This Is Why I Hate Uni

My best friend is gone. He has left me to live without him.
“Excuse me miss, this was found. Its for you” I stood in the doorway of his room while they bagged his body downstairs. I could hear the cries of his mum, and sisters. The paramedic handed me the letter.
Ruby Taswatt
It read. I can’t read this. If I read it then that means he is really gone.

1 Year later
He’s annoying, a giant flirt and above all a little smart ass. However I need a place to stay and there is no way I can stay at home, there are to many memories, I’m surprised I made it through the second half of senior year without him. Still haven’t read the letter though. It could be worse, I could have a ditsy blonde bimbo slut as a roommate instead of this ladies man. Well I guess this is how I’ll live while at Universaty. Without my best friend, living with someone who brings home a different girl every second night. Great.


1. ...Him

I love when the outline of the tree’s branches make their way onto my wall as the sun shines through the open curtain. Its like my wall is a blank canvas and the sun is naturally painting a picture. Until I realise I’ve spent 5 hours sitting on my bed reading because my roommate is a fuckwit and decided he was allowed friends.

This is one of the reasons why I missed living at home, at least then I could tolerate my brother’s friends, and there was only one over at a time. But. No. My roommate Mr ‘I’m so hot I have a different girl over every night and I am a complete dick but who cares I’m hot and up myself’ has to have four of his friends PLUS two of their girlfriends over in our tiny two-bedroom apartment.

This is why I hate Uni.


“RUBZZZZZ” Ugh what do you want?!

“What?” I replied rather bitterly (not that I care), opening the door. There he stood looking as innocent as can be, my idiotic, mind traumatizing, video playing, partying, ladies man, flirt of a roommate Harry. Or Curly Fries as I like to call him because he hates it. I’m evil and dislike him stfu.

“I forgot how to uh not burn the erm popcorn. Can you make it?” He smiled. Dude, those dimples aren’t going to help you when it comes to me.

“No.” I said going to shut my door only to find his foot in the way. Geez!

“Please, you can meet my friends?” He whispered, a pleading look in his eyes. STOP IT! You’re not a puppy begging for foods so don’t give me that look.

“This one time and I don’t want to meet your friends.” I gave in. He wouldn’t go away if I didn’t OK its true, I hadn’t officially met his friends. However I most definitely heard them. No not like that you dirty minded freaks, get your head out of the gutter! Whenever they’re here I can hear them laughing and yelling, it is annoying as heck! I have learnt a bit though.

·      they love playing FIFA

·      one of them is Irish

·      One of them is always cracking jokes and pulling pranks (pretty sure his name is Louis because I always hear “LOUIS YOU BASTARD” or something along those lines)

·      One of them is well less immature than the rest and I’ve heard him tell the boys off a few times for jumping on the table. Sigh

·      One really likes food, think it’s the Irish one as well

·      one always checks his phone and sounds like he’s from Bradford (my home soil yo yo)

And that class is what I have learnt by hiding in my room for the past 2 months. A lot I know.


“HEY you must be Ruby Hazza boy’s beautiful roommate” A voice said behind me as I walked around the wooden island towards our microwave where the popcorn sat, still in the plastic wrapping, oh my gosh this boy is an idiot. I put the popcorn in for 2minutes and turned around to find Harry’s face literally inches away from mine. PERSONAL BUBBLE PLEASE!!

“Stop it at 15seconds and you’ll be sweet.” I said then tried to walk around him but failed miserably. He grabbed my waist and pulled me against him so our chests were pressed up against each other. I could feel his hot breath on my cheek and out of habit rested my hands on his muscular arms. HEY! This guy is fit I must admit like wow you, just how do you exist wow.

“I told them you were my girlfriend.” He paused. Ummmm WHAT?! Like wait W.H.A.T!!!!!!????? I scoffed, typical Harry lying to make him self look better.

“Please just fro tonight say you are, they really wanted to meet you and I’ll owe you if you do.” He continued whispering so only I would hear. One of the ones with girlfriends kept looking over at us every few seconds however the rest of them were glued to the TV or talking amongst themselves.

Should I or shouldn’t I?

He would owe you remember.

Yea but I would have to pretend to be its girlfriend.

But you could make him do any thing for you.

Touché brain, touché.

“Fine, but you owe me and I’m not kissing you on the lips.” I said as the microwave went beep. Great burnt popcorn the icing of the horrible cake that shall be my night.




Wow that was easier than I thought it would be. Hmmm maybe she doesn’t want to kill me and cut my balls off like she has said….

“Hey everyone as you probably guessed this is Rubs, my beautiful girlfriend.” I said dragging her away from the popcorn that she was oh so carefully pouring into a bowl over to the boys, Niall, Louis, Zany and Liam as well as Louis’ girlfriend Eleanor and Liam’s girl Danielle. They all introduced themselves and everything seemed to being going well, Ruby was talking to El about school while I sat next to Zayn watching whatever home renovation show was on.

“Can we please watch the movie now I’m getting bored of this shit.” Niall said throwing a handful of popcorn at the TV. I shrugged looking around, everyone nodded in agreement so I stood and walked over to get one of the movies Lou had brought round.

“Uh this is probably a good time to say bye, I don’t want to intrude on your guy’s movie night thingamajig or anything.” Ruby said walking towards her bedroom door. Wow she’s being polite for once in her life, that’s a surprise.

“Don’t be silly you can join us for the movie.” Stuff you Liam you horrible polite person. I’m fine if she leaves honestly go girl go hide like you always do.

“Well…” She looked up at me for confirmation. I simply shrugged, there is one seat left so one of us would have to sit on the floor.

Or she could sit on your lap since it’s a scary movie and you could hold her close like you secretly want to.

Shut up brain no one likes you.

Just do it you idiot.

“Wait, don’t sit there.” I ran over to the couch practically diving on it before she could sit.


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