I Solemnly Swear - Tales of Love and Loss

Dive into the land of love and desperation with 'I Solemnly Swear'. A collection of short stories both written and compiled together by Nella Grace, this book will have you laughing and crying in no time.
The stories in this book are based on songs, dreams and real life experiences.

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5. Need to Breathe

 

I wonder if you ever think about me. I know that you’re with her and that she makes you so incredibly happy; but it doesn’t stop me from wondering. Once upon a time we were almost like lovers, all the inside jokes and conversations about practically nothing; just talking because we enjoyed each other’s company.

I wonder if you ever dream of our hugs, how intimately wonderful they were. I always wondered if you enjoyed the as much as I did. Did you like the feel of my head on your chest? Did you ever enjoy the smell of my hair or perfume? Did you ever want to kiss my forehead?

I wonder if you saw through my obvious signs of affection. Did you honestly think I’d make a cake for just anyone? Did you see through it then? Do you see through it now?

I wonder if you ever regret not spending enough time together. Did you ever thinking of asking me to hang out? Did you ever consider asking me out on a date?

I wonder if you ever lie awake at night thinking of me, the way I still do to this very day. I wonder if you ever said my name with yours, the way it would be if we were a couple, just to see how it sounds.

I wonder how you felt whenever you saw me. Did you ever get butterflies? Did you ever feel your heart beat a million miles an hour? Did your palms sweat? Did I ever make you nervous?

I wonder if you ever fought back your desires. Did you ever long to stroke my cheek? Did you ever long to feel my lips brush against yours? Did you ever long to reach out and play with my hair?

I wonder if you ever imagined us together. Did you ever picture us sitting together on the couch, cuddled up with blankets watching a movie? Did you ever imagine lying underneath the stars, my head on your chest as we whisper to one another; revealing our deepest wishes? Did you ever picture us walking hand in hand down the street? Did you ever imagine you sneaking up behind me and hugging me from behind, all because we hadn’t seen each other in a bit and you missed me?

I have dreamed all these things and more so many times that I’ve lost count. I miss you more than words could say. We may not have been a couple, but with you I felt complete. Now that we’re so far apart and I have to learn to live without you, I feel a little lost. Almost like there’s a piece of me missing.

So as I wander around in circles, trying to make sense of this mess, I dream of you. I imagine you holding me in your arms, gently kissing my forehead and telling me that it’s all going to be alright. I need you like I need to breathe, and right now I’m dying without you.

 

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