C'est La Vie

HIM: Niall James Horan. Irish. Boyband member. My best friend. The guy I am hopelessly in love with. All rolled up into one.
ME: Maxime Adelina Mercer. American, but of French descent (cue to my name, in case you couldn’t tell). Personal trainer/physical therapist for previously mentioned boyband. Eternally friendzoned.

Will Niall ever see me as more than just a friend? Or is this just the life I'm destined to live? Being friendzoned by the boy who means more than the world to me.

Find out more in "C'est La Vie"

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2. Talking With This Sassy Shit I Know.

 -MAX’S POV-

“Hurry up you lazy ass!” I yelled at Louis in the hotel gym, where we were alone. “You’ve got less than a quarter of a mile left to go, push it!”

Louis answered me in between gasps for breath as he ran on the treadmill as hard as he could. “Shut…the…fuck…up….Max…I’m…going…as fast…as I…can!”

I laughed at him from my comfortable lying position on the bench press. I wasn’t actually lifting though, just chilling like the lazy hoebag I am.

I don’t mean that, I’m actually incredibly healthy and well maintained. I think the main reason I’m such a good personal trainer is because I take really good care of my own body. I work out every morning and every night, running two miles, lifting, and doing lots of abdominal work. I’m pretty damn fit if I do say so myself.

Louis Tomlinson on the other hand, is afraid that Niall is starting to get better abs than him (and I’m not saying it’s true, but…it’s true), and the little sassy shit can’t have that. So he asked me to start training with him apart from the other boys. Which I gladly accepted of course. I mean what kind of idiotic sexually frustrated girl would pass up an opportunity to ogle Louis Tomlinson’s ass while he runs on a treadmill?

Not this sexually frustrated motherfucker, I’ll tell you that!

Louis finally finished up his fourth mile and placed his legs on either side of the moving belt while it slowed down, catching his breath. And you’re damn right I propped up on my elbows to have a nice little ogling session.

Hot damn he looked fine as hell right in that very moment. I mean, with the sweat dripping from his brow, bare abs glistening like he was an angel or something, hunched over and panting for breath. What I would give to have him on top of me looking like that, sweaty and gasping, maybe screaming out my name as he— 

“Oi! Max!” Louis interrupted my sexually driven fantasy, and I snapped my head up to his face.

“What?” I asked incredulously.

Louis just laughed. “You were staring at me you dumbass.”

“Oh.” I said simply. “Yeah, I know.”

There’s no point lying right? I mean Louis looks like a fucking sex god and he knows it, so what the hell?

Louis chuckled yet again and jumped off the machine to grab a towel and drink from his water bottle. He lifted the bottle to his lips and I bit my bottom lip watching him lean his head back and drink. Still shirtless, mind you. Hot damn he is one fine ass motherfucker.

“Max!” Louis yelled at me again, seeing me staring from the corner of his eye. He lowered the water so quickly in order to scold me that some of it was dripping from his chin to his abs and oh sweet Jesus I just wanted to lick it off.

Don’t judge me! I haven’t gotten laid in six months, give me a fucking break. I can fantasize about one of my best friends if I want to, thank you very much!

“What now?!” I yelled back at Louis.

“Stop dreaming about having sex with me you slut!”

I threw my head back and laughed. Louis and I were notorious for calling each other rude names. “Well then stop having such lickable abs douchewad!”

Louis did yet another spittake as I shouted back at him. Being the weirdo that I am, I started laughing so hard that I actually rolled off the bench onto the gym floor, having to clutch my stomach from my hysterics.

Louis just stared at me like I was a complete retard, which just made me laugh even harder. He started to pull a tshirt on, muttering something under his breath that sounded a lot like, “I feel violated.”

Once I finally caught my breath, I stayed in my laying position on the floor, staring up at the ceiling. Without saying a word, Louis strolled over and lay down next to me.

This was a usual thing for me; doing something weird that made no sense whatsoever, just for the sake of doing it. The boys were pretty used to it, seeing as I had been with them for eight months thus far. So what if I decided to lay down in the middle of an empty gym, stare at the ceiling, and think. I mean, why not? I may never have this opportunity again. So I might as well do it while I can.

I take the phrase YOLO very seriously.

And the boys loved me for it. According to them, I was quirky and spontaneous – which made me cool. By my own standards though, I was an awkward turtle who liked to do stupid things that were fun – which made me fucking awesome.

“Hey dipshit?” I said to get Louis’ attention after a few quiet moments.

“What whoreface?”

“Do you think that there’s one person out there for everyone? I mean like, do you believe in soulmates?”

Louis said nothing for a few seconds before turning on his side and propping up on his elbow to face me. “What is this? Is the one and only Maxime Mercer actually asking a serious question?” He asked teasingly.

I rolled my eyes and grinned at him. “Shutup I can be serious!”

“Name one time other than right now.”

Fuck.

“Um…”

“That’s what I thought. What’s bringing this about?”

I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t know.”

Yes I do.

“Do you like someone?” Louis asked, his interest finally peaked.

I scoffed. “No of course not.”

Yes I do.

“Yes you do!” Louis shouted at me, grinning like an idiot as he pulled himself up to a sitting position.

“No I don’t, I’m telling the truth!”

Just kidding, I’m totally lying my ass off right now.

“Who is it Max?”

“Nobody!”

It’s Niall.

“Do I know them?”

“No!”

Yes, it’s your best friend.

“AHA!” Louis shouted, pointing his finger right in my face.

Fuck, did I just say that out loud?

No.

No?

No.

Definitely not.

“Get your damn finger out my face you asswipe.” I shoved Louis’ hand away and sat up to face him. “What are you aha-ing about?”

“I asked if I knew them and you said no, which means that there is a them, and you do like someone!”

Shit.

“Erm…”

Louis fist pumped the air and stood up to do a little happy dance. “Max likes somebody and I’m the first to kno-ow!” He sing-songed.

“You’re a fucking idiot you know that?” I asked obnoxiously.

Louis stopped dancing and looked at me and shrugged. “Yeah. I know.” Then he went and sat down on one of the exercise balls and starting bouncing up and down on it. “But we know all the same people, and I’m assuming this is a recent development, so you must be lying when you say I don’t know them.”

Damn Tomlinson, your mama gave you more than your looks.

Louis grinned at my shocked silence. “Well I’ll take that as a yes.”

I flipped him off like the lady I am.

“So who could it be? Hmmm…” He got up and started to pace. “Who could it be?”

“Louis would you drop this it’s not a big deal.”

He ignored me like the asshole that he is.

“Well it’s certainly not me.” He said matter-of-factly, putting his hand on his chest. “I mean, I know you want to fuck me and all, but you don’t see me romantically - I’m sure of it. Not to mention that you care about Eleanor way too much to ever do that to her.”

He’s right there. Louis’ girlfriend Eleanor is one of my best friends, even though I hardly ever get to see her, which kills me. I don’t see how Louis stands being away from her, it drives me insane and I’m just her friend!

I guess their love is just that strong.

Could I ever have that kind of love with someone one day? Preferably a blonde Irish someone?

“It’s not Liam, you’re not attracted to the serious type, and you love Danielle. And it sure as hell isn’t Harry because he pisses you off more than any of us.”

True story there, Curly can take my temper from 0-100 in two seconds. But I still love him.

Louis continued. “And I know it’s not Niall, because you two are like, best friends and nothing more.”

Yeah, totally.

Wait.

What the fuck?

Am I really that much in the friendzone that even Louis sees that I don’t stand a chance with Niall?

What the actual fuck?!

“So out of us five, that just leaves…” Louis turned to me with a smirk. “Zayn.”

“Tan motherfucker say what?”

I’m a pleasant bitch, am I not?

Louis grinned. “It makes sense. He and Perrie broke up a few months ago, you guys text all the time—“

“I text all of you boys all the time, that doesn’t mean anything.”

“and you’re always teasing each other—“

“I tease everyone Louis, I’m a bitch, it’s what I do!”

“and you’re the only person he lets touch his hair—“

“Okay you’re delusional.”

“You are so in love with him!”

“Wait who is Max in love with?”

What?

Hold the fucking phone.

Insert brake squealing noise here because shit just got real.

“Oh hey Niall.” Louis said calmly, turning to greet our friend who had entered the gym unnoticed who knows how long ago.

Welp, I’m fucked.

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