Dreaming With Secrets

Harry has an odd, reoccurring dream about some mystery girl. When he finds out that Zayn knows who this girl is, Harry wants to get to know her. Zayn however, doesn't approve of Harry getting to know her. Even against Zayn's will, they get together. No matter how hard Zayn tries, they both push to be together. But when Zayn tries to pull them apart and Bethany ends up right back in her past, can Harry save her and get Zayn to approve of them, or will Bethany's past kill her first?
Includes self harm references/actions, sex, drugs, alcohol, and cursing

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21. Progress

 

Bethany:

When I rolled over, waking up after what felt like years, I saw Harry sitting on the bed silently watching TV. I reached over and gently touched his arm, making him jump.

“Well, good afternoon.” Harry said, smiling.

“What time is it?” I asked quietly.

“Around noon; you got some well needed sleep.”  A small smile appeared on my face. Harry reached over and helped me into sitting position. After I was situated, he picked up my throw-up bucket as we called it and he placed it on my lap.

“Harry…” I whimpered.

“We’re going to try a couple bites.” My bottom lip quivered as Harry picked up a bowl of broth.

“Harry…I can’t do it…” I said as I started to cry.

“Hey…hey…babe, don’t cry.” He wiped my tears away and kissed my lip slowly and gently. “Try two bites…for me?” I sniffled and nodded slowly.

“I’ll do it…” I whispered. Harry lifted the spoonful of broth to my lips and slipped it into my mouth. I swallowed it slowly. My stomach started to turn and I felt myself begin to gag so Harry put the soup to the side. I felt it coming up. Harry reached over and pulled my hair back with one hand and grabbed one of my hands with the other.

“It’s okay baby…” Harry whispered. I was about to let it out, but I somehow managed to force it all back down. I coughed a little but then looked back up at Harry.

“Can I have another spoonful?” I whispered. Harry’s eyes grew wide but grabbed the soup before I could change my mind. He gave me another spoonful and the same thing happened. We did this for a good hour before I decided I had enough. I decided that I had enough. I had finished off half of the broth and I felt pretty accomplished.

“Do you want to come downstairs?” Harry asked. I nodded slowly. “Okay, let me bring this downstairs and then I’ll be back up to help you downstairs.” I watched Harry as he slowly left the room. I threw back the blankets and grunted as I stepped out of the bed. I stumbled from the weakness in my legs, but got out anyway. I leaned my body on the wall for support as I walked towards the door. I made it to the door, then grabbed the doorframe as I pushed myself out and back towards the wall in the hallway. I used that wall as my support as I kept going. When I got to the stairs, I turned and placed my stomach on the stairs, like I was a baby and slid down. I landed at the bottom of the stairs with a thud. I used the railing to pull myself up. As I got up and turned, everyone appeared into view. Harry’s face was beyond pale.

“I did it…” I whispered.

“I told you I would come get you…” Harry said as he reached for me.

“I wanted to see if I could do it myself. If I could eat half a bowl of broth, I figured I could try and walk by myself…” I said slowly.

“You ate something?!” Bradie yelled. I nodded slowly and Harry lifted me up so he could carry me the rest of the way.

“Let’s not over work your body; one step at a time.” Harry said. I nodded as I curled into him. He carried me to the living room while everyone else followed. He placed me down and wrapped me in blankets as we spent the rest of the day watching TV together.

Around eleven, Harry brought me upstairs to our room. He tucked me into bed and crawled in next to me. The room was dark but I knew he was still awake.

“Harry?” I whispered. I heard the blankets rustle than his curls tickle my face.

“Yes baby?” He whispered into my ear. I shivered at his breath touching my ear, not realizing how close he was until now. I moved my hand and touched his cheeks. I heard him let out a quiet laugh as I pushed his curls from his face.

“I love you.”

“I love you.” I leaned in just a little and kissed him. I gasped into the kiss, forgetting how much I loved his kisses. I pushed myself more into him and kissed him harder. “Bethany…” Harry said, breathing into my mouth.

“What?” I whispered.

“I don’t want to do this…I don’t want to hurt you…”

“I need you…” I whimpered as I ran my hand through his curls slowly. Harry sighed but let me start kissing him, and a few kisses later he started kissing me back. He rolled over so he was on top of me.

“Tell me if I start to hurt you…” Harry whispered as he started kissing my neck, pressing his body to mine. It was hard to breathe because his weight was on me, but I didn’t want to tell him. He sucked lightly on my neck, leaving small love bites. I squirmed underneath him and pulled him back up so I could keep kissing him, but mid-kiss I started coughing. Harry quickly rolled off me and my coughing slowed. “Why didn’t you tell me you couldn’t breathe?” I felt tears prick my eyes.

“Because I love you…I wanted you…” I mumbled. I felt Harry wrap his arms around me and pull me into him. My head was under his head, against his chest.

“We can wait until you’re better. I’m not going to hurt you more just for this. I still love you.” Harry whispered in my ear. I sobbed quietly as I cried into his chest until I fell asleep.

When I woke up the next morning, Harry was running around the room in a crazy fashion. I pushed myself up so I was sitting.

“Good morning.” I whispered. Harry halted and looked at me with sad eyes. “What’s going on…?”

“Babe, please don’t be mad at me…” Harry begged quietly.

“What’s going on?” Harry sighed and ran his hands through his hair.

“The boys and I have a press conference in Australia…and you, Bradie, and Zee aren’t allowed to come…” I felt myself begin to cry again. Harry rushed to my side and sat down. “Baby, please don’t cry…I’ll be back in four to five days…” Harry even sounded unsure of himself as he said this.

“But…I need you to keep me strong…”

“You have Zee and Bradie. I know you can do it. I’ll call you and Skype you every night.”

“HARRY, LET’S GO!” I heard Niall’s thick accent call up. Harry pulled me to him and he kissed me passionately.

“I love you.” Harry whispered against my lips before kissing me again. He then got up, grabbed his suitcase, and ran out. 

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