Cocktails and Cigarettes

When Bethany has relationship problems, she finds comfort in going to clubs and drinking. So what happened when she begins to shadow Lou Teasdale? Will her and Harry hit it off, or will she push him away because the cocktails and cigarettes bring her more comfort? *Includes self harm references/actions, cursing, sex, smoking, and alcohol*


10. Ch. 10


A few minutes later, we pulled up at his house. It was probably the biggest place I’ve seen ever. It was like…a castle.

“Are you coming?” Harry asked. I jumped and turned to look at him. He had his door open and had a half smirk on his face.

“Yeah…” I said slowly. I pushed my door open and hopping out of the car. My heels clicked on the cobblestone driveway.

“Here Joe.” Harry said. I looked over to him and saw a man catch Harry’s keys. I walked over to him and he grabbed my hand.

“Is anyone else here?” I asked slowly.

“Yeah…the rest of the boys.” I nodded slowly as Harry pushed the door open.



“Did you kill someone on the way home?” The blonde one asked as he walked in. He paused when he saw me.

“No, I didn’t. Niall, this is Bethany.” I waved silently and Niall gave me a big smile.

“That’s the girl you go and see every weekend, isn’t it?” Niall questioned.

“Yeah.” Harry said as he pulled me further into the house.

“Oh, look whose back. I figured you…who’s she?”

“Lou, this is Bethany.”

“You mean the girl you go out every Friday to see; the one who doesn’t know who you are?” I looked up at Harry and he rolled his eyes.

“Bethany, this is Louis, Liam, Zayn, and you met Niall about two seconds ago.” Harry pointed out.

“Hi.” I squeaked out.

“Does she talk?” Louis asked.

“More than you know.”

“No one asked you.” I said, pushing Harry towards the wall. Him sill being slightly tipsy, fell into the wall.

“Jeez…pushy, aren’t you?” Zayn asked.

“No one asked you either.” I said, pointing at him.

“Sassy, aren’t we?” Liam pointed out.

“Yes. Now, I want to change.” I turned and looked at Harry who was smiling.

“Come on, love.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me behind him back to the stairs. When we got to his room, I sat down on his bed as he went to find clothes for me. I was looking around his room while he was grabbing my clothes. T was fairly plain but there were a few clothing articles on the floor and pictures around the room. I picked up one on his nightstand. He was between two very beautiful girls.

“Who are they?” I asked, still staring at the picture.

“My mom and sister; Gemma.” Harry said as he sat down next to me.

“They’re…they are beautiful.” I said slowly. I looked over at Harry and he was smiling.

“I think they are too.” I placed the picture back down and Harry handed me a t-shirt and some sweatpants.

“I’ll be downstairs in the living room, okay?” I nodded as Harry got up and walked out, closing the door behind him. I quickly changed out of my dress and heels and pulled on Harry’s clothes. They were too big on me but that made them all the more comfortable. I slowly made my way downstairs and when I did, I stopped at the door.

“She seems pretty cool.”

“How did you meet her again?”

I couldn’t tell their voices apart but I wasn’t going to go walking in as they were talking about me; I wanted to know what they had to say about me.

“We met at the club…well…sort of. She would be there and I would see how she reacted to things and she looked upset so I finally went to talk to her and…we sort of met up there ever since.”

“That’s interesting…”

“What do you know about her?”

“Pretty much everything…she was always drunk enough to start pouring all her problems out to me.”

“So, you know her whole life and she knows nothing about you?”

“She didn’t even know who I was…” Harry said slowly.

“Is that why you like her? Do you like her because she treated you normally?”

“Not only that…she seems …I don’t know…it’s hard to describe.”

“You like her.”

“Backkk…” I said as I walked in. They all turned to look at me and I stopped where I was. “What? Did I do something wrong?”

“No…no you didn’t.” Harry said, jumping off the couch. “You..uhm…look very nice.”

“I’m in your clothes.” I said, looking down at myself.

“You make them look good.” I looked back up and Harry was biting his lip.


“Are you hungry?” Liam asked me.

“Yeah, a little bit.”

“We can heat you up some dinner.” Liam said, getting up.

“Sure…thanks.” I followed Liam off to the kitchen. He pulled out a plate and put it in the microwave so it would warm up. While we waited, we both stood there in silence. I was picking at my fingernails and he was leaning against the counter, looking at the ground.

“What do you think of Harry?” Liam asked. I looked up and shrugged.

“I don’t know anything about him.” I pointed out.

“Yet you trust him.” I shrugged.

“He hasn’t given me a reason not to trust him…even if I didn’t know who he was. I didn’t tell him either so…I can’t really be mad at him for it. I probably should’ve known anyway it just didn’t click.”

“You really had no idea who he was?” I shook my head slowly.

“Nope.” The microwave beeped and Liam took my food out. He handed it to me, got me silverware, and we walked back out to the living room. I sat back down to Harry and started to eat. Everyone was quiet, making it a little weird for me.

“So, what doesn’t Harry know about you, Bethany?” I jumped when I heard my name. I looked up and saw them all looking at me.

“I…I don’t know. What have I told you?” I asked, looking at Harry.

“You’ve told me all about your problems and I know your name. That’s about it.” Harry said. I nodded and bit down on my lip as I looked back down at my food.

“Okay…well…I’m sixteen, I’m from America, and I’m here because I go to school at CSM.” I said slowly as I started eating again.

“Isn’t that a huge fashion school?” Zayn asked me. I nodded slowly.

“Damn…not bad.” Niall said. He reached over Harry, grabbed a piece of chicken off my plate, and started eating it.

“What the actual fuck do you think you’re doing?!” I snapped. Niall looked at me mid-chew.


“Put my food back.” I demanded. Niall slowly put it back on my plate and I shot him a glare. “Mine.”

“Jesus…someone’s protective over their food.” Louis pointed out.

“It’s mine.” I said again. I heard Harry laugh lightly, making me look up at him. His dimples were showing, making me blush. I quickly looked back down and finished eating. I got up and walked into the kitchen and slowly started washing my dishes.

“You know, you didn’t have to do that. We could’ve done that for you.” I turned around and Harry was standing in the doorway.

“Yeah, I would feel bad if I just left it here.” I said, quickly turning back to the dishes I was washing. I tried to concentrate on the dishes but knowing Harry had walked over and was looking at me was making it hard to concentrate. “Please stop…” I mumbled.

“What? I’m just standing here.” Harry pointed out. I squeezed my eyes shut and reopened them so I could look at him.

“You’re being a distraction.” Harry’s eyes sparkled and he started smiling even more.

“I’m not even doing anything to you though.” Harry pointed out.

“You’re looking at me though. That and you’re smiling.”

“I didn’t know that was a distraction.”

“It really is though.” I whimpered. I felt Harry gently touch my side, making me inhale sharply.

“Jesus…you weren’t kidding.” Harry whispered into my ear. I squeezed my eyes shut, inhaled slowly, and tensed up. I felt him behind me, slowly running his hands up and down my sides.

Push him away Bethany. You don’t know anything about him. But you trust him…so why would you push him away? You obviously like him…

“No I don’t!” I said loud enough for Harry to hear. I quickly slapped a hand over my mouth and Harry stepped back.

“You don’t what…” Harry asked.

“Nothing.” I said quickly, turning around to face him. He had a look of confusion on his face. “I’m ready to go home.”

“Already…?” Harry asked sadly. I slowly nodded, trying not to look into his eyes. “Okay, I’ll go get your stuff.” I sighed as I feel against the counter. I watched Harry as he walked out which probably wasn’t the smartest thing I could’ve done, since it made me want to touch him all over.

I composed myself so I could walk out to the living room to tell all the boys it was nice to meet them and to say goodbye. After I did, I waited for Harry by the stairs. He emerged, yelled to the boys that he would be back, and we walked out to his car together.

“They were all nice.” I said as he pulled out onto the road.

“Yeah, I figured you would like them.” Harry said quietly. I looked over at him and he was concentrating very hard on the road.

“I did.” I said slowly. We were both silent for a little while as we watched the buildings fly by. There weren’t a lot of people on the roads since it was late at night. Most people were either home or clubbing. We pulled into the parking lot of my apartment complex and I bit my lip as I looked over at Harry.

“It was nice to actually talk for a bit while you were…mostly sober.” Harry said quietly. 

“Why don’t you come in…?” I said slowly. Harry raised an eyebrow at me. “For like tea or something.” I quickly added in.

“Sure.” Harry said. We both hopped out of the car and slowly made our way to the building. We took the elevator up to my room and I slowly fumbled with the key to unlock the door. “Do you need some help there?” Harry joked. I laughed nervously as I finally got the door open. I pushed it open and threw the keys on the side table. I flipped on the light switch and walked into the kitchen.

“What kind of tea do you want?” I asked as I started boiling water.

“Oh, just…lemon is alright.” Harry said as he continued to look around. I nodded and took out two mugs, and two tea packets.

“Sugar, milk?” I asked.

“Both please.” Harry said as he sat down at the table. I placed the milk and sugar on the table while we waited for the water to boil. I sat across from him while we waited.

“Thank you.” I blurted out. Harry raised an eyebrow at me.

“For what…?” Harry asked, clearly confused.

“It’s…hard to explain.” I said slowly, looking down.

“Well, it’s not like I don’t know anything else about you. You can tell me.” I laughed nervously.

“Just…thanks for being there for me when I needed someone.” I said quietly.

“I should be thanking you too.” Harry pointed out.


“You know what you want in life. You know where you’re going, or you at least have a clue. I have to give you props for that. It’s an inspiration seeing someone going after their dreams like you do.”

“I’m pretty sure you’re living your dream.”

“Yeah, I am but it’s different when you see someone else living their dream too. It’s almost like you appreciate what you have even more. It makes you love it all the more.”

“I’m not sure I understand…”

“It’s complicated.” Harry said slowly as the teapot started to whistle. I got up and poured water into our mugs. I put in the tea packets, spoons, and placed the mugs on the table. “Thanks.” I nodded as I sat back down.

“No problem. I could do anything for someone who saved my life.” I said without thinking. For the second time that day, I slapped a hand over my mouth. Harry paused and looked up at me.

“What…?” Harry whispered.

“You…you saved my life.” I said. It was pointless avoiding the inevitable.

“I don’t want to push but…if you care to explain, would you?” Harry asked as he turned back to his tea.

“Yeah…sure…I might as well since I already said it.” I paused and took a deep breath. “Okay, basically I’ve just…I don’t really know. I’ve been slipping into a depression and I guess I would keep drinking more and more, trying to block it all out. I would come home and since all the bad memories would be imprinted on my brain, I would…” I paused, taking a deep breath again. I closed my eyes, feeling tears prick my eyes.

“I…I don’t think I remember this story…” Harry said slowly. I slipped my arms between my legs, pressing my wrists together.

“I would cut…every time they got deeper and deeper. I knew if it kept going I would end up bleeding out and killing myself. It only started slowing down when we started meeting weekly…” I whispered. I opened my eyes and Harry was staring at me, wide-eyed. He finally looked down and took a small sip of his tea. “Say something…” I begged of him; the silence killing me.

“May I?” He finally asked. He reached out for my arms. I nodded and he turned them over so he could see my wrists. “There isn’t anything there.” He looked up at me and dropped my arms.

“I haven’t cut for about a month…all that’s left are scars.” I said slowly. Harry nodded slowly. I stood up and walked over to the sink. I turned the water on and put my arms under the water, pushing the makeup off my arms. I turned off the water after most of the makeup was off and walked back over to the table. I sat back down and showed him my wrists again. Harry looked over at them and I saw hurt flash through his eyes.

“Those are pretty dark scars…”

“I cover them with makeup.” I whispered, looking down. I took my arms back and started drinking my tea.

“I’m happy you stopped.” Harry said slowly. I was about to say something, but Harry started talking again. “And I’m happy I’m the reason.” I looked up at him and he was intently staring at me. He leaned over the table and started kissing me gently.

“OUCH!” I screamed, making Harry jump back, realizing he had spilt his tea all over me.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” Harry jumped up, grabbed a rag, and started wiping up all the spilt tea while I went to change.

I changed into black yoga pants and an extra large black and white striped sweater. I walked back out into the kitchen and saw Harry re-making himself some tea.

“Oh, I can get it.” I said as I rushed over to his side.

“Not its fine, I go…” Harry trailed off and I looked up at him and he was staring down at me.

“What…is something wrong?” I asked, looking down at myself.

“No…you just…you look…wow…” Harry stammered. I looked back at him and his naturally bright green eyes were black as they re-scanned my body. I reached up and placed a hand behind his neck, playing with the tips of his curls. His eyes shot back up to meet mine.

“Kiss me…” I whispered. Without waiting another minute, Harry’s lips were pressed to mine.

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