A Sad Beautiful Tragic Love Affair

They say that you don't know what you got until it's gone. but the truth is you know what you had, you just never thought you would lose it.

The memories haunts, they just come screaming at me in flashbacks..... -Niall Horan

I remember everything but the cruelest thing of all is wondering if he moved on. - Vyvonne Lopez

I can't be happy..... it's impossible at this point -Niall Horan

Then he found me.. i can't decide if either keeping him or losing him will hurt more... -Vyvonne Lopez


7. Distance Timing

IT was a week since I left the hospital. Anna is always on the phone talking to her boyfriend- Zayn... I was jealous, if only I could also talk to Niall. I miss him so much; I miss his voice, his laugh, the way he looks at me, the way he cuddles me, and everything about him. I wish I could go back to the past and correct what I’ve done wrong...


* It was a day before Niall’s birthday. He told that they will have a concert at Madison Square Garden the day after his birthday. I am scared of leaving him, but I don’t have any choice. Paul always reminds me about our deal, well I don’t consider it a deal because it is against my will. When I imagine about of leaving Niall it makes me want to cry. I love him so much and I want him to be safe. Paul was right leaving him was the best way for both of us. I looked at Niall who was peacefully sleeping, he like an angel. My eyes are starting to get heavy. I couldn’t imagine life without him; he’s the reason for waking up each morning. He’s the reason why I smile every day. We promised to each other that no matter what will happen we will never leave each other.

I walked to the bed and touch Niall’s face. Tears are falling into my cheeks, “Hubby I’m so sorry if I will break our promise, I don’t want anything bad will happen to you again. I love you and that’s the reason why I am leavening you, if we are meant for each other... I know God will find its own way to bring us back together again. It’s not easy to bid my goodbye to you personally because I know you will stop me from leaving. Sorry if I can’t say it to you personally because if I did that things will be much harder for the both of us. I don’t want to see you crying because it hurts me more. Seeing you being hurt are killing me, you know that. Well you also broke our promised that keeping secrets right? Well I will forgive you with that and I hoped you’ll forgive me with this... I love you no matter what will happen. You’re the first person who believed that I am capable of loving. You taught me how to love again. Thank you for coming into my life and making me always happy. Thank you for giving me beautiful memories that I can keep forever in my heart... Goodbye is not the appropriate word to use but I hoped to see you soon hubby.” I kissed his forehead and Niall started to move, I immediately wipe my tears

“Hey are you crying?” Niall asked me.

“No I’m not crying” I shook my head and he hugged me tight.

“Well whatever the reason behind your tears you can always tell me wifey...” he kissed my forehead.

“It’s nothing Okay” I flashed my sweetest smile on him, but deep inside of me I am crying in pain...

“Let’s go back to sleep and tomorrow will make ourselves happy okay I love you Wifey I always do,”

“I love you too Hubby” I hoped you can forgive me in doing this to you. I hope you can understand me. I know you will but not for now I guess.

I watched him while he was sleeping. I don’t want to sleep because I know it will be the last time I will watch him sleeping, I want to cherish this moment, this final moment that we were together.


IT was Niall’s birthday, he was throwing a party at our apartment, yes Niall and I live in the same apartment. He was too busy organizing it, guests are starting to come. Whenever I see Niall it breaks my heart knowing that this might be the last time I will see his handsome face. If only we are normal people things will surely be easy for the both of us.

“Wifey” Niall hugged me at my back.

“Hmm. Yes hubby?” I said to him, holding back my tears. It was never easy to pretend that you are fully okay when the truth is you’re dying inside.

“Hey why are you so quiet? Is there anything wrong?” – Yes hubby there is, I am leaving you for God damn sake. I can’t hold the pain anymore. It’s killing me. I was telling this at the back of my mind. I can’t keep a secret to him because he’s too irresistible and he’s too kind. I wish I could tell him what I feel right now but I can’t... if only I could... I looked at the whole place and Paul was looking at us. There’s no turning back. I have to do it.. For his safety as well as mine too. I know I am being unfair and selfish but you can’t blame me. I love him so much and I will do anything for him.

“Nothing hubby, are the lads are here?” I asked Niall to change the topic. I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t know how to tell him that I am ending our relationship with each other. Pain is striking on my heart again.

“Liam and Danielle are here as well as Lou, El and Hazza.”

“Where is Zayn and Anna?” I wanted to tell Anna my whole plan. I know she’ll completely understand me, besides she’s my best friend...

“Zayn texted me that there are on their way here” I nod to him and he kissed me on my cheeks.  God Niall is such a sweet lad? He's making my situation much harder than I thought it was.

“Wifey stay here, I have something to give to you” I looked at him and he flashes his beautiful smile on me. ‘

“Wait hubby... I am supposed to give you something because it’s your birthday and not mine.” I smiled back at him while saying those words

“Just wait there wifey I’ll get it...” I nod at him. He was so perfect, A perfect boyfriend and best friend. I never thought this thing will happen to us, it is a life a death situation where I have to choose. I don’t want to end this relationship. He is the best thing that girls want to have. If I let him go I know I will regret this forever.

“Hey Vyvonne are you ok? You look so tired.” Anna said to me. I didn’t notice that she’s here already. My thoughts are eating me.

“Yeah... Actually no... I have to tell you something.” I said to Anna “Oh hi Zayn.., Can I borrow your girlfriend just for a while, and tell Niall I’m stairs if he searched for me” Zayn nod at me.. Anna and I went upstairs so that no one can hear our conversation.

“Is this a serious matter Vy?” She asked whilst she was sitting on the bed.

“Yeah... Please don’t tell anybody about this talk no matter what will happen” I said I was tearing a bit,

“Why? Please tell me now” Tears are starting to fall in my eyes.

“The management wants us to end our relationship... “My voice is shaking. I can feel the pain again. I hate it. I don’t want to cry again but I can’t help it.

“What? Why? What happened?” Anna is starting to throw me questions,

“These past few weeks Niall had been receiving death threats and he even got stabbed and rush into the hospital, when we were in New York, he didn’t tell me about that.”

“Zayn didn’t tell me that” Anna said

“Niall told them to not tell anyone about it. I’ve also made some research and I’ve found out that it’s true. I even saw the scar of Niall” I composed myself and wipe my tears

“So what’s your plan?

“I have to end our relationship by simply leaving and let him go for all safety. Even though it’s killing me, I want everyone to be safe so I am sacrificing our relationship. Can you please help me?” I started to plead at her

“Are you sure about this?”

“Yes I am, we should be going now Niall might be searching for us. The party is starting.” We went downstairs.

“Wifey over here.” Niall is waving at us. We walk towards Niall and she hugged me again. I can see that Anna is watching us.

“Where you two have been?” he asked. He was still hugging me like there’s no tomorrow.

“Upstairs and here’s my gift to you Happy Birthday Hubby. I love you” I kissed him full on his lips. I don’t care if everybody is watching us. All I know is I will miss his lips.

“Hey! Get a room you two” Louis said while smiling.. he was with El.

“Happy Birthday mate...” Harry hugged him.

“Thank you mate.” He answered back. I was looking at them the whole time he was so happy.

“Excuse me mate.. We have to do something.” He said to them then he pulled me out of the crowd. We were heading at the garden...

“What’s in the gift?” he asked me.

“I knitted a beanie for you.” He opened the box

“This is beautiful oh wait I also have something for you,” he took out a small box in his pocket. And place the ring on my finger

“This is beautiful Hubby, Thank you...” The ring was an infinity ring.

“Well I also have a letter for you so that you won’t miss me when I am on tour. I will give to you later.” He said with his gorgeous smile.

“Really? Thank you you’re such a sweet lad.” Then I kissed him on the lips.


THE party has ended. Niall and I were in our bed cuddling.

“Wifey tomorrow morning we will leave” He said while pinching my nose.

“Do you want me to cook for you?” I asked him.

“No.. And here’s my letter for you. Wifey I’m sleepy” he said to me.

“Ok will sleep now. I love you hubby.”

“I love you more, wifey, I will miss you.” Then he closed his eyes. I watch him sleep and then I remember Niall’s letter. I went outside our room and started to read the letter. Tears are streaming down my face. Of the entire letter he gave to me this letter made me cry I don’t know.

I went to the study room and get a piece of paper and write a letter for him. I am crying again while writing that letter. I put it in the pocket of his Jacket. I went on our bed and kissed Niall on his forehead and bid my goodbye for him “Goodnight Hubby... See you soon”


"Hey Vy your spacing out again.. I have a good news You're going back to London" Anna said whilst smiling

"Really?" Finally I will see Niall again. 

"Yes, so take a rest now and tomorrow morning will be our flight"

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