before I met you I was anorexic and tried to kill myself. How's tour going?"-Me.

"That would have been nice. At least I would have known and not found out about it by Hannah."-Liam.

"I'M SORRY! Leave me if you want. But just to let you know. I would never lie about anything. I just didn't tell you. Okay? I didn't want to have this conversation. I didn't want ANYONE to know. I was surprised Taylor didn't say it. She finds out everything obviously. So just leave me already if I'm that bad of a fiance."-Me.

"Do you want me too?"-Liam.

"YES LIAM! Obviously I do! OF COURSE I DON'T!! Why would you even think that?"-Me.

"You said it. I don't want to leave you Hayley I want to help you."-Liam.

"I don't need help! I am over it all!"-Me. I started crying.

"Hayley. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell. I'm just confused and hurt that you wouldn't tell me."-Liam.

"I'm sorry too. That I didn't tell you."-Me. I bowed my head down in shame. He lifted my head up and looked me in the eye.

"I love you. Just tell me next time okay? You can tell me anything I won't judge you. I am madly in love with you. I want to be your husband I want you to have my last name."-Liam. He leaned in and our lips met.

"I love you too. And trust me I will. But I don't expect Hannah and I to make up anytime soon. She just let it all out. I didn't think she would stoop that low."-Me.

"Maybe it was good she said it. Would you have told me if she didn't?"-Liam.

"When I was ready too. But I guess it's better it came out now then later."-Me. Liam looked at me and just stared. I kissed him and he kissed me back. We kissed for awhile until we heard Bentley scream. 


 

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