The Life of Jordan Martinez (boyxboy)

Jordan is the most popular kid in school...not because he's mean or rude, but because he's sweet and he's never mean to anyone. He has one secret. That secret being he's gay. His brother Matt is on the football team and is the only one who knows. He and his brother's 2 best friends are Liam and Niall. They live the perfect high school lives. But now it's now the first day of their junior year. What happens when you add 2 trouble makers, Harry and Louis, into the mix. I mean, add a bad ass, sort of, named Zayn, and you get a whole bunch of drama!

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23. saying yes

Jordan's POV

i wake up in a hospital bed and look around. i feel a burning sensation in my left arm. then i remember, and start to cry again. it seems like my body is 95% tears these days. i just want the pain to go away. i didn't mean for the cuts to be this bad, but i just wanted the pain to go away. i guess cutting makes things more clear for me. i know exactly what it means to hurt, exactly what hatred feels like, now i wanted revenge on 1 person and this time i knew exactly what to do and i wasn't going to back down. i am going to let myself fall for 1 more person, and to my surprise that person was standing next to my hospital bed. to my right i see my brother in tears, and to my left i see the boy i have had a crush on since the 6th grade, Liam Payne. the feelings i have always had for him slowly disappeared when i was with Zayn but now that what happened, well happened, all of those feelings are coming back at once. and i kinda like it. surprisingly, Niall is the first one to see that i'm awake. his whimper turns into a huge smile. i'm actually really happy for Matt. He seems so happy with Niall.

"hey, you're awake!" Niall says in a half yell. i could see everyone in the rooms eyes like up. then Matt had an almost angry look on his face.

"how could you be so stupid and so selfish! do you know how worried i was. every second i was afraid that stupid fucking monitor was gunna flat line!... i love you so much! don't ever do ANYTHING like that again! okay?" Matt says. in that moment i realized how stupid an selfish i was being. and how it effected everyone around me. Matt gives me a huge hug, being careful not to touch the gashes in my arm.

"i love you too! more than i've ever loved anyone in my entire life! you are my twin, the only one i could tell anything to, the only one that was and is there for me no matter what. i was just too stupid to realize it." i say. i look over at Niall and give him a reassuring smile.

"i can't believe i almost lost you. Jordan you're my best friend. i never want you to ever do anything like this again! i,i just um" before Liam could finish the doctor came in and told me i have to stay over night for an evaluation and that i have to take pills for depression. i knew they would make me sleepy because i saw a movie and this girl took pills like that and they made her sleepy. whatever. as long as me and everyone around me is safe i'm okay. the doctor left and i sat up. i looked around. i finally broke the awkward silence.

"um, can i talk to Liam alone please?" i ask Niall and Matt. they got up and left. finally i'm alone with Liam. a couple days ago i would've hated this, but now i kinda like it.

"hey, can i talk to you about something?" he asks.

"yea sure, of course." i say. i wonder what it is. but i need to tell him how i feel before anything. "but i need to tell you something first." i say.

"yea what is it?"

"i um, Liam i really like you, like the way i liked Harry and Zayn, but A LOT stronger. i've liked you since the 6th grade and it took me til 9th grade to admit it to myself and it has taken this long to tell you. and i don't care if you never talk to me again i just wanted you to know that." i say. and honestly, i didn't care what he thought. i got it out, i told him and now i finally get to know how he feels about me.

"Jordan, remember when i kissed you?" i nod, "well i did it because i love you, i have fallen in love with you and nothing will ever change the past but i don't want to have another minute of the future without you in it."

"so what are you saying?" i question. i knew what he was gunna say, i just wanted to hear him say it.

"Jordan, will you go out with me?" he asks. i pause. i knew what i was gunna say but it was like i couldn't say it. i finally allowed myself to say it.

"yes." right after i said yes Matt came in with a letter from someone. it was from Zayn.

"Dear Jordan," .....

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