The Rain On Monday

Written words are the only thing my mind can find ease in.

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76. Thirty

The first time, I took 30 pills, but when I went to bed that night,

I hadn't anticipated that I would be waking up.

The second time, I tied a noose around my neck, and when it broke, I did too.

The third time, I pressed a razor to my vein and watched a red waterfall cascade down

my arm, but then they stitched my arm up and forgot to stitch my heart.

The fourth time I had this plan that couldn't fail.

I didn't write a note, and instead I left everyone wondering whether or

not it was an accident.

The car hadn't killed me so much as made me more whole than I was

when I had existed.

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