Chasing Love

I didn't want this life for me. I hated it. All I ever wanted was a new beginning. And maybe that's what I'll get.


2. Auden

I stepped on to the busy streets of London, not knowing what came next. I stood still for a moment, just perusing around the amount of people, the double-decker buses, and the many cars.

I tried to sit on the curb for a bit, but after the sixth person stomped on my pillow case full of things, I was just about done.

I pushed myself off the ground and brushed off the dirt on the back of my jeans. I took my long, wavy brown hair and blew it out of my face, spotting a small cafe just across the street.
It looked home-y. And it looked posh. Nothing that I would know of.

"That's Cafe Delancey," a British man explained to me. "It's got great tasting hot chocolate. Perfect for this cold weather," he continued as he rested his hand on my shoulder.

I shoved it off viciously as I spoke up without making eye contact.

"Um...I-I don't have any money."

He raised his left brow and thought for a second.

"American, eh?" He asked. I nodded my head softly and watched him pull out his wallet and hand me a twenty.

"No! I can take care of myself. I don't need-"

"Yes you do. Just take it. I've got enough Darling," he said holding the money in front of me, waiting for me to take it. When I didn't, he bent down and rested it on the ground.

"Well if you aren't going to take it then I guess the rats can have it."

And with those last words, he adjusted his heavy coat and walked away.

I paced back and forth on the sidewalk, not taking my eyes off the money.

If I take it, I can buy myself a hot chocolate to keep me warm and some extra food for the week. But if I don't take it, then I die of starvation.

And without anymore deliberation, I picked up the twenty and walked over to the cafe.

It was fairly empty, with only a few teenagers spread out at different ends of the building. Each of them had either a laptop or a notebook, busily working away with their drinks slowly freezing by the minute.

I ordered a medium hot chocolate and a blueberry muffin from a snobby barista. She was a petite girl about my age with short blonde hair and bangs. Her glowing blue eyes complimented her features very well, lighting up the whole room. The orbs looked me up and down, sniggering at my ripped and dirty clothes.

I suddenly became very self-conscious. I wasn't really what you could call "the girly-girl type". More of a tom-boy type. And I wasn't that much of a crowd pleaser either.

I took my food from her perfectly manicured hands and offered a snarl that was quickly returned in my direction.

I could feel her gaze bore into my back as I strode to the back of the restaurant, choosing a table for two that was secluded in its own little corner.

I sat on the chair and immediately gulped down my hot chocolate, remembering what it felt like to be warm.

"Auden! Stop it!"

The breathtaking aroma of nature was filled with the sweet sounds of my little brother's laugh.

"I'm not gonna stop tickling you until you admit it!" I yelled as my hands maneuvered round his stomach, emitting loud laughs from within his mouth.

"Never!" He said in-between breaths.

He couldn't help it. I was the master at tickling. My whole family knew it to.

"Say it!"

Now I was laughing too.

"C'mon kids, s'mores are ready!" My mom yelled over the roar of the fire.

I let go of Ben and set him down on the ground.

"You got lucky, Kiddo." I said as I ruffled my hands through his blonde, shaggy hair.

My family gathered round the fire and began munching on our delicious snacks. Dad began to play the guitar and Mom hummed along to the beat.

"Come here Ben I'm cold!" I whined.

He scooted over to me and leaned against my shoulder.

"You're such a girl," he chuckled.

I gave him my leftover chocolate and held him close to my heart, both of us snuggling under the warm blanket together. I planted a small kiss on his forehead and caressed his back softly.

"I love you, Auds."

"Love you too, Ben."

My thoughts were suddenly interrupted when a group of boys walked through the cafe doors, causing a loud jingling sound to occur.


A blonde boy sprinted off towards the barista, who was apparently named "Kenzie".

They both reached over the counter as far as they could and pressed their lips against each other. They stayed like that for a long time.

I watched as four other boys awkwardly waited for their runaway friend. They didn't look amused at the make out scene occurring right in front of everyone.

"I missed you so much, Babe!" Kenzie whispered after minutes of lip-locking.

"Not as much as I missed you. Uni isn't the same without you." The boy let out a huff of air.

"I want you to come back," he pleaded.

Kenzie scooted away from his hold and walked around the counter to her lover. She grasped his hand and guided him to an "employee only" area.

I could only make out a few key words of their conversation.

"I want to...but my dad..." Kenzie said softly.

"I can help you through this!"

"No, Niall. I'm afraid no one can."

So his name was Niall.

Kenzie kissed Niall on the cheek and walked away, continuing her job.

Niall just stood there, in the same position he was in when he first walked to that spot. He looked awestruck at her words. But Kenzie didn't seem to care. Her decision was final.

I continued to stare at the sad couple, unaware that someone else was staring at me.

He held his hands in his pockets, hiding behind his friends to try to be unnoticed.

But the split second my eyes locked to his emeralds, his face turned a bright crimson and immediately stormed out the cafe.

The other boys scratched their heads curiously and looked in my direction. My gaze fell to the floor, the last thing being seen before they exited the building was a horrid look on Niall's face.

I quickly downed the rest of my hot chocolate and gathered my belongings.

"Hey can I have a bag to go?" I asked Kenzie.

"What, so you can have something better than that ratchet pillow case of yours? Have some class, will you?" She replied, not bothering to look me in the eye.

"No. I want to wrap up my muffin," I harshly replied.

She snickered.

"Here you go," Kenzie said as she handed me the brown paper bag.

I snatched it from her hands, wondering if that was all she had in her. And when she didn't reply, a tiny smirk spread across my face as I sashayed away.

"Maybe I should rub it in the dirt and rip it up so it can match your outfit."

I swung around and looked at a pleased Kenzie who was leaned up against the counter picking at her finger nails.

My hands balled up in a fist, ready to pounce, but then I remembered something.

"Mom, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to do that!"

"You hurt my feelings, Auden."

Whenever my mom called me by my real name, you automatically knew something was very wrong.

I chased after her down the hall and grabbed her hand.

"But it was just a stupid comment! I was mad and you slapped me!" I explained.

"I slapped you because you weren't doing what was told and you gave me rude retaliation!" She yelled.

I felt my throat well up with sadness. I could barely speak.

"Please...I'm sorry..." I whispered.

"It's too late now."

My fists clenched tightly.

She saw them.

"Violence is never the answer."

Kenzie saw my fists too.

"Oh, now you're gonna fight me?" She asked.

I let let my hands fall freely at my side, allowing the blood to recirculate through them.

"Violence is never the answer." I replied confidently.

And with that, I continued to sashay towards the exit.

I opened the door and immediately froze in my place. The cold winds hit my thin clothes hard. I didn't know what to do. It was best if I just stay in the cafe --more time to live. But I couldn't bare to go back in that place with that horrid girl.

I looked around me for a nearby bench, but it was occupied.

I squinted my eyes and tried to figure out who was in the only place I had left.

I stepped a little closer and saw those bright emerald eyes glistening in the moonlight. They shined almost as bright as the stars.

I couldn't help myself, it was like I just got lost in them. There was no ending to what was held inside those majestic orbs. It made me think, and imagine.

But when they connected with mine, my heart fluttered. I was so embarrassed that as I tried to walk away, I fell hard on the ground. I didn't even notice this place had steps.

He chuckled a little at my clumsiness, which revealed two dimples on either side of his face.

That caused me to smile.

And then I wiped it right off my face, just as abruptly as it had appeared.

I brushed myself off, picked up my things, and hurriedly walked away. I never want to see that curly haired boy again.


After what felt like hours of walking, I finally reached a park. It was deserted, as it was late at night, so I chose a red bench next to the swing set.

I sat myself down and felt relieved. I slipped off my shoes and received immediate pain rushing through my toes. It was so cold. I massaged my feet for as long as I could bare this weather, and I pushed my shoes back on.

I took out my blanket from my pillow case and wrapped it tightly around my body.

I sprawled out over the bench and hoped to God that I would still be alive by morning.

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