Yellow Diamonds (On Hold)

It's like you're screaming and no one can hear, you almost feel ashamed, that someone could be that important that without them, you feel like nothing. No one will ever understand how much it hurts, you feel hopeless like nothing can save you, and when it's over and it's almost wish that you could have all that bad stuff back so that you could have the good.


23. Chapter 16


I walked to the door and knocked. After a few minutes the door finally opened and there he was, looking as sexy as ever. No! I can't think this about him! "Holly?" He asked. "Hi Niall." "C-come in." I walked into what was once our apartment and looked around at the place. I couldn't help but feel happy here, this is where a lot of my memories with Niall were, the good and the bad. He cleared some beer cans from around the sofa and let me sit. "Whats up Holly?" "Not much, I just thought I should see you. I'm not getting a DNA test done when the baby is born, Zayn has agreed to raise it even if it isn't his." "Do I get a say in this?" "No, i'm sorry Niall. It's for the best." "Is that the only reason you came here? To tell me something about your life because I have some weed that I need to smoke." "Your still doing that stuff?" "Yeah, why do you care?" "It's bad for you Niall, you stopped once you really should try to stop again." "It's hard." "I did it and if I can then you can too." "I don't need a lecture from you." "Well mess up your own life if you want to," I replied while standing up. I walked for the door. "Why did you come here today?" "To tell you about the baby situation." "I mean why did you really come here today? We both know that's a lie." "It's not!" "If you didn't love me you wouldn't have come near me, you would have just raised the baby as Zayn's and never told me if it was mine or not. You love me and we both know it, you just don't want to admit it." "I don't love you Niall and I haven't loved you for quite a while. I love Zayn, not you." "I'm sure you do but you love me too." "Just let me leave and please Niall try to sort out your life. I don't want to be at your funeral by the time your 20." "If you kiss me i'll quit, for good this time." "I'm not kissing you." "Then I guess i'll see you at my funeral in 2 years time." "Niall, I can't cheat on Zayn." "Don't think of it as cheating. Think of it as a last kiss, for old times sake. Then i'll quit." I sighed before replying "Fine." He grinned before pressing his lips to mine and straight away I felt the butterflies in my stomach. I hadn't felt that in a while, come to think of it I hadn't felt that since I left Niall. When I pulled away I couldn't help but think maybe I didn't love Zayn after all.
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