Mattie

©Molly Looby No way. I knew I was dying. I knew I was dying fast, but this hit me like a speeding bullet. How long did I have left, years, months, weeks? Days...?
Hours...?


For Ali-Rose life is just a fading moment. Fighting from her inevitable death is the only thing she can do to save her family from the grief that is sure to engulf them. But something on the horizon is about to change her life...
Forever...


(This is a Twilight fanfic set twelve years after the end of 'Breaking Dawn', but not from Bella's POV, from the POV of Ali-Rose - all will be revealed if you care to read on.)


(Author's Note: Before you read Mattie, please can I just point out that it was written when I was fourteen-fifteen years old, and it was also the first thing I ever wrote and finished, for my own benefit and that of a close friend. I know it has its flaws and I'm okay with that because this story made me grow as an author more than I could've imagined. I truly hope you enjoy it.)

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21. HEALTHY

MY HAND WAS STILL ENTWINED WITH TYLER’S AS I awoke. The pace of my heart picked up as I realised this. I heard his musical chuckle beside me.

“You must be awake.” He commented. I immediately opened my eyes. He was in the exact same position he had been in as I had fallen asleep.

“You didn’t move all night?” I asked incredulously.

“I didn’t need to.” I heard a double meaning in his words.

I searched my room for traces of Carlisle, but found nothing. Everything looked exactly how I had left it last night. There were no new notes on my desk, not even a pen was out of place. As if on cue Carlisle stepped through the door.

“Carlisle . . . ?” I asked a puzzled look on my face. “What . . . ?” The sentence faded into nothing as I realised I had no idea what I was asking.

“You had a very good night last night Mattie.” He said, answering my unintelligible question.

“How many times?” I asked squeezing Tyler’s hand for support. He squeezed back lightly.

“Zero.”

Zero? I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t form a sentence. I had been perfectly safe for twenty-four hours – healthy, even. It must have been a record. I felt pressure on my hand. I looked into Tyler’s eyes. He sucked in a short breath. I questioned him with my eyes, but he just shook his head.

“Zero?” I managed to choke.

Carlisle nodded and Tyler beamed at me.

“Wow.” I whispered. I took a deep breath, the pain was still there, but subdued, barely noticeable. “How?” I asked, still unable to form full sentences.

Carlisle shrugged. “Now that I don’t know.” Carlisle smiled as he turned and left the room. I hadn’t noticed until I saw it fly past that he was wearing his white doctor’s coat. I continued to stare at the door, frozen in shock. I barely noticed as Tyler rubbed circles into the back of my hand with his thumb, his hand was nearly as warm as mine. I turned to face him and sighed.

“What made you gasp?” I asked, suddenly remembering.

“The colour of your eyes. Are they always so beautiful?”

I felt my cheeks blaze. The rush of heat shot through my body, going straight to my cheeks. I closed my eyes to try to calm myself, but I felt a cold hand on my face and had to open them again.

“Don’t close your eyes.” He whispered to me.

 As I stared into his eyes I was love-struck, my mind couldn’t even put words together to make any sort of sentence. The intensity of his stare sent a shiver down my spine.

“Are you cold?” He asked, smiling.

I shook my head in reply.

“Good.” He answered. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his lap. I put my hand, the one that wasn’t knotted with his, on top of his other hand. He must feel what I feel. I thought to myself as I enjoyed total bliss. Why else would he act like this?

We continued to sit in our little piece of heaven until we were interrupted by Edward, who, surprisingly, wore a smug smile on his face.

“Do you want to go hunting Tyler?” He said, giving me a very significant look - he knew.

“Do I want to go? Or do I want to make everyone else feel slightly more at ease by going?”

Edward chuckled and turned to me. “Are you planning on staying in your pyjamas all day or are you going to change?” I flushed. He chuckled again.

“I will come hunting with you, I think.”

“Alright then, Bella’s already waiting.” Edward didn’t lift his significant stare as he left the room.

Tyler lifted me off his lap gently as he stood up. I reluctantly let go of his hand. I jumped up so that I was beside him. I hadn’t noticed the height difference until this moment. I stared up at him, memorising the peach colour that I would never see in his eyes again. I broke the stare by leaning my head in his chest. He stroked the top of my hair and prised my fingers from his shirt. He ran his hand through my hair once more, going from the top of my head to until it came to rest on my cheek.

“Be sure to kill a buck for me.” I whispered.

He chuckled. “Anything.” The momentous importance of the word made it ring with clarity. “I’ll be as quick as I can.”

I nodded and took a step back, worried that I’d cling to him again. He looked into my eyes, into my soul, and swiftly left the room, taking a piece of my heart with him.

 

I had to undergo many questioning eyes for the duration of Tyler’s absence. Their stares were all linked with smiles. They seemed to sense a change. After lunch Alice took me aside and asked me why she has never been able to see Tyler. My heart rate accelerated. She saw the glisten in my eyes and didn’t have to ask. She smiled and put her arms around me. I was an inch taller than Alice now. It was strange to be taller than her.

“I told you!” she said to me before skipping off to meet Jasper in the garden. I smiled at her as she disappeared. I felt lighter somehow, different. The day passed in a blur, nothing of significance happened. I ate my lunch with no complaint and sat happily chatting to Jacob until it was time for bed. I rushed into my room and sat cross legged, ready. Tyler would be home soon. I had quickly brushed through my hair before returning to my bedroom, the fact embarrassed me slightly. I felt anticipation bubble underneath my skin, I couldn’t sit still. I wondered what colour his eyes would be when he returned. Would they be the colour that I was so used to or would they still have a hint of orange in them? I purposely made sure I didn’t ask any yes or no questions, I wanted it to be a surprise. What’s happening to me? I thought hopelessly. Is this what love feels like?

Yes. Whoops. At least I knew that my feelings were sincere. I flicked through Twilight, becoming impatient. Where is he? They can’t have been in our forest, they wouldn’t have been gone long if that was the case.

“Mattie?” My head spun round, but it was only Rosalie.

“Hi Rose.” I sighed. “Is it your watch?”

She nodded, her hair flowing, dancing around her. I hated myself for feeling disappointed. Would I rather be with someone I’ve know for a couple of days than someone I’ve know my entire life?

Yes. I had forgotten that my answer book didn’t understand rhetorical questions.

“What do you think of Tyler?” She asked me as she took a seat in my armchair. It was stupid that the mere mention of his name made my pulse hammer through my body.

“He’s very nice.” My words were not strong enough. Extraordinarily wonderful wasn’t good enough either, but it was definitely closer. “What do you think?” I asked her quickly before I could lose my train of thought by thinking about Tyler.

“He’s very pleasant. His little gift is excellent isn’t it? He doesn’t have to worry about humans at all! I wish it was that easy for the rest of us.”

“It looks easy enough.” I teased.

“Well from a mature vampire’s point of view it’s not that difficult, getting used to it is.

I giggled.  “Maybe you’re just being over dramatic!” I said sarcastically, unable to keep Tyler out of my head for even a second.

She laughed with me before suddenly becoming serious. “You really like him don’t you?”

I nodded, knowing the look in my eyes would be enough.

“We can all see it, it’s blatantly obvious.”

I smiled, I knew that was true.

“If you like, when they get back I’ll ask him to swap with me.”

“Would you?” I asked, finding my voice.

“Yeah, I trust him enough with you.”

“Thanks Rose.” I said jumping up to give her a hug.

We sat in my armchair for a few minutes until Rose whispered into my hair; “We can see it in him too. The way he looks at you, it’s as though you’re the only reason he still exists.” I stared at her. She nodded. I had never felt so alive in my life. I closed my eyes and sighed, enjoying the coolness of Rosalie’s arms, but wishing it was someone else holding me.

 

 

I was unbearably hot. I knew it was still night - there was only moonlight shining through my curtains. I must have fallen asleep in Rosalie’s arms. The heat was unbearable, why had Rosalie put the quilt over me? My heat had been trapped by the quilt, making me feel as though I was in a bath of scorching lava. I stayed still, knowing movement would only make it worse. I took a few deep breaths. There was no pain. The air was cool around me. A cold hand slowly ran from the top of my head and came to rest on my cheek. It repeated its circuit three times before I opened my eyes. Tyler didn’t notice, he continued stroking my hair. His eyes were shut. I wondered what he was thinking about. I would have given anything to have known. I wanted him to be thinking of me. I was shocked at how selfish my wish was, but I couldn’t help asking. Is he thinking about me?

Yes. Euphoria overwhelmed me and my heart reached an incredible speed. His eyes opened. They were a beautiful shade of amber, more yellow than orange now. We stared into each other’s eyes for uncountable minutes. I felt him stare deep within my eyes, my mind, my core. My heart was no longer mine. It would always be his. His pale white skin looked marvellous in the strip of moonlight that ran from the gap in my curtain, to the other end of the room. His chocolate coloured hair looked warm, even though I knew it couldn’t be. It was always blown backwards from the wind. I wanted to run my hand through his hair, but stopped myself. I couldn’t risk looking away from his eyes. He smiled at me and chuckled when my heart rate increased.

“So how was your day?” he asked. His voice was as smooth as silk.

“Well, you know . . . too long.”

He chuckled. “What did you do?”

“A little of this, a little of that - nothing of interest.”

“Please, I’m curious.” He stared into my eyes making it impossible to resist.

“I didn’t do anything really. Got up, got dressed, had lunch, chatted to everyone - mostly Jake, got ready for bed, sat with Rosalie, fell asleep. Can’t get more boring than that.”

He chuckled again.

 “Your turn.” I said, not letting him get away with staying quiet. “How was your day?”

“Too long.” he repeated my words.

“‘What did you do’, probably isn’t the right question is it?”

He laughed; it was a very pleasant sound.

“So . . .  tell me something! It has to be more interesting than my day!”

“I did a little of this and a little of that,” He smiled teasing me. “Nothing of interest.”

I growled softly, a smile still on my face.

He laughed again. “Annoying isn’t it?”

“Extremely.”

“Well we ran for a while, hunted deer, ran some more, found a bear – that was nice for a change, I’m already sick of deer and elk.” He pulled a face.

“I know exactly what you mean. I haven’t had a carnivore in about a year.”

He looked apologetic and ran his hand through my hair again. It took me a minute to control myself. The talk of bear had made my mouth water. I took a deep breath, and he smiled, making my heart – only just recovered from before – beat at an alarming rate.

“You’re good at controlling yourself.” He commented. “You extinguished the excitement in your eyes pretty quickly.”

“I have to.” I sighed. “I don’t get to hunt that often, it’s dangerous when I do.” I automatically looked down, cursing myself because I could no longer see his eyes. He put his hand under my chin and lifted my head, locking it in place with his eyes. I smiled softly.

“You should get some sleep.”

“I’ve had some.”

“Not enough.” He said, removing his hand from my chin. I put my hand in his and squeezed, staring into his eyes. He gasped. “Are you not hot?” I’d completely forgotten about blazing heat, the reason I had woken up in the first place.

“Yeah, scorching.”

“Come here.”

I slid into his open arms and sighed as his cool arms wrapped around me. He kicked my quilt off of my bed. He managed to manoeuvre himself, with me in his arms, so that we were lying down. I wondered when I had sat up. I twisted around so I was cuddling him and shut my eyes. I had never been so utterly content. I concentrated on the steady rhythm of Tyler’s breathing, and drifted off to sleep.

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