Memory Burns

Trish's house catches on fire, causing both of her parents' deaths. Only she knows that she was the cause of that fire. She goes to live in an orphanage in the hopes of being adopted, but something weighs on her mind. Somebody who had threatened her had intentionally killed her parents, and now they want to kill her. She goes from foster home to foster home, trying to adjust to the life she now has and let go of the ones she lost.


14. Chapter 14- Lost in Pain


The alarm clock buzzes and I groan. Yet again, the pain wakes me up immediately and sends a course of adrenaline through my body. I jump out of bed but then I wince, forgetting how much pain bruises are capable of. I quickly get dress, and I am forced to put on long sleeves and pants.
"Are you ready for school?!" I hear Mr. Long's voice outside my door.
"Give me a second!" I shout back to him, and he walks away silently.
After breakfast, I barely catch the bus. When I walk up the aisle, I hear whispering and giggling. Kids stare at me as I walk past them. Some pityingly, some amused, and some curiously. I ignore them and sit down in the seat I sat next to Kate yesterday. She looks at me out of the corner of her eye but doesn't say anything.
"Why is everybody being so quiet?" I whisper.
She shrugs at me as color rushes into her face. She stares out the window and keeps her back towards me.
As I walk out of the bus, I see Alison walk towards me.
I smile and wave at her, but the smile isn't returned. She scowls at me and crosses her arms.
"It looks like you have some secrets..." she says this quietly, and looks me dead in the eye.
Did Izzy tell? She wouldn't have!
"I don't know what you're talking about," I mumble, staring at my feet.
"Don't bother lying, I have all the information from a little friend of yours," I gasp in shock and I feel the blood rush from my face. She betrayed me. After everybody I knew had betrayed me, I was stupid enough to easily put my trust into one girl... and she hurt me anyways.
"I don't need to listen to you..." I trail off and start walking away from Alison, but I feel a hand on my shoulder.
It's one of the boys that Alison was flirting with yesterday, "Do what she says," I stand still, not turning around and not moving forward, waiting for what comes next.
'I would like to hear you say it," Alison hisses, and I jump. She has moved closer, almost on top of me.
"Say what," I don't want her to say it. Maybe it's not true.
"You know what I'm talking about," she growls, and I take a deep breath, preparing to speak but something stops me. A small, tingling pain on my cheek.
I open my eyes and see her hand inches away from my face. It takes a few seconds for it to kick in... she just slapped me!
Instincts from the orphanage kick in, and I grip her throat and punch her in the nose. Of course, I'm not strong. Not in the least. She quickly regains composure and smiles at me.
"That's the most you got, coming from an orphanage?" she wrenches free of my grasp and I gasp. What have I done?
"Kids, what is going on here?" a teacher comes up from behind, and I freeze.
"Sh-she just attacked me out of nowhere!" Alison looks terrified, and she is holding her throat in the spot where I just cut off her air.
"Both of you, come with me to the office."

In the office, they quickly called my parents and dismissed Alison.
"What happened there?" the principle asks me gently. I like her. She is very understanding.
"I didn't want people to find out that I was adopted, but Alison started harassing me about it. SHe must have found out from someone..." I trail off and try to think of a scenario where Izzy didn't tell Alison.
"Was that any reason to attack her?" she says, her lips pressed together.
"She smacked me, I guess it just kind of happened..." I don't try to explain further, because I know it won't change the fact that I am going to be in big trouble. My fingers brush the new bruises from last night and I wince.
"Is everything okay at home?" she asks me.
I open my mouth to answer her honestly, but then hesitate. Will telling her about Mrs. Long really solve my problems? Or will it just give Mrs. Long another reason to hurt me? Does she actually want to help me or is she just curious? I decide to lie, just to be safe.
"Everything is great at home... the family is really hitting it off," the lie rolls easily off my tongue, and I begin to really hate myself. How can I lie so easily. How much my life has changed since I killed mom and dad. I can feel my eyes sting, a warning that I will cry so I quickly think about Alison. My face grows stony.
"Well, you can go on home. We aren't going to punish you for being a victim. Please tell me if something like this happens again.
I nod and get up, brushing off my skinny jeans although no dust has accumulated.
"Thankyou, Mrs. Josephs..." I shut the door behind me and close my eyes, exhaling.
Alison is sitting in the chair in the waiting room, and she eyes me suspiciously, "Loser, hope you had a nice time in there. I bet your mother would be proud... oh wait..." I shut the door before she finishes her sentence. Even though she is trying to hurt me and I shouldn't let the words effect me, they sting. I close my eyes and picture what I would be doing right now.
If I never made the mistake, I would probably be sitting in class right now, writing down my notes for class and complimenting the teacher's outfit. Girls would smile at me sympathetically, girls that used to be my friends, and knew that our friendship was split up by my mom. Others, though would be scowling at me, sticking their feet out to trip me as I walked down the aisle. But I know that I would be happy. I would have 2 parents, and be planning to get a puppy in the summer.
"Do you need something else?" the secretary has walked in the room and looks at me impatiently.
"Oh, no, I'm sorry," I mumble. I quickly walk outside and arrive to my first bell late. The teacher gives me a dirty look but ignores my late entrance. I see Alison smirk at me, and I turn my head away from her as my cheeks heat up.
I walk toward the bus, quickly, excited to talk to Kate more. Unfortunatley, that doesn't happen.
"Where you going?" I low voice growls in my ear. I shut my eyes tight, and I pushed back into an alleyway. A dozen students, mostly Alison's friends are standing there, pale, apprehensive.
"I'm sorry, guys, I have to catch the bus." I say quickly, scurrying out of the large girl's grip. I take off running towards the parking lot, but stare in dismay as the bus pulls away, leaving me stranded in the sidewalk with a throng of girls catching up to me.
"Guys, go away, you're going to get us caught again!" Alison yells at them, and they scurry back into the dark corner.
Alison pushes me back in too, and the girls look the same. Pale, nervous, and apprehensive.
"We need to know if it's true. The rumors about you. If they aren't true, then I sincerely apoligise for the trouble I've caused you. And I'm sorry that you got in trouble today true if that's the case..." her voice trails off.
I feel anger coursing through my veins, and I can't help but retort, "You got in trouble, didn't you! You just can't admit that this time, I was the victim and you were finally caught in the act! Even if I was adopted, would that give you the right to treat me this way? You're a coward," I end my long outburst in a whisper, and I can feel the back of my eyes stinging, but I don't allow the tears to spring.
"Oh, so they found out that I started it... that doesn't mean that I'm not right! Somebody who bothers other people, begging them to adopt, has no right to exist. They are a waste of space and air!" she walks forward and squeezes her fingers around my wrists.
"I... I feel bad for you. You must have had some pretty sucky stuff happen in your life to be so hateful..." my voice breaks and I stop talking, not wanting to give away that I'm hurt.
"I feel bad for me, too, knowing that I have to deal with vermin like you!" she spits. She grabs my hair and slams my head to the ground. I feel blood erupt in my mouth and the world spins around me. I still fight back tears, though, unwilling to give up just yet.
I don't cry out, I stay silent, biting my lip, even though the pain is almost unbearable. She slams my head down again and icy needles stab my wrist, which slammed to the ground. It's either cracked or broken, but still I stay soundless.
How can somebody be so cruel?
Someone kicks my stomach and soon everybody joins in, yelling at me, mocking me, calling me crude names, punching me, kicking me, tormenting me. The world is in black and white and I stare around wildly.
Where am I?
I am so hurt, there are tears streaming down my face, yet I feel nothing. No pain, just terror. Something holds me to the ground, but I struggle to get up. Finally noise pierces through the murky nothingness.
"Is she still alive?!" a tiny voice penetrates through the utter nothingness and I desperatley try to pull my heavy head up, but it feels like lead.
"Stop it!" A scream comes from around the corner. The noise hurts my head even more, and I sob. My mouth is dry, but my face is soaking wet. With blood, or tears, I'm not sure.
At the orphanage, it wouldn't be like this. Yes, kids got beat up all the time, but nobody would ever gang up on somebody and unfairly beat them, even after they were down. Because we had all been through that same pain. But it's not like that here.
It's not like that.

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