Tranquility

This definitely should have a trigger warning on it. I'm not trying to promote any behaviour like I mention in this. I just thought I'd try my hand at poetry and this is proof of why I don't write poetry. Ever.

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2. Tranquility

 

A shaky breath exhaled after a wearisome day

Released only in the confinement of your room.

Tears begin to fall free, fast, and there’s nothing you can do

To stop the steady flow streaming from your eyes.

 

It’s times like these you’re thankful for the lock on the door

And thankful for the stash of tissues stocked under your bed

You withdraw one from the box now, in preparation

For the crime you’re about to commit.

 

Another reach under your bed reveals a box

And in that box a family of oddities hides from sight

Shards of plastic, pins, button badges, an earring,

And finally at the bottom, lies a nastier secret.

 

You begin with the plastic, but it’s not enough.

The pins and badges can’t sustain this feeling.

And the earring’s handiwork is basically child’s play

So you go for the final option instead.

 

Too many times you find yourself with a blunt pencil,

Or an eyeliner too sharp to use safely anymore.

Borrowing sharpeners from friends at school is the last resort

Because the blades of all yours are hidden in this box.

 

You bring one to your skin, marvelling at the beauty

Of the silver glinting, winking, at you in the dim bedroom light

And then there’s nothing more beautiful than seeing

Your own blood flowing as freely as your tears.

 

Of course, you stop soon enough, grabbing a tissue

And erasing the worst of the problem, only to find

Comfort and solace in the marks left on your skin.

It’s as though you’re ripping through a paper doll.

 

It’s odd, sick, twisted to find tranquillity in such bad habits,

But you don’t seem to want to stop the behaviour.

In fact, your conscience is telling you to continue it,

And like a fool, you decide that you should.

 

You happily accept the offer of a tempting blade,

You listen to the voices telling you this is right,

And it's only when you notice that your skin is scarred over

That this was a bad thing to do. 

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