This Is Why I Hate Uni

My best friend is gone. He has left me to live without him.
“Excuse me miss, this was found. Its for you” I stood in the doorway of his room while they bagged his body downstairs. I could hear the cries of his mum, and sisters. The paramedic handed me the letter.
Ruby Taswatt
It read. I can’t read this. If I read it then that means he is really gone.

1 Year later
He’s annoying, a giant flirt and above all a little smart ass. However I need a place to stay and there is no way I can stay at home, there are to many memories, I’m surprised I made it through the second half of senior year without him. Still haven’t read the letter though. It could be worse, I could have a ditsy blonde bimbo slut as a roommate instead of this ladies man. Well I guess this is how I’ll live while at Universaty. Without my best friend, living with someone who brings home a different girl every second night. Great.


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9. I need to know

the italics at the start are and extract from James' letter

Ruby's POV 

*I want all of my secrets back. But I guess they aren't really secrets anymore since everybody will know. Everybody will about the scars, the depression, and the eating disorder. They’ll know everything. I hate getting close to people these days, I always regret sharing too much, caring too much, doing too much, feeling too much.*

James always said that I let people in to easily; I'm like an open book. So when he passed I closed up. I never told anyone anything and I always kept to myself. I think that's the reason I only really have Amy as a friend. I'm okay with that though because I love her like a sister. She's my best friend, and my first friend I made when I moved here from Bradford. But now I have Harry, and even Amy can see that he's what I need. 

"What happened this morning?" She asked as I finished my story about last night. I smiled sighing happily. Memories of this morning flooding back. 

"I woke up and he was still there asleep right next to me. Right in the same position as when I fell asleep. I dunno I sort of just lay there staring at his features and playing with his hair." I chuckled softly. I'm such a girl when I'm crushing and boy am I crushing hard. 

"He woke up and we spent a good thirty minutes just lying there until his stomach growled and we got up and made breakfast. He had class at 10 so that was really all that happened. I was watching cartoons when he left and before he walked out the door he kissed my cheek and said ‘have a good day’. Yea that was it I guess, nothing to special." I finished biting my lip. Amy tucked her legs up onto the couch smiling knowingly at me. 

"I haven't seen you this happy since I got you Fun. tickets earlier this year." She giggled. Yea that's probably true. But it won't last long, he doesn't like me back so why am I even hoping. 

"Did you ask him why he read the letter? Did you forgive him" she asked. Amy always asks the tough questions, damn her. I shook my head, no, and rested my head back against the couch. The door opened softly and in walked Harry. We both watched him as he took of his shoes, jacket and bag and turned to face us. I quickly turned back around, what an interesting bowl of popcorn... Amy on the other hand just gave him a goofy grin. 

"Hello there" she chirped. I saw out of the corner of my eye him smile and nod. 

"Hi" he spoke. Gosh his voice. Harry walked past down the hall and into his room while Amy practically bounced up and down in her seat while I sank down into the couch. 

"Wait," she whispered leaning towards me. 

"Are we trying to hate him still or like him" ummmmmmmm 

"Good question...ill be back." I stood a plan in mind. Walking down the hall Amy yelled behind me. 

"I'm eating all the popcorn!" Laughing I knocked on Harry's door. 

"Come in" he called. I opened the door. Jesus take the wheel does he only own one top or something. Thank The Lord if that's true...I mean seriously he's standing there his shirt off looking through his bag like nothing is out of the ordinary. I think I'm drooling. 

"You alright there?" He laughed. I smiled not so subtly checking out his toned oh dear lord save me torso. 

"Take me" I whispered without thinking. Shit. He raised an eyebrow in confusion and I awkwardly stood there not knowing what to say. Smooth ruby   Real smooth. 

"Okay but you might want to tell your friend to leave because you'll be screaming my name." Harry winked grabbing my waist. Amy...leave. 

"That's not why I'm here Harry" I spoke. Yes words there you are I've missed you. WHERE WERE YOU!!? He pouted slightly giving my hips a squeeze. 

"What is it babe?" He asked pecking my forehead. How do I put this? What about, 'what's going on between us because I really like and am finding it hard not to ounce on you right here and now?' No that's a bit to forward. 

"How was your day?" Ruby you are the most awkward person EVER seriously what is wrong with you?! Harry pulled away and went back to looking through his bag. 

"Pretty good, how was yours" he answered. I feel horrible. 

You should you just lost your chance dimwit. 

Yea well :p 

"'twas okay except I got homework which sucks" I said sitting at his desk. I swivelled round in the chair and ended up facing Harry as he pulled a notebook from his bag. 

"Me too" placing the book behind me on the desk we were very close together now. 

"You know you just left your friend, Amy isn't it, alone in the lounge?" LOL like I care I've got a great view here. 

Harry then doubled over in laughter falling onto his bed. Shit did I just say that out loud?

"Yes you did rubz" I glared at Harry, walking over as he lay on the mattress. Hmmmmm payback is in order for laughing at me. Straddling him now he looked up at me, I smirked back as he lifted himself up onto his elbows. 

"If it means anything," he whispered gazing over my body. Awesome day to wear a singlet top and skirt ruby. 

"I've got a pretty good view at the moment as well" he winked. Oh dear lord ruby don't launch and Amy don't walk in. 

"Thank you very much" I winked back. Where is this coming from? He cupped my cheek and pulled my face down towards him. I looked at his eyes, grass green with spots of gold and brown. I don't know what it is about Harry, when I'm with him I'm different. I'm not awkward or hidden, I don't need to hide parts of me. He makes the old me came out of hiding, I don't know if I want that, I've kept the old me hidden away for nearly two years, I don't think I can keep her hidden forever and Harry, Harry isn't helping with that. What if I stop trying to keep her away, what if the old ruby comes out to play? Then what do I do. 

 

Harry's POV

I pulled her face towards mine and looked for her approval to kiss her. I couldn't read her eyes, they were to busy searching mine. So i pushed my lips to hers anyway ruby instantly kissing me back. Our lips moved in sync while she placed her hands around my neck pulling me closer to her, I grabbed her waist moving my hips against hers. Licking her bottom lip I begged for entrance, she moaned against my lips the second our tongues touched. 

"Your friend is still here" I said pulling back only slightly. Ruby sighed and stood up going towards the door. I didn't mean for her to leave heck I wanted to carry on but her friend is here and I wouldn't want anyone walking in on us. Suddenly ruby was back in my room standing in the doorway. A smile on her face. I jumped up and walked over to her, grabbing her waist I pulled her closer to me. I started at her neck kissing and sucking every so often. 

"Harry" she whispered gripping my hair. I moaned against her neck just by her saying my name. 

"Harry stop" she said again. She was holding back a moan as I whispered next to her ear. 

"We both know you don't want me to" her hands were on my chest pushing my back slightly. 

"What is it?" I asked squeezing her hips reassuringly. She quickly pecked my lips. 

"I need to know something. Two things really but I don't know how." 

 

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