Southern Constellations

Romany Fitzgerald wishes one day to lead a frivolous and harmonic life pursuing her dreams, but first, she must complete the exhausting challenge of being an actual teenager. Romany believes her vicinity is filled with people who just do not understand, in fact, nobody understands. Most of all, there's a person she would give her left arm to avoid.

Austin Orion.

Hell-bent on bringing beautiful chaos into Romany's life, can Austin and Romany build a steady friendship on the ruins of a lifetime of hatred? This seems far too surreal for Romany, but she is unknowing of the hell and torment waiting for her around the corner; she was yet to lose possibly the most important thing she had in the world; music.
But she still has the constellations for guidance; looking for answers in a world that doesn't know the question, can Romany delve deeper into what is meant to be and follow her heart?

Did fate fall short this time?

A/N: Rated red for bad language and trauma.

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11. Eleven

 

I hadn't a clue what to do, and even after he seemed to be cool with the situation I was still a huge, incoherent mess. How could this be? How did I miss this? How was I so ignorant to this information? Lillian came back from the kitchen with tea, even though we'd both politely refused several times.

"I was telling Romany about how you play guitar, you could help her with her skills," she smiled between the two of us. We'd still not said a word to one another, just endlessly staring in disbelief that it could be us two of all people that fate just happened to force together of all the people in universe.

"Um, I'm not sure Romany would be up for that." Austin says coldly.

"Oh, she really would, she has so must potential Austin, it would make me so happy." Austin looked at me curiously, and I still had no words to say.

"You're very quiet dear," Lillian says to me, placing a hand over mine.

"I'm fine," I say, "just a bit overwhelmed, that's all."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring such a burden over your head, darling, if I could have it any other way…"

"Oh, gosh, no, Lillian, it's not your fault, I'm sorry, I'm just, I don't—It just shouldn't be you, okay?" Another tear slips down my cheek, and I even noticed Austin tear up a bit, which I think is the first time I'd ever seen him express an emotion that wasn't bitterness or spite. "Anyone but you, Lillian, this shouldn't be happening to such a beautiful and caring woman, it's so cruel."

"Life is cruel, darling." She tells me, but it's not comforting in the slightest. Austin was still looking at me, and he was quintessentially being very unlike the Austin Orion I'd grown to know over the last couple of years. I stared at him for a while too, just accepting the fact that now, after everything, we were hopelessly in this thing together, and we had no other choice because life is cruel.

"I can tell you two want to talk so I'll leave you two to it, alright. I'll be in the other room." I go to protest but in the end I see no point, she's just being polite, and besides, protesting to Lillian doesn't get you anywhere – I look at the pot of neglected tea we didn't want.

Austin and I sat in silence for a while; I had no idea what to say, and even if I did, I wasn't sure I'd say it anyway. So all I say is the only thing anyone says in a situation like that.

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault," is always the reply.

"Well I am. I'm sorry life is unfair."

"You're not the one who should be apologizing on behalf of life."

"Sorry."

"Stop saying sorry." 

"Okay."

 

A long exasperated sigh left Austin's lips, and then I was really out of things to say.

"How's Grayson?" He said through gritted teeth, out of the blue.

"I wouldn't know, I haven't spoken to him in weeks. Last thing I heard he blew his college money on a fancy car and drove east somewhere. Funny that, I thought we were actually getting somewhere." The time I spent with Grayson was great, but he seemed to be less and less interested in me as I became more and more interested with Lillian and learning guitar. It was my own fault really.  

"Oh… I'm sorry."

"Why? It was never going to come to anything anyway."

"I'm sorry because you're genuinely one of the nicest people in this entire goddamned neighborhood and all you get is shit from people for wanting to do well and you deserve to be happy."

I'd be lying if I said I had a clue where that came from.

"W—What?" I say, I was slightly taken aback to say the slightest. Where is the real Austin and what have you done with him? I thought.

"I've done some pretty shitty things to you in the past and it's not personal, I swear," I look at him sternly, "okay once, once it was personal, but I'm just an asshole who's a dick to people without thinking about it, but you're always so nice to people and you're pretty and lovely and you don't deserve any of my shit."

I paused for a second, completely taken aback, "Austin Orion, are you apologizing to me?"

"I—"

"And did you just call me pretty?" I smiled lightly. He blushed slightly, but failed miserably at hiding it.

"Uh—uh well yes, I did just apologize to you, and yes I did just call you, um, pretty."

I suddenly felt all warm inside.

 

Maybe every black cloud does have a silver lining after all.

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